over a bloody booster seat 🥵

Where my children's safety is at risk, then yes it is a hill to die on!
My 10 yo DD is still in a high backed car seat/booster, as is my 8 yo DS. There's no dispute, even in someone else's car. They don't question it.....I'm possibly a little stricter than their dad about car seats but that's just life sometimes.
I also deal with my children being rude to me and trying to wear me down to get their own way.
So 2 issues here 1 is your DDs rudeness, the other is them understanding why safety rules are there.

I’d let go this time.

My DGC are aged 3 to 9. In my car the eldest uses an appropriate high back booster, and was rear -facing until almost 5. His parents had him forward facing by 18 months and using the adult seat belt, no booster, at 7. They know my opinion but I can only control what happens when DGC are travelling in my own car.

I'd personally take a chance at 9 years old, life is full of risk, and sometimes for your own sanity (and to save your child's embarrassment) you take a risk / break the rules.

My mum is just shy of 5 foot she often says she'd like a booster seat! Children's ones aren't wide enough to be comfortable for an adult

You sound like a great mum OP. Keep advocating for your girl and helping her make good choices. One day she will be away from these people. Hopefully she can have a kinder friendship group in secondary school.

I agree with this

@StarDolphins if you were the driver what would your stance be?

Jeeze. I'd need a booster seat, then. That could make driving tricky.

My neighbour has a 5yo same as mine and frequently drives with him in the front passenger seat and no car seat to be seen.

You can't trust other people.

I'm not disputing it, I'm belittling it. I'd adhere to it regardless because it's the law. I don't have to like it or agree with it, I'd just do it to not break the law. A bit like going to work and paying taxes.

I get where you are coming from OP as a safety conscious person myself. I tell myself: The most important safety factor is:
the driver
other drivers
road conditions

IF they crash the most important safety factor is seatbelt and airbags.

Is then driver a teenage boy (sorry, just stats)? Have you checked the tyre pressure? The tread? the road conditions?
im not trying to be snarky it’s just that the hugest implication for safety isn’t the car seat. If she was a toddler and could be hurt by a prang then, maybe as a prang is more likely.

She will still be safe on a UK road in a roadworthy car with a competent driver. The chances of a crash are very low.

I believe that if they are under the legal height and there is an accident that the insurance is invalid and the driver would be liable. Whilst this is something at nine she will struggle to understand, it is just something to bear in mind.

Ffs don't be that parent.

UABU to ask MN where most people have no idea about car safety. An hour trip is presumably on the motorway, even if friends parent is a great driver other people on the road aren’t. You are completely right to do everything you can to keep you own child safe and well regardless of what others are doing and of what people say online. Do you think the ride attendant at a theme park would let an under height child on an adult ride because it was ‘just a one off.’

I’m wondering how many of the posters saying the OP is being ridiculous would be blaming her if she had posted that her daughter had been injured whilst not in a booster seat, but she is only 1cm under the legal limit?

DD2 had a booster for way longer than everyone else, it is not my fault she is short. She should eat more vegetables 😅

The worst thing is that our neighbour has heated seats in the BACK but obviously on a booster seat there was no benefit for her. She has never let me forget that.

IT'S THE LAW!! And for very good reasons too. You can't just ignore the law because it suits you or your brat of a child!

You don’t think? Perhaps you should go find out before making such wild claims.

I am so dismayed by some of these responses and the attitudes being shown towards safety and also by how OP describes the other girls and parents at her school. My daughter is the same age and some of them need boosters, some don’t, depending on height. They wouldn’t be teased for needing them. If they have been telling her that she’s a baby because she’s slightly shorter then I would be speaking to the school. I’m sorry your daughter is in this friendship group OP.

It's one of those unfortunate things of being small, it also happens that you can't go on rides at places like Alton Towers too if you are small for age.

@YorkshireGoldDrinker you are disputing a safety issue.

Didn’t have seat belts in the back of cars when I was a child, should I be mind blown that we have them now.

Wonder how many posters would cope if driving in other countries that have 150cm limit. Also at what point would you say OP’s DD would have had to use booster seat in a scenario where all other children were over 135cm. 2cm, 3cm, 4cm under the limit?