Page 16 | That prayer to Jesus is inappropriate at a company party?

Kate8889 · 2025-12-06T12:06:36+00:00

I went with my husband to a company Christmas party and before we started to eat a woman came to the microphone and said a short prayer in the name of Jesus as thanks/blessings for the food. Everyone was expected to bow their head. This is the first time I've been witness to something like this, it is a secular company with many Jewish, Muslim and agnostic people. We have been going to this Christmas party for 7 years and it's never been like this.

GeneralPeter · 06/12/2025 13:32

BillieWiper · 06/12/2025 13:25

Well yes if there were lots of faiths. A works Xmas do isn't celebrating Christmas as the birth of Christ. It's just a secular holiday for everyone, and the party is to thank staff for their work over the year. So either include all or don't bother.

I'd prefer they didn't have anyone saying any prayers or anything.

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I think that’s where you and I differ. I think it is a secular holiday for everyone but I don’t think it’s just that. It’s also a religious holiday, for a reasonable number of people.

I guess I think that the quid pro quo is that if a (secular) company wants to have a Christmas do (not just an end of year do) then that’s fine. But then objecting to Christians who want to mark its Christian nature too is a bit off.

Purplevelvets · 06/12/2025 13:32

Bambamhoohoo · 06/12/2025 12:49

I would be offended if a Muslim preyed at me, yes. Luckily it wouldn’t happen.

the main point is a work Xmas party is (despite the reaching on here) undoubtedly a secular event. It was inappropriate

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No one is going to pray at you, ever.

Hopefully if someone of any religion wanted to share a prayer with you and you didn't want to participate, you'd sit respectfully quiet while they got on with it for a moment.

Regardless, if you don't believe in prayer it was just a moment to be thankful for the food. Surely no one can object to that.

HoppityBun · 06/12/2025 13:32

Spookyspaghetti · 06/12/2025 13:24

Christmas is not a season. Winter is a season.

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You are misunderstanding and unnecessarily limiting the meaning of the word. It has applications further and outside meteorological ones. Sports, television and horticulture come to mind.

SwedishEdith · 06/12/2025 13:31

It's bonkers. I'd assume they'd been on some sort of Alpha course. Certainly wouldn't have bowed my head and would have enjoyed the "WTF was that about?" conversations afterwards. I would assume someone would have a private word with them later in the office and it wouldn't happen the next year.

YourOliveBalonz · 06/12/2025 13:29

FKAT · 06/12/2025 13:17

It's a Christmas Party. If you don't want CHRIST mentioned go to a Winter Celebration or Festive Season gathering or whatever.

If there was a work Eid celebration you'd expect Muslim references. If you went to an International Men's Day work event you'd expect men mentioned and not women. Same here.

That’s probably where it will have to go in terms of naming it, if people are so insistent it has to be about CHRIST. And then they will have the usual suspects outraged that ‘Christmas’ is being removed from everything.

It is genuinely fascinating to me that people think because Christmas has a specific meaning in Christianity, that they get to dictate what ‘Christmas’ means in the wider cultural sense. If the majority of people were to answer ‘what does Christmas mean to you’ with ‘time off work, watching Christmas films (also not about Jesus but that’s another tangent) and stuffing my face with family - maybe having some drinks with colleagues at the end of the year before we go on leave’ then you putting your fingers in your ear and saying NO IT IS ABOUT JESUS is not going to change that.

You keep Christmas in your own way, and let me keep it in mine ;)

Frazzled89 · 06/12/2025 13:26

dudsville · 06/12/2025 12:45

I agree with these points. I feel really very comfortable celebrating christmas as a winter festival, as an athiest. But also, OP, I come from a very religious family (so religious in their christianity that they don't celebrate christmas) and whenever they pray, I don't bow my head or even close my eyes. I listen to and look at the one doing the prayer, and am just thinking about the message they're giving in the method they feel most accurately communicates that.

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Jehovah's Witnesses?

BillieWiper · 06/12/2025 13:25

GeneralPeter · 06/12/2025 13:20

Even at a Christmas do? If it were a work Eid or Diwali do, would you expect all faiths to be invited to say or do something?

I do recognise that Christmas has a dual nature (Christian/secular) that the others don’t. But I think that’s satisfied by making clear no one is expected to participate in prayer. Just staying silent is fairly standard protocol. I’m an atheist and have stayed silent through many religious bits and pieces: I’ve never felt I should be invited to give them my views on god to balance it out a bit.

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Well yes if there were lots of faiths. A works Xmas do isn't celebrating Christmas as the birth of Christ. It's just a secular holiday for everyone, and the party is to thank staff for their work over the year. So either include all or don't bother.

I'd prefer they didn't have anyone saying any prayers or anything.

Renamed · 06/12/2025 13:25

Extremely odd

Spookyspaghetti · 06/12/2025 13:24

HoppityBun · 06/12/2025 12:19

No, a Christmas party it isn’t a celebration of the birth of Jesus! Christmas is a season and has been for hundreds of years. Anyone can be religious and devote themselves to celebrate the birth of Christ if they so wish but that’s a private matter for them. A party is a party. Currently the name that everyone uses at this time of year is “Christmas” but that doesn’t mean that they are obliged either to celebrate the birth of Christ or to hold a mass. Nor do they have to be Christian.

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Christmas is not a season. Winter is a season.

