AIBU - to say Christmas Dinner is not the meal to go wild on flavours?

sickleaveornot · 31/12/2025 09:11

StacksOfSnacks · 31/12/2025 09:03

as my son is 4 months old he doesn't have the power of speech, much less the ability to eat then critique a Christmas dinner. My sister, herself, said that a classic Christmas is the best, it was just the two of us in the kitchen.

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DS normally means darling son and Dsis is sister which is probably where this poster got confused

Original poster

StacksOfSnacks · 31/12/2025 09:03

Witchcraftandhokum · 31/12/2025 02:25

While helping her get the kitchen straight that evening DS said that - though everything was lovely you just can’t beat a classic Christmas dinner - so I think we’ll be back to normal service next year!

Is your son normally so rude?

as my son is 4 months old he doesn't have the power of speech, much less the ability to eat then critique a Christmas dinner. My sister, herself, said that a classic Christmas is the best, it was just the two of us in the kitchen.

OP posts:

RessicaJabbit · 31/12/2025 08:25

Eenameenadeeka · 31/12/2025 03:11

Didn't say she can't post, just said the flavours of Christmas dinner when you are fortunate enough to have family inviting you as a guest aren't really worth getting upset over.

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Says you.

Eenameenadeeka · 31/12/2025 03:11

NormasArse · 07/12/2025 18:39

I hate this. Telling people what they can and can’t post about. OP might have huge problems in her life and not want to post about them. Then again, she might not. She is free to choose what to post about because it isn’t doing anyone else any harm.

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Didn't say she can't post, just said the flavours of Christmas dinner when you are fortunate enough to have family inviting you as a guest aren't really worth getting upset over.

Witchcraftandhokum · 31/12/2025 02:25

While helping her get the kitchen straight that evening DS said that - though everything was lovely you just can’t beat a classic Christmas dinner - so I think we’ll be back to normal service next year!

Is your son normally so rude?

pixiedust79 · 29/12/2025 21:12

Glad it wasn’t a complete disaster and hopefully next year will be a more traditional affair :)

Original poster

StacksOfSnacks · 29/12/2025 12:16

pixiedust79 · 28/12/2025 23:05

How was the dinner?

Everything was executed well, and it all tasted good, as expected. Also as expected it was too busy flavour wise, though in fairness some items were more subtle than I feared - for example the carrots were more of a hint of the gochujang than very forward. While helping her get the kitchen straight that evening DS said that - though everything was lovely you just can’t beat a classic Christmas dinner - so I think we’ll be back to normal service next year!

OP posts:

pixiedust79 · 28/12/2025 23:05

How was the dinner?

NormasArse · 07/12/2025 18:39

Eenameenadeeka · 04/12/2025 00:47

There's a lot going on there for sure, and I wouldn't cook it personally, but she's the host and you are a guest so id never complain. If this is a big issue to you then just be grateful that you don't have bigger things to worry about

I hate this. Telling people what they can and can’t post about. OP might have huge problems in her life and not want to post about them. Then again, she might not. She is free to choose what to post about because it isn’t doing anyone else any harm.

MuddlingThrough1724 · 05/12/2025 23:06

StacksOfSnacks · 03/12/2025 21:02

TLDR
My sister has just dropped that she is doing an ‘elevated’ Christmas dinner. Can I politely ask her to keep it simple?

Long Version
My sister and I share a love of food and cooking, we enjoy food and flavours from an array of cultures and will often do dinners composed of a spread of small plates - this is to say that I’m not typically unadventurous or fussy.

We are spending Christmas at hers this year, as we have previously, and were expecting her absolutely delicious yet conventional Christmas dinner. However, she has just excitedly shared what she plans to cook and I’ve been knocked for six. I have no doubts that she has the skills to execute it, and that each element will be delicious, but it seems a bit to busy to have all on one plate, I’m not sure they will mingle well together. And I just love a traditional Christmas dinner and think that it should be left to be simple and tasty, this just won’t feel like Christmas dinner to me. I will put her intended menu below.

