Would you be put off a nursery if it employed a man?

I’m in two minds. There was a young male at a nursery used by the 2 elder Gdcs for quite a while. Among other things he played the guitar and sang to them. Whether he ever changed nappies I don’t know - all other staff were women - but the Gdcs (G and B) both loved him.

Yes

Yes, viewed a nursery a few months ago. On the show around saw a male, around 40 yrs old, working alone in a toddler room. Confirmed with the manager and fairly quickly finished the show around and left.
They rang for feedback and I was honest. Said it may not be a very PC opinion but I’m not happy to accept the increased risk of unrelated males caring for my child, especially unsupervised. Sure he’s a lovely man etc etc.

I don’t care if I sound daft, it’s my baby and my choice to make. I voted with my feet.

Ive chosen a lovely nursery with no male staff currently. It won’t always be within my control if baby is settled somewhere and they employ a male later on but I think I’d feel comfortable requesting the male is not my child’s key person and that specific member of staff does not change my child’s nappy. The nursery can accept my request or decline in which case that’s my problem and I could go elsewhere or accept their decision.

Yes 100 percent

Yes exactly. No one is tracking their job history from one nursery to another here either. The staff turnover is so high anyway - it wouldn’t even stand out as unusual.

You can see from the lack of awareness on here that it’s as much to do with parents not realising the risks fully.
We see this in other areas of family life too.

Someone saying they would have no problem or issue with a male they don’t know that’s only just joined their nursery changing their baby’s nappy says it all.
Even a known male changing a nappy can be a serious risk. It’s like they are not aware of the various forms of depraved abuse that can and does happen to babies and toddlers.

It is very worrying.

There were 2 men at DC nursery, one still works there 8 years later, the other went on to university from memory.

DC loved the nursery nurses and a few weeks ago we were driving by nursery and he was putting some rubbish in the bins and waved at DC. They were very impressed he still remembered them and they talk of him fondly.

Said he felt uncomfortable and parents particularly dad’s were quite hostile at pick up. So he left. I mean if several parents are saying they don’t want him alone with the kids and he’s not allowed nappy changing or to be alone with the kids because parents have asked it makes it hard to work in that environment I guess.

On what grounds did the male member of staff leave?

Enough parents complained at a friend’s nursery and said staff member ended up leaving.

Male wasn’t allowed to change nappies or be alone with a number of kids because parents had requested it. So it just became difficult.

Women play football do we men disagree with it yes but they still do

Move her.

What would you have done if the nursery manager hired male staff after your DD had started nursery?

I think the problem is that pedo's always integrate themselves into situations where young DC are vulnerable. Nurseries are perfect settings for them to offend especially when the DC are very young and maybe not verbal.

I feel this way too. I wouldn't have sent my DD to a nursery that employed male staff.

I wouldn’t have an issue and didn’t. My son’s nursery his keyworker was male and he loved him. I’m a nurse myself and there’s wrong people in all walks of life but would massively feel unfair to exclude someone based on gender based on ‘what ifs’. I work with lots of male nurses and healthcare assistants who are amazing at what they do but do not mind if anyone objects to care and want female only

Not a problem for me at all. My ds has a male TA and he is brilliant. None of mine have ever had male nursery nurses but i have worked in nurseries with men working there.

99% of sex offenders are male. Hth.

Yes I would be put off by it.
The only male worker my son had, turned out to be a horrific pedo. Luckily my son was not one of his victims.
And these were older kids too, nothing to do with nappy changes.

I wouldn’t at all. Nurseries are understaffed and poorly managed over all for adequate safeguarding to be implemented that’s why you have a rise in CSA and everyone is wondering how? Pedophiles are predatory by nature and a nursery is the perfect setting for them. They are often very charming and disarming that’s why you have a bunch of comments saying ‘my dc had a male worker who was absolutely brilliant’ 🙄Well yes that is kind of the point isn’t it?

Socio economic situation in this country is diabolical because both parents have this to work so we are conditioned into normalising handing over our children to complete strangers for for 8 hours a day. We are further being conditioned into believing that this is normal and abuse is rare.

Sadly in this world... yes. It gives me peace of mind to negate the risk that men pose to children. That Australian study showing more men than I could have imagined admitting to being attracted to children doesn't ease my anxieties over this.

The nursery my two DDs attended had a male worker in the toddler room. He was absolutely brilliant: not only did my DCs love him but he put all the other staff to shame. Even now, at 8 and 5, they still ask about him and whether we know what he is up to.

The nursery went from Outstanding to Inadequate in all four categories the year that he left, and I do not think for one minute it was a coincidence.

I never sent my children to nursery but having man working there wouldnt bother me in the slightest.

Working with children myself, I don't see it to be any different to me (a female) changing a boys nappy.

@Eaglesforteaas someone who has kids at nursery and now knows the vibe of it all, no it wouldn't put me off.

This whole thing has bothered me so much - putting the absolute horror aside, I feel sad for our boys. This isn't doing anything for men who might want to take on a more "typically feminine" role in the future. If we ban all men working in nurseries I worry it might do a lot of damage

I think it’s just sad that we live in a world where this has to be such a big consideration 😔

There is a male worker at DSs nursery and he is such an asset to the team. The kids absolutely love him and he is fantastic at his job. He is a dad to young DCs himself has worked in early years education for almost 10 years now. When his youngest goes to school he plans to go on and study to become a primary teacher and I have no doubt he’ll be fantastic.

In saying that, I was in the fortunate situation of not having to send my child to nursery until he was 3. He was fully toilet trained before going and he was a very early talker so his communication by age 3 was great and I felt more comfortable with the idea of nursery in general knowing that he needed minimal help with personal care and that he could tell me things clearly.

Yes - the risk of abuse is raised… simple.