Deadlykitten · 06/12/2025 13:23

You do understand what Christmas is, right?

Figcherry · 06/12/2025 13:23

Threewordname · 06/12/2025 13:12

The word "Christmas" comes from Christianity but the date has nothing to with Christianity. There were pagan festivals at that time of year to celebrate the winter solstice long before Jesus was born. Nowadays "Christmas" is often used just to signify the time of year, and very few Christmas parties or events refer to Jesus at all (church services and school nativity plays excepted!)

In an openly Christian organisation a prayer to Jesus would of course be fine, but otherwise I as a non-Christian would find it alienating. It implies that non-Christian employees are less important outsiders. I’d be very surprised if an HR department approved it.

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You really think that bowing your head and listening to a prayer for a minute at Christmas time is alienating?

I'm a lapsed Catholic and just listen politely when with family, it's not hard.

Marieb19 · 06/12/2025 13:21

Saying "Grace" is quite common at events, although most are made with a secular tone.

Parker231 · 06/12/2025 13:21

40andlovelife · 06/12/2025 12:11

But a Christmas party is esssntially a celebration of the birth of Jesus. Why is it inappropriate to honour his birth at a party in his name?

Because not everyone who celebrates Christmas is a Christian.

GeneralPeter · 06/12/2025 13:20

BillieWiper · 06/12/2025 13:14

That is weird. I'm presuming she just said she wanted to say a few words, they handed her the mic and she went for it. Rather than it being an ingrained part of company culture.

If they are having this then they should make a point of asking people who follow other faiths if they want to say something or do something religious relating to mealtimes.

It should be all or nothing. Or it could seem discriminatory.

Even at a Christmas do? If it were a work Eid or Diwali do, would you expect all faiths to be invited to say or do something?

I do recognise that Christmas has a dual nature (Christian/secular) that the others don’t. But I think that’s satisfied by making clear no one is expected to participate in prayer. Just staying silent is fairly standard protocol. I’m an atheist and have stayed silent through many religious bits and pieces: I’ve never felt I should be invited to give them my views on god to balance it out a bit.

OutwiththeOutCrowd · 06/12/2025 13:20

The use of the term 'Christmas Party' can be a source of confusion. I think rebranding as a 'Yuletide Party' might be sensible and give everyone a chance to celebrate together the dark mystery of the season, without feeling excluded by not belonging to the 'right' religion.

LimpysGotCancer · 06/12/2025 13:20

40andlovelife · 06/12/2025 12:11

But a Christmas party is esssntially a celebration of the birth of Jesus. Why is it inappropriate to honour his birth at a party in his name?

40andlovelife · Today 12:11

But a Christmas party is esssntially a celebration of the birth of Jesus
No it's not.

usedtobeaylis · 06/12/2025 13:19

People get sticks up their arses about the most nonsense things.

Zov · 06/12/2025 13:19

FKAT · 06/12/2025 13:17

It's a Christmas Party. If you don't want CHRIST mentioned go to a Winter Celebration or Festive Season gathering or whatever.

If there was a work Eid celebration you'd expect Muslim references. If you went to an International Men's Day work event you'd expect men mentioned and not women. Same here.

Exactly!

usedtobeaylis · 06/12/2025 13:19

Threewordname · 06/12/2025 13:12

The word "Christmas" comes from Christianity but the date has nothing to with Christianity. There were pagan festivals at that time of year to celebrate the winter solstice long before Jesus was born. Nowadays "Christmas" is often used just to signify the time of year, and very few Christmas parties or events refer to Jesus at all (church services and school nativity plays excepted!)

In an openly Christian organisation a prayer to Jesus would of course be fine, but otherwise I as a non-Christian would find it alienating. It implies that non-Christian employees are less important outsiders. I’d be very surprised if an HR department approved it.

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I'm not Christian and I wouldn't and don't find it alienating, or think that people consider me some kind of lesser mortal, just because someone wanted to say a wee prayer.

madroid · 06/12/2025 13:18

Why are people so eager to be offended or find something to complain about?

Bet the OP was a bundle of laughs at the party. NOT

Zov · 06/12/2025 13:18

It's a CHRISTMAS party. Of course it's OK. Many posters on MN will disagree of course, and give a dozen vapid and hollow reasons why........ 🙄

JillyJoy · 06/12/2025 13:18

If this happened at an American Company Party I would not be surprised at all. Many Americans give thanks before a meal, until about 1970s many used to say a Grace in a public restaurant.
That was their tradition, it has changed.

pikkumyy77 · 06/12/2025 13:17

Applecup · 06/12/2025 13:04

I think the clue is in the word Christmas. It is a Christian festival. Just as it would be appropriate to pray to the God of Judaism for Hanukkah and the appropriate Deities for Diwali.

Edited

Unaware that the god of judaism (sic) is the same as the god of christianism?

ThreeSixtyTwo · 06/12/2025 13:17

At the current climate, especially with what is happening in the US, it sounds as highly political and indeed offending move.

Christmas are old winter festival appropriated by Christian church, so the connection to Jesus is a kind of colonial at best anyway.

FKAT · 06/12/2025 13:17

It's a Christmas Party. If you don't want CHRIST mentioned go to a Winter Celebration or Festive Season gathering or whatever.

If there was a work Eid celebration you'd expect Muslim references. If you went to an International Men's Day work event you'd expect men mentioned and not women. Same here.