That bloody school is make life hard at this time of year

I bloody hope not.

My son’s school is specifically for children with complex needs, autism, and challenging behaviour.

If they’re testing my stress levels by sending me a new piece of paper with a date/some information on, when they know my shouty kid spends his evenings pooing on the carpet, they can fuck all the way off.

Stress test - failed!

I mean whose bright Idea was colour coordinated raffle hampers!
Buy a Christmas jumper, buy a hamper prize donation so they get to wear the Christmas jumper, buy raffle tickets for hamper - so paying several times over for one fundraiser.

I was a teacher in Primary schools for 20 years. We used to hate all the endless extra workload in December. The children were knackered and frequently sent in when they were ill so we'd get it too , be ill for the Christmas holidays and then come back on the 4th ready to catch the next germ). The push to do all the things ( nativity, panto, carol service , party blah blah) came from the top. If you pushed back and suggested slimming it down a bit you'd get a bollocking in front of the rest of the staff. So you just went along with it . Parents are shattered, teachers and children are shattered and full of germs. The first Christmas after I changed to a different job my son said " we actually had Christmas this year mum. It was brilliant".

I always hated this. They never give you any real notice and just expect you to be sat waiting for updates and changes.

That's outrageous! Is it a state school? I think they have an obligation to have the kids a certain number of hours a year?

I forgot to mention the bloody thing started at 10am in the morning (buried the lead there. Sorry!).

My issue isn't that they are doing so much. I'm happy for them to do all these lovely events, and I will.support as many as I can, and manage my kids expectations accordingly when i can't. I just want the communication to be more joined up and cohesive, and it to be easier to find the info I need. Schools seem to subscribe to the train of thought that the more communication the better, but actually concise, structured communications are so much better than having it fired at you like its being sprayed from a shotgun.

If it’s any consolation, I’m a TA and my children’s school and I can’t keep up either.

That’s not how comms works

I’m struggling too - lots of us work full time stressful jobs, I can’t cope with the extra workload!

Yes that's pretty ridiculous RE: the nativity sending home. One day if they performed it at 2 I'd understand!

We have two random inset days in May and June on Fridays which is lovely BUT I'm of course teaching that day!

DS has one nativity performance at 2.15- costume provided! So it does vary school to school.

We can’t win as school staff. Some want everything, some want nothing. Most want a balance in between.

this half term for primary school staff is stress central but we do it to make things special for the children. We are adding it all to the already stretched workload but we do it because the children love it. We may not get everything spot on but we are trying our best.

The thing is that half the parents will want these things/ complain when they don't happen and the other half will resent them.

But yes we've had three parent drop ins this term in reception and it's been a good thing I'm on mat leave as , as a teacher, I couldn't get time off. I would for a nativity but not for every random thing!

OP was complaining about pta donations and teacher presents though and that's just people trying to be generous/ helpful and can be ignored if needed.

I have a lot of sympathy for schools. I’ve worked in head office of a MAT, I know how hard teachers work and how under resourced they are.

But if it’s the case that someone complains whatever you do then schools need to select the most effective, efficient form of communication with clear, simple format and reasonably reliable frequency - something that will suit a majority, but definitely not all, parents - and stick to it consistently. Then let the minority complain and to hell with them.

What’s being described above is either:

• disorganisation and lack of coordination on the part of the school, or
• they’re trying to cover literally all bases with their communication and it’s confusing and leads to over-communication and inconsistency.

Exactly, it happens every year. So why make it such hard work?!

