To stop giving myself a hard time about the amount of TV my toddler is watching?

It’s probably too much but it’s not the end of the world, I doubt they’ll become a serial killer as a direct result.

Both my DC probably watch too much but as a couple of others have said I’m more relaxed as long as everything else is fine. For example DS is top part of the top sets for everything, plays sport 4 times a week and goes to scouts…seems like he’s doing ok. DD is tracking at exceeding for most things, ahead of progress in SATs, does gymnastics, dance/drama and Cubs…seems like she’s doing ok.

Sorry seen you do have a tonie box, just maybe try encouraging it a little more. I would get too worked up though, yes she’s probs having a little too much, but the world we live in now is full of screens, we are always on our phones? It’s everywhere. Maybe have a google of some activities and try to cut out one bit of screen time a day, could be the morning one colouring book at the table / play dough / sticker books) and then leave it at that, you’re doing your best we all are

I would really recommend a tonie box, and after lunch sit with her and read a book or two as quiet time. I have a 3 year old and 5 month old so i know the struggles. We do let our 3YO have tv but its limited. We do not allow youtube or any silly shows like that, its usually 1 or 2 episodes of pepper pig or a film (finding nemo/ sing / madagascar) then if he’s had a film that will be no more tv that day.
I also find colour books and sticker books really helpful! Baking is also good to pass time in the day

Ok, I do understand.

Another thing that works well for us is kids yoga, search Cosmic Kids on YouTube. She has special videos for toddlers and also content on age-appropriate mindfulness exercises. I feel at least if they’re moving their bodies when the TV is on, that’s something.

As someone with a PhD do you trust the peer-reviewed scientific research that finds screen time is harmful to the developing brains of young children?

My parents had to work a lot when we were younger

My grandma was looking after us so we watched what we wanted

We were glued to the tv

We all completed phds!!!!

I was first place in oxbridge

It did us no harm and I hate when others go to town about parents who have the tv on

Parenting is so bloody hard already

She does spend time with her - they go out and do activities everyday. Or are you choosing to ignore that bit in order to get a dig in?

I would suggest a Yoto, that's really helped us. My little girl has listened from about the age of two, we didn't let her control it herself and it's not a toy the way a Tonie is. But we noticed a dramatic difference in screen time usage once we introduced it. I actually wouldn't be beating yourself up about too much TV as long as you're also getting out and doing lots of activities etc, children need downtime too xx

I’m posting from a slightly different place as I went back to work full time at 4 months so I was never really a SAHM but I also have had the long days during the month of August for example when my childminder was off. My answer was to plan an outing in the morning and the afternoon. The outing could be going to the shops or the park, anything that got us out of the house. What with getting ready before and then the time it takes to sort everything out when you get back I found it could easily take a couple of hours out of my morning. Then in the afternoon we would do another activity, something like the library, or another playground or I had an annual pass to the local aquarium. And that would take up another large chunk of the day. Then all I needed to fill was the time in and around that and that was things like colouring, blocks, imaginary play, reading. I did often put children’s stories on my phone for her to listen to (not watch) when I needed some time out.

I will admit that it was not always easy and the days could sometimes drag but we never did any tv before two and even now at 5 she only gets limited screen time in the evening.

It’s definitely not easy though but going out saved my sanity to be honest.

I'm a teacher and honestly, i hate to admit that the smartest kids i have met watch far too much TV - but they are watching educational shows, and it really shows.

The kid is 2 - they are not known for their long attention spans. Just sayin'

Were up at 5am, I stick telly on so I can have a coffee and come around before work...I generally put a documentary or news on..they very quickly go to play with their toys 😅 tbf in mornings though as we are out the door early its not for long.

If im happy for them to watch a bit of telly at the weekend. I usually use less stimulating shows. (Cebeebies daydreams, some older kids shows its not as bright and loud in imagery) or nursery rhymes on YouTube to join in the movements with them, (its actually surprising how getting my body moving with it actually decompressed me 😂 )
My daughter is really sensitive and had a phase of non stop meltdowns, so had to turn everything down, even the level of our lighting, it had like a rebound effect where at the time you thought it distracted her, but it just brew to a bigger meltdown later.

So I guess my tip is, want to get them away from telly and playing without them thinking you've banned telly..put on a channel they dont want or get bored quickly with. Maybe location location location 😂

Wow so much hostility and totally unhelpful comments. OP ignore. You’re doing fine and are obviously a brilliant and caring parent. None of this will do any harm and some kids TV is very educational (baby shark phonics). Come better weather it will naturally reduce. We are all watching more TV in this rubbish weather.

If you don’t want to spend time with her doing things put her in a nursery where they will and go out to work instead.

Kids that age can be exhausting and sometimes a bit mind numbing, but they need interaction, not screens.

This,

“can’t be arsed” is no excuse. Organize your day better. You chose to take on the responsibility; live up to it.

If you’re ok with permanently damaging her brain wiring.

No one is forced to have children. If you choose to, don’t take the lazy way out. We all end up paying for that.

if she’s bored, get off your phone and talk with her.

The good thing about the established TV habit is you can use it as an incentive. Tidy up and we can watch TV, no TV until teddies back in the box, no TV until you eat lunch etc.

While I agree it's not ideal, TV in a common room is so much better than an IPad or phone at that age. I work with young children and many of them talk of waking to run into mummy's bed and watch things on her phone while she sleeps on or starts getting ready.

