What is reasonable. DS 25 going solo travelling.

My mum still tells me to be careful driving home, and if I say I'm going on a night out I get a full safety briefing. I am a fully grown adult with my own teenager! Mums worry.

Maybe create a group chat named for the trip and ask him to update you there when he can.

So basically instead of managing your own anxiety, you dump the onus on him to manage it from afar. That is SO unfair and so counter to what an adventurous overseas experience should be. Tied to mum's apron strings and guilty because she's worrying.

People need to manage their own fears, not make others jump through hoops to do so. Yes, I know, it takes two minutes to send a text. It'snot the two minutes, it's the constant onus, expectation and obligation hanging over one's head.

Whatever contact he wants. He’s 24 years old!

I'd assume a Nintendo DS doesn't need solo travel. It will most likely get stolen.

Think some posters are being unkind. The OP is just asking for advice. She's understandably concerned as its a first solo trip in not the easiest of countries at times. Also people are different in different situations. Her DS might not be that streetwise etc. It doesn't matter whether they're male or female either. The risks are still there. I think she was just pointing out that part of the trip cost was a gift to say that she was behind him/all for him going away.

Some posters have actualy suggested asking him to use a tracking device or app.

You are one of those dicks!

In this day and age I’d expect/ hope
for a WhatsApp with a nice picture every day or two at least

He's TWENTY FIVE.

At 25 I would largely rely on whatever pictures he posted. Be clear you will be there whenever he fancies a chat. My key focus would be on making sure he had the correct insurance cover and that it was really good. I am a travel insurer by trade and backpacking for a long period has to be specifically purchased. It is not vastly expensive assuming he has no existing conditions, but it is worth purchasing a decent policy.

When I was 25 I travelled extensively and I had been married for 2 years, 25 was considered mature in those days! Of course you never stop worrying about them but by the time they are in their mid 20's they should hopefully have enough life skills to organise who, when and how often they check in with somone.

I would ask my son to reply to my messages as proof of life, for the simple reason that I would worry. And I would 100% remind him about the dangers of methanol poisoning. He might roll his eyes and think it unnecessary, but he would humour me.

My DS went travelling around Asia at 19 and whilst we didn't have a set rule, I did say that hopefully he'll share photos and any SM updates but worse case, please just check in once a week so I know you haven't been kidnapped/killed/arrested or lying by the side of the road somewhere.

It's terrifying but I do think as adults they need to be afforded some freedom and independence including making decisions on their own and it's very hard to do that if you're on the phone to mum and dad constantly as he'll inevitably default to asking your opinion or for guidance.

I was travelling all round the world at 25 and I don't think my parents usually knew whether I was even travelling or not.

He can check in as often as he likes, or never.

When I backpacked at 21, I tried to check in with my parents every other week for a proper chat via Skype. Outside of that, I texted or emailed each time I moved to a new location so they knew where I was.

My DS went to China and Japan this year, he was 20, he did a new instagram account which he put photos on, which I followed and he asked if we could do the find a phone thing just for his peace of mind. He text me probably twice a week and facetimed me once so we could see Mount Fuji.
It was all led by him.

What's reasonable is whatever he, a fully grown adult, wants to do. You've no right to updates or check ins, and certainly no right to tracking him as others have suggested.

Maybe because she thinks you are an unfledged young adult.

Every few days. I went travelling (actually lived and worked) in Asia at the same age for a year. I probably emailed my mum once a week and she’d call me maybe once or twice a month for a chat.

Fitting him with a tracker has been suggested though, putting something in his luggage.

What happens if he gets married and decides to live in a hut in a part of the Amazon forest untouched by man, Will she still expect him to check in.

I see trouble ahead-what wife would want to put up with that.

It’s a conversation. She’s not fitting him with a tracker…

Once a week wouldn’t be unreasonable to hear from him. Text or call. But this isn’t something you can insist on.
It makes no difference at all who’s paid for the trip, not sure why you think it would. I think you need to start thinking of your son as an adult man rather than a ‘youngster’.