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AIBU?

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Drunk mates staying over

92 replies

ZippyBlueViper · 06/12/2025 08:56

Last night oh turned up at 1am with 2 other men all really drunk. One of them i know a little bit and the other i had never met before.
We have 3 kids, 14, 5 and 5 month old.
Oh said they're staying over. I said no they're not.
The one that i know a little bit stayed over after a night out last week and eldest dd said she felt uncomfortable when she came down to breakfast and there was just a random man there.
The week before that another of his mates stayed over who i do know really well and kids know him but he was that drunk he wet the bed and was all left for me to clean up.
I put my foot down last night and said they absolutely were not staying over. I don't feel comfortable with it and it's not a doss house where every drunk idiot can use it as a hotel.
Oh thinks I'm being ridiculous and unfair. I think I'm just protecting myself and the kids?

OP posts:
rainbowstardrops · 06/12/2025 09:56

I’d have suggested he left along with his drunk mates!
Your house is not a drop in centre FFS.
Is he usually this awful?

ThejoyofNC · 06/12/2025 09:53

He's taking the piss and I'd have kicked him out along with his mates.

Why is he going out and coming home drunk with fellow drunkards in tow, every weekend when you have a baby?

Lobleylimlam · 06/12/2025 09:49

Why on earth are they not going home why would they need to stay over, they are grown men? What is wrong with your husband he sounds like a teenager!

Sounds like he has no respect for you as youve said no and it keeps happening. If he was going out again i'd be leaving the door locked, key in door. He can have a sleepover at his mates house for once!

Him and his friend should be mortified, so drunk theyre pissing the bed? I'd not be able to look at my husband the same way again.

BlueMum16 · 06/12/2025 09:31

YANBU.
Your H is selfish and putting himself and mates before family.

DoBeGoodDontBeBad · 06/12/2025 09:23

They are grown men. Why can't they just go the fuck home?

When I first opened this I thought it was going to be about teenage kids.

Wellstonethecrows · 06/12/2025 09:21

Your H seems intent on turning your home into a doss house OP.

It sounds as though he has a real drink problem if going out and getting drunk is his normal behaviour. And like a lot of drunks he is mixing with those with similar problems.

He has no respect for you, for his children, or for for his home.

He has no concern for the safety of his children. Or for that matter your safety. Or the safety of his home.

I think you need to have a serious discussion about his drinking. And the fact he cannot offer open house to the local drunks. If he won't address these issues I would be looking at at least a temporary separation.

Cinai · 06/12/2025 09:18

Your OH should start behaving like a dad. He’s not a teenager anymore, that’s really embarrassing behaviour for a grown man.

jaynelou5 · 06/12/2025 09:17

You are a family home not a student house! Sounds like dad needs to stop drinking & putting his children at risk & walking all over you.

KimberleyClark · 06/12/2025 09:16

Your oh is an arsehole, sorry, and so are his mates. He’s still behaving like he’s single. Your children should never have to come down to strange men in the kitchen!

And who the fuck thinks you are being unreasonable?

Zellie1027 · 06/12/2025 09:15

Absolutely not being unreasonable! There’s no way I’d have near enough strangers staying in my house with my children there. Especially if one of my children had said they felt uncomfortable last time!
Personally I wouldn’t be happy with my husband going out and getting so drunk when I was home alone with 3 children anyway, especially one as young as 5 months old. That would be quite a big boundary for me but I appreciate not everyone will feel the same

IamnotSethRogan · 06/12/2025 09:11

Yeah it's definitely becoming too much of a habit !

The absolute fucking cheek to do this after you cleaned up someone's piss!

DoingAway · 06/12/2025 09:08

No yanbu at all op and peeing the bed is disgusting. They sound like the have problems with alcohol.

Elfie23 · 06/12/2025 09:07

So that’s three weeks in a row your OH has come back steaming drunk and expects his friends to stay over? I’d be telling the mates PLUS OH to sling their hook - what a pisstaker! Do you ever get to go out?

IsawwhatIsaw · 06/12/2025 09:04

I wouldnt be cleaning up after these drunken unwanted guests.
your H sounds selfish. What is he like generally?

Ilovemychocolate · 06/12/2025 09:04

Ridiculous!
Also why did you clean up the piss when it was your husbands mate that wet the bed?

GeorgeClooneyshouldhavemarriedme · 06/12/2025 09:01

YANBU

That is outrageous behaviour from your OH

ComfortFoodCafe · 06/12/2025 08:57

Nope, yanbu. He should of told them to get a taxi home!

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