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AIBU?

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Original poster

Ski trip cost- are we subsidizing “host “ family

384 replies

Moknicker · 05/12/2025 02:58

Wanted to get a sense check on how a family has asked us to split costs for an upcoming ski trip

  • One family (2 adults + 2 kids) is going on the trip.
  • Four additional children (each from separate families) were invited to join. Our child is one of these - is friends with younger child. Kids are 17 and 15 year olds
  • Total people on the trip: 8
  • 4 from the host family.
  • 4 individual children

Shared costs:

  • Accommodation: 4k total
  • Ski lift pass: 7 at 300 each = 2100 ( mum is not skiing)
  • Total cost: 6100

The host family just told us the cost is 1640 for our son. I asked for the breakdown( we were only given total figure). It looks like they have added up the costs and divided by 5

Aibu to say this is not fair and our cost is around 1050( accommodation divided by 8 and we pay 300 for ski lift ) and we and the other kids should not be subsidizing the “host” family? And if we are then they should have told us beforehand?

Travel costs and other costs are covered individually.

OP posts:
NetZeroZealot · 05/12/2025 08:12

The lift passes sound cheap.
You will also need to budget €20 a day for lunch on the slopes, unless they are planning to take a packed lunch. Skiing had become very expensive!

blastfurnace · 05/12/2025 08:09

My guess here is that OP has been sent details of the accommodation so knows how much that is costing, has looked up the cost of a lift pass, booked their own flights and is expecting to send spending money.

I’m guessing she is not thinking about transfers, equipment hire and lessons which, when added onto a fair split of the accommodation + lift pass, could easily add up to the figure quoted.

ForPlumReader · 05/12/2025 08:09

Firstly, I think that it is very good of anyone to offer to take additional children on a ski holiday. I might do it for a beach holiday but definitely wouldn't want the responsibility of others on a ski holiday. I doubt anyone willing to do that is out to fleece you.

Secondly, ski holidays are really expensive so I would assume that there are things they have not included in the breakdown - ski hire, lessons, lunch, drinks, transport etc.

ony123 · 05/12/2025 08:08

Are there 2 other children from the same family going? I wonder if you were just sent the amount for 2 children, rather than 1.

Needspaceforlego · 05/12/2025 08:05

ThejoyofNC · 05/12/2025 08:00

"Hi, can you send me a breakdown of the cost please as it's significantly different to what I was expecting based on the quotes you gave for accommodation and ski lift?"

I like that reply. Then you can make an informed choice.

I would still have concerns over ski abilities and stuff but asking politely for the cost break down isnt a bad idea

ThejoyofNC · 05/12/2025 08:00

"Hi, can you send me a breakdown of the cost please as it's significantly different to what I was expecting based on the quotes you gave for accommodation and ski lift?"

blastfurnace · 05/12/2025 07:58

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 05/12/2025 07:52

is the £4K accomodation cost definitely for 8 of them? When DS and friends were taken away by his friend’s parents they were in two different apartments. Funnily enough, the cost aside, it was an almost identical situation, including the ages and non-skiing mum!

I’d politely ask for a bit more of a break down of costs and what the amount includes, explain that it’s a bit more than you thought it’d be based on info shared but maybe it’s covering some costs you hadn’t included.

Edited

Even if it were £4000k just for the guests + a lift pass that’s £1300 each not £1640.

CautiousLurker2 · 05/12/2025 07:57

Whilst you’ll be paying for the flights, does their quote include the transfer from the airport (that was quite steep when my DH took the kids last year - and you would be looking at a mini bus for 8 passengers and gear?) plus food/drinks at £30-40 a day (DH also found most of the restaurants exorbitant the last few times he took them, as my youngest is 6ft 3 and won’t just have a sandwich or a kids meal anymore), then there is the end of tenancy chalet cleaning charge, another way for the rental company to fleece clients.

Like other PP’s suggest, I would just as for a break down of what is included in that total so that you can see what you are paying for. You can say you need to know so that you can work out what all the additional costs might be.

I’d also, then, think hard about whether I want to ruin this relationship for my DS even if it turns out you might be overpaying a little. The parents are taking on the legal responsibility for your child when they are there and he is getting an awesome trip with his mates. Is that worth quibbling over £2-300?

Mydadsbirthday · 05/12/2025 07:57

I think you need more info. Also, I wouldn't be allowing my teen to ski with 5 other teens supervised only by one skiing adult. Are they very good skiers or are they going to be with an instructor?