OP you honestly shouldn't give yourself a hard time - as long as she's watching something broadly educational, don't worry about it. It's not like you aren't giving them enriching activities to do at all.

I hated early mornings and 6am or before is early, I don't care what anyone says. I was relaxed about the TV, and the kids played with toys, crafts etc. but did watch TV when I needed a break. My kids are really intelligent, love reading, are funny and know so many facts, it doesn't seem to have adversely impacted them.

Lots of parents of current babies and toddlers will be on here chastising you, and when mine were young I would be crying about the judgement, however hindsight is that you do your best - TV is on for a few broken hours, who cares. As long as they arent watching horror, gore and other I appropriate stuff then no harm will come to them.

You're doing great.

I don’t think mine really watched TV until around 5 years old. They used to run everywhere and were into everything. But I’m a bit older with teens so notice the whole screen time now appears to have really gone earlier and earlier. I see so many tiny children on phones whilst parents are sat watching kids at activities in the evenings agh!

There were always too many other fun things to do than TV. We did playgroups and music groups and gyms and a swimming in the morning. Then if you are at home in afternoon why don’t you do more things with her? I know you do a morning activity but there are crafts, crayons, chalks, painting, baking, sensory play, big jigsaws, flicking through picture books, play houses with cups and saucers and teapots, dressing up, helping with chores, God so many things. Why TV? What is wrong with spending more time with her.
What about a day or half day in nursery
What on earth is a Tonie? I remember 2.5 was quite hard work but you do have to persevere. Maybe she has no concentration for the activities because 6/8 hours of TV a day hasn’t built the skills needed to focus for any length of time! TV is an entirely passive activity being fed to her- so she doesn’t get to use her imagine, be creative, solve simple problems, get frustrated and work something out. All important developmental skills needed for child development. Not to mention the sedentary nature. Come on!!

I always felt that it wasn't so much that screen time was in itself damaging, more that it took away from time doing more positive things. So as long as I felt there were plenty of positive activities going on I didn't worry too much aabout the TV being on. My children certainly are not intellectually backward (I can say with confidence since two are now adullts).

Also, not all screen time is equal. I believe some of the more dramatic claims are made based on research where children were watching rubbish/inappropriate stuff. A lot of the things on CBeebies was (I haven't watched it in years but I assume still is) very educational. My eldest was into arty crafty stuff and was often inspired to try and make things after seeing it on TV. My middle one learnt numbers from Numberjacks and letters from watching Alphablocks and started to read before starting school without me ever sitting them down specifically to teach them. My youngest loved Octonaughts and learnt all sorts from that.

Don't be too hard on yourself.

I think it’s important what you are doing while she’s watching tv. If you’re sitting scrolling your phone then yeah, not good. If you’re doing screen free activities (not just chores, could also be having a coffee while staring into space) then you’re modeling that ability to not be totally transfixed by passive media.

I also think there’s some great kids tv on YouTube and streaming, often better than cbeebies, especially short films, like the snowman, mogs Christmas, the Julia Donaldson stories. You can also find these in French and Spanish if you want to expose her to other languages. We have the books of these too which we read at night and often take out. She absolutely loves reading and role playing the stories with teddies, inventing new stories and songs with the characters. Mine (3) probably watches 2 hours a day (15 minutes in morning before nursery, up to an hour and a half in the evening. We do eat in front of the telly, but I always did as a kid and find it more relaxing. It’s a chance to do an activity together as a family but with less pressure, and we learn the nursery songs etc. with her that we wouldn’t have done in the adult world, so often sing them together too and dance around the kitchen.

Also mine has never liked playing by herself - she’s just kind of a clingy kid - so tv is the only way we get a break from playing or get to have a conversation as a couple.

Anyway, I don’t think it’s a massive issue if like you say it’s just a break for you during a difficult few months.

When my DD dropped her nap I found the best time to be outside was during the time she’d normally nap. Could change up your day and instead of going out in the morning have that be home play time, then go out right after lunch. I think kids play better in the mornings so make the most of that.

We'll have it on half an hour or so in the morning while I'm getting breakfast and organising clothes, mine are 4 and almost 8. Eldest is allowed his switch then too.

After school we generally do something. Park or trampolining or today we what an appt and went to Asda after then came home and they had a couple of hours because everyone was a bit fraught from the appointment and car journey.

Neither of mine are screen zombie type kids though. They watch something while chatting or playing a game with each other at the same time. Little one especially likes to snuggle on my knee and is happy to do that without TV and just chat or play.

I wouldn't beat yourself up butaybe set some specific boundaries? My eldest is ADHD and sometimes will start his day at 4am so has a no screens before 6am rule. That however is because if I start my day at 4 I need an hour's sleep before getting ready for work so I'll sleep 6-7 and honestly it's survival at that point.

At 2 though they both had very limited screens access, eldest it was a bit of tablet cartoon time to get him from a to b in his buggy as he hated it. He wasn't fussed on TV at home and wanted to be active most of the time. Youngest at 2 ot was whatever she saw that eldest was watching, she did like Disney nursery rhymes

It's fine. Cut yourself some slack. TV isn't the work of the Devil - there's lots of high quality, educational, entertaining stuff on there. My DD had loads of screen time - because I believe that watching well-made films is a good pastime for children, as long as there is also plenty of socialising and other activities in their lives. DD is now a highly qualified doctor - perhaps not because of screen time, but I am convinced that it was an important part of her education.