I hate christmas

I hear you OP. I hate it. Shopped, cooked and cleaned for the last 20 years. Totally fed up. Elderly parents so can't really get out of it. The thought that I could still be doing the same in 10 years time and my mother could be 100 and my life could be over makes me so depressed.

"NOBODY LIKES SPROUTS"

Preach!

Yeah I know, lots of people like them, but for me they're fart grenades.

They also make a good prank during Halloween, by the way. Save up some Ferrero Rocher foils and wrap sprouts in them. It's up there with dipping onions in toffee or dipping chocolate and serving them as toffee apples.

Sometimes I feel grateful that I don't have any friends !......Hundreds coming around ? Pure hell, I sympathise !

I like Christmas. I go to my sister and brother in law. They cook i buy wine. We eat, drink ,read books, watch telly, maybe go for a walk. We all enjoy it, do what we want and none of the nonsense
What you describe sounds horrible. Yanbu

This is one of my regrets! Due to rubbish brothers and my parents retiring a few hundred miles away I said no to invites of winter sun or skiing with my fellow single friends throughout my 20's and 30's. Because I felt obliged. Christmas seems to be about obligations to everyone else and rarely to do what we'd all like personally to do... so...

I say, please do it for yourself and do it for me, ha ha, go get your winter sun! Please come back next year though and let us all know how fab it was :-)

ps, as the years have gone by I have disliked Xmas a little more each year. Now I also hate it.

Same. Happily worked Boxing Day and New Year’s Eve and Day. I jump at the chance. I loved the break from family and it was easy money.

This is why I don't mind working on Christmas day !

You sound a right killjoy OP, its one day.

Well, I love all that stuff but I totally get why you wouldn't and if I allowed myself to get into a different mindset I would hate it all.

I'm gradually disliking Christmas more and more, and to be honest I think it's the cost of everything. I save every month for Christmas and used to have money left over, now I'm lucky if what I save covers essentials! But I'm reluctant to save more because it really is just one day.
We don't do the visit everybody thing though, we decided many years ago that we weren't traipsing the kids around in the car, so we do spend the day at home which I do enjoy (probably because by that point the stress is over and I can look forward to call the midwife Xmas special and a cheeseboard!)

PS report back - I’m invested in next years InOut Christmas being a joy for you x

Quite right too! Your house, you’re in charge. Too late for this year but remind yourself of the bitter lessons and make a plan for next year. Write it all out - the arrangements, the food, the presents etc etc etc. ALL the details. A playbook for yourself for next year.

Talk, after Christmas, with your husband about the changes you want to make next year and get him on side. I don’t know how old your kids are but, if appropriate, bite the bullet and pave the way with them too.

From summer on, engage with your campaign - so anyone who needs to know has bags of notice - and stay strong-minded.

You do the majority of the work so make the Christmas that suits YOU, OP x

aware that next year it’s goingand set up a fresh

Not a fan either. Too much pressure. This year it’s just me, youngest DD (nearly 18) and dog. We are doing what we please. Neighbour will pop over for a drink, and i’ll be working apart from bank hols.

That does sound shit. I'd hate it too if it was like that. You need to have a frank discussion with DH, let him know it isn't working for you and you aren't doing it anymore.

Yes thats my plan last year i went to japan for 3 weeks.
I dont do xmas at all, i was going to go away this year, but thought id better get my flat painted out.
So i shall be painting and spring cleaning all of december.
Netx year im planing to go vietnam or somewhere far away from all the xmass crap, i`ll come back in the new year when its all over.

How old are your children? If you say you’ve been doing it for 30 years it sounds like they may already be adults. If they’re 21 or over just say you’re not doing it next year as you’ll be away. They will make excellent plans of their own. You also say “hundreds “ people. If you have a big family can’t someone else take the heat one year? Why is your family always hosting?

”hundreds” of them?

That sounds awful to be fair. Could you be having to 'work' last minute, but actually spend it with a friend? Or develop a migraine which means you can't go out visiting people? I'd push back in some way this year, even if it's just disappearing into a different room for longer than you previously had to avoid listening to the in laws. Tiny acts of rebellion!

You csnt be the only one who hates that!

I'll join the club. About once every 4 years would be about right.

I hate the WASTE, the tat, the mindless spending and hauls and shite from Temu and Shein and Amazon. Gifts bought out of obligation, not because someone needs/wants that particular thing. All the shite like elf on the shelf, santa trains, north pole breakfasts and the rest of the shite designed to make parents - well, mums really - feel crap and guilty for not buying into it.

The fecking awful light display on my neighbour's hedge.

The music - don't get me started on the music. The same shitty pop songs for 50 fucking years. Just go away, Noddy Holder and take Shaking Stevens with you.

What I hate most is that people lose all ability to talk/think about anything else. And there are even people who start the build-up around February.

I hate it too.

Every year I’m pretty much forced to host and cook a massive meal, organise gifts for everyone, sort out sleeping arrangements and buy all of the food.

This year I LTB and my parents aren’t speaking to me so I’m not doing any of it.

The relief is insane.

I’m working Christmas Day and Boxing Day and I’m perfectly happy with that decision.

When you put it like that it does sound fucking dreadful. I’m glad that while my Christmas isn’t perfect it isn’t as shit as that. The key is compromise. If people refuse to do that then that’s a problem for them. Just don’t engage and do things you want to do the way you want to do them. I will never understand people (like my MIL for example, who I love btw) martyring themselves because otherwise certain people will be “upset”.

YABU

Make it what you want it.

Get a grip, OP! Who’s in charge here?? Take back control and start calling the shots, for pity’s sake!