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 05/12/2025 07:56

What about food drinks etc are you giving separate money for that? Ask for a breakdown to show how much for accomodation, ski pass food/ extras etc

amber763 · 05/12/2025 07:56

PluckyChancer · 05/12/2025 07:47

I don’t see the problem with them asking you to subsidise their holiday as they’re taking responsibility for your child as well as theirs, plus the added travel costs, food, extras…?

You’d have to pay all of that yourself if you were taking your own kids on holiday. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Whaaaat? Don't be daft. Who would even dream of doing this??

oneinataxioneinacar · 05/12/2025 07:55

Fends · 05/12/2025 07:51

Why “very very gently”? I would be less of a wet wipe and tell them I’m not paying for their ski trip the cheeky fuckers 😆

Show quote history

Because its possible there are elements of costs op hasnt factored in!

blastfurnace · 05/12/2025 07:54

There’s no reasonable way that a split of £4000 accommodation + a lift pass cost £1640

Even if the host family are paying nothing at all and they are offloading it all onto the guests (which would be mad) it adds up to significantly less.

Either they are:

a) factoring in some of the additional costs like travel, ski hire, lessons, food (which you are assuming aren’t included in their calculations)
b) their maths is very wrong or
c) they are elite-level CFers.

Probably option A but you never know.

ISpyNoPlumPie · 05/12/2025 07:52

PluckyChancer · 05/12/2025 07:47

I don’t see the problem with them asking you to subsidise their holiday as they’re taking responsibility for your child as well as theirs, plus the added travel costs, food, extras…?

You’d have to pay all of that yourself if you were taking your own kids on holiday. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Do you charge for play dates, sleepovers, birthday parties?

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 05/12/2025 07:52

is the £4K accomodation cost definitely for 8 of them? When DS and friends were taken away by his friend’s parents they were in two different apartments. Funnily enough, the cost aside, it was an almost identical situation, including the ages and non-skiing mum!

I’d politely ask for a bit more of a break down of costs and what the amount includes, explain that it’s a bit more than you thought it’d be based on info shared but maybe it’s covering some costs you hadn’t included.

RendeersDancingTowardsChristmas · 05/12/2025 07:51

Are Travel & Food costs separate?

I think OP has every right to ask for a breakdown.

Fends · 05/12/2025 07:51

Looociee · 05/12/2025 03:13

I would question this but very very gently. Agree with pp - what about travel?

Why “very very gently”? I would be less of a wet wipe and tell them I’m not paying for their ski trip the cheeky fuckers 😆

ISpyNoPlumPie · 05/12/2025 07:49

Do people really invite their kid’s friends on holiday and charge for childcare??? As for the mum being the “chalet girl”…well that’s pretty unquantifiable. Wouldn’t the adults be doing that stuff anyway for their own children? Are they hosting or running a business? I wouldn’t be happy with this at all. Hope you haven’t paid them any money yet OP. I’d definitely need more information.

PluckyChancer · 05/12/2025 07:47

I don’t see the problem with them asking you to subsidise their holiday as they’re taking responsibility for your child as well as theirs, plus the added travel costs, food, extras…?

You’d have to pay all of that yourself if you were taking your own kids on holiday. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Highlighta · 05/12/2025 07:44

No the maths does not work out, so you will need to get a breakdown.

My thoughts are:
800 for the accommodation and lift costs
860 for child care

It also depends on your relationship with the parents, and your dc relationship with their dc, as to whether you just suck it up and pay them what they ask.

Squishedpassenger · 05/12/2025 07:35

Maybe pocket money too. One mum in kid's school took another kid on a package holiday summer just gone. She actually paid for the flights and accommodation as the deal meant that another child could come extremely cheaply. That child didnt bring a penny for pocket money so the mum had to completely cover everything they did outside of the hotel. She just assumed the mum would send some money and was expecting her to speak about it on the day they left for the flight. By the time they landed, she was aware that the child didn't have a single penny.

Ultravox · 05/12/2025 07:33

I’m organising a similar trip and have provided a complete breakdown of costs to the parents of the teens we are taking for flights, accommodation, transfers, lift pass & ski hire. It’s all worked out pp so we as a family of 4 are paying 4/6 and the 2 teens are paying 1/6 each.

It’s an awkward situation that these parents haven’t provided that! Id definitely ask where the additional costs are coming from.

Duechristmas · 05/12/2025 07:28

It wouldn't be unreasonable to ask them for a breakdown. I expect food and other expenditures are included there.

Mayflower282 · 05/12/2025 07:26

You haven’t included flights, ski hire, food, transfers, apres activities. I think it’s okay to check what’s included in the price with your friend, but be careful how you go about it and come from a place of “just want to check” rather than “why are you charging me this”.

chunkyBoo · 05/12/2025 07:25

What about travel and food?