Before anyone jumps in and says that it’s not mandatory to attend/ fund these things - I know but I’ve been to enough of these events to see, despite teachers trying to distract them, just how upset some children are when other parents turn up and theirs doesn’t

Agree entirely. It’s not realistic to say “just don’t participate” - as soon as there is a school event, DC will want to participate and expect their parents to! However if the event didn’t exist, DC likely wouldn’t care…

I hate to criticise but since the start of the last school year the school my children go seems to have lost sight of the fact that the vast majority of parents work in some capacity, yet has doubled the number of invites to stay and plays etc and hugely increased the number of requests for sponsorship for various events and payment for trips, theatre visits, end of term discos etc
To say exactly what we’ve been invited to attend next week on top of the school fair, nativity, discos etc, would be outing as it’s so ludicrous, but let’s just say it’s the opening of something small funded in the main by parents providing money everyday for a relatively healthy (but unnecessary) snack provided by the school at break time.
Before anyone jumps in and says that it’s not mandatory to attend/ fund these things - I know but I’ve been to enough of these events to see, despite teachers trying to distract them, just how upset some children are when other parents turn up and theirs doesn’t
What I find most difficult is that the vast majority of teachers, including the head in our school, are working mums yet think it’s OK to send out all these invitations. Surely they must know the difficulty it causes parents when they are invited to attend things in working time
It might be controversial, but my view is that many of these in school hours events are not worth the additional workload they cause for teachers or the stress and upset they cause many parents and children.
Minipie - I’m one parent who wouldn’t complain at all. I know that all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy but teachers have plenty to do as it is. A classroom party for the children is enough in my opinion
.

The rubbish from the primary school was bad enough back in the early 2000s and that was before the advent of email. I can only imagine what it’s like now that everyone can be nagged at the stroke of a key. Sod that

And as teachers, we won't bother putting on a nativity, doing a carol service, Christmas lunch, party etc etc to make those magical primary school memories...whilst also juggling all the same shit that you are. We'll just attempt to do maths, English and all the usual lessons right up until the last day of term

YES PLEASE

I hear you.

We have 1 casual dress day per month- with a £2 donation to whatever charity it is that time. Then random other stuff. Then a compulsory 'volunteering' week in the summer term where the Dcs have to identify and participate in volunteering activities from 1-4 pm every afternoon. Most Dcs to be frank seem to 'volunteer' at their parents workplaces. Recently we had 'food bank' day where everyone brought in donations. Children In Need (£2 donation). Then a day last week where everyone was to wear odd coloured socks (£2 donation) in order to express support for neuro diversity. Today is the deadline for a chocolate and bottle donation for the Christmas fair. (Sorry, Fayre). Next week is Christmas jumper day (£ 2 donation) and Christmas lunch with further £2 donation to local food bank, plus information evening for those who might go to 6th form and parent teacher interviews (two consecutive nights) and then compulsory church service and christmas carols (next Thursday and Friday nights, you pick one or the other). For us it is 3 nights next week alone where we have to be physically present in the school from 5 pm-7.30.

I'm knackered just looking at the schedule.

@Bumblenums here to learn more about the xmas potato competition, please?

OP - yanbu at all. There is a tonne of it; it gets children into a complete hyped up frenzy because it's own clothes day one minute and paint the vicar the next; parents are hit with financial requests/demands from all fronts; and 90% of it feels completely avoidable.

The play was on two days so some parents weren't even attending as they couldn't get time off work for both days. It just shows a lack of understanding of working parents. If it's a half hour play people can pop out and go back to work. Sending them home after means parents need to take a whole day off.

I don't care when the training day is but having it in the same week as the nativity when you've already disrupted parents work with an unnecessary half day is not appreciated.

I love my DD's school. They don't do that much, for Christmas the only thing requiring parental input is Christmas dinner, and on the last day before the holiday it is 'Christmas dress up day', for which my daughter will wear the same festive headband for the third year running. There is a craft session which parents can attend, but it's not mandatory and supplies are provided by the school.

Communications are in the form of 1 message on Friday afternoon which contains everything you need to know for the coming week.

Sorry, but the "Xmas potato competition" is making me howl 😆

I absolutely agree OP, im counting the days till the end of term- we've had 2 non uniform days where had to bring in drinks/food for fayre/raffle, make a christmas lantern, the xmas potato competition, there is dress up last day of term, make tags at home for the tree, costumes for the xmas play, bring in food for xmas party next week - and its actually not as bad this year as both kids are at the same school!!!