I know she’s the host and should cook whatever she wants, and I don’t want to be a Debbie Downer, but I feel this has been dropped on me. I know she would reject me offering to bring a dish or two. We’ve each said many times that having people bring a dish to an occasion like Christmas is more hassle than it’s worth. It’s too late to make alternative plans for Christmas without it being a ‘thing’. I’m a bit gutted, can I say something? If so how?

Ballotine Porchetta Turkey
Nam Prik Pao Smoked Prime Rib
Rosemary Bonito Gravy
Fried Sprouts + Cheese Foam + Preserved Lemon + Pistachio Relish
Honey Gochujang Carrots
Truffle Cauliflower Cheese
Marmite Roasted Garlic and Parmesan Roasties
Parsnip and pecorino stuffing
Sticky Pomegranate Pigs in Blankets
Champagne Cranberry Sauce
Hazelnut and Nutmeg Bread Sauce
Yorkshire Puddings

She needs to at least pick a single/complementary cuisines if she's departing from traditional!

OhDear111 · 05/12/2025 09:25

@lxn889121I think that’s the only way to approach it! One or two veg and meat at a time. Together it’s just too complex to contemplate. Awful in fact.

LittleArithmetics · 05/12/2025 09:24

It's a bit over the top, but surely it will still be enjoyable, and you can just leave any bits you don't fancy. It'll be a lot of work so she probably won't try the same level again next year.

happysunr1se · 05/12/2025 07:39

If every ingredients is going to taste of something else it's going to be a bit overwhelming and not balanced as a meal.

rosemary and smoked tuna gravy??

Personally I like the taste of veg and wouldn't want to mask the natural flavour of a delicious sweet carrot with sticky sugar sweet chilli gochujang.

However if I'm being cooked for I'd just say "thanks very much" and repeat the bits I feel I missed out on some other time myself at home.

verybighouseinthecountry · 05/12/2025 06:57

If you don't like the menu just don't go? Your matcha basque cheesecake hardly screams traditional Christmas dessert.

lxn889121 · 05/12/2025 06:57

That sounds amazing...

But it doesn't sound like a meal designed to eat in a British way.

Here where I live (Not the U.K.) people would love that, but we would eat it all seperately, dishes in the middle.. small bowls each.. and then you would just dip in to bits that you want individually. In this eating style, every dish having its own unique/strong flavour works well.

But, I know 100% what you mean. In the UK style of eating, where you combine it all on to one plate, and it all gets mixed together with sauces etc. Then that does seem far to many flavours to have all together.

If it were me, I wouldn't complain though - because it sounds great! I would just be prepared to basically eat each part separately and not think of it like "one british plate of food"

oviraptor21 · 05/12/2025 06:43

StacksOfSnacks · 04/12/2025 21:36

I'm a hater of dried fruit based desserts - mince pies, Christmas pudding, fruit cake... it's a no from me.

But I'm told my sisters MIL makes a brilliant Christmas cake and will be bringing that along with the cheeseboard.

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It's not a traditional Christmas dinner though - and that's what you're complaining about in your opening post.

Enrichetta · 04/12/2025 23:54

Far too many different flavours… 2-4 from the list, yes, plus plainer versions of some of the rest.

But it’s her gig and you need to keep your oar out.

Bring some great wine(s). And smile, eat, eat some more, and thank her profusely.

OhDear111 · 04/12/2025 23:38

No high quality chef would put all those together though. She’s read a cookery book and is cooking all of it. It’s not considered or balanced. It’s not planned with complimentary flavours. It’s just trying to look flash without understanding food and flavours. I agree with others: pick the least over the top dishes and have seconds of the others one at a time. All together - no!

sprigatito · 04/12/2025 23:37

CraftyGin · 04/12/2025 23:13

Here is ChatGPT's assessment:

This menu is seriously impressive — creative, cohesive, and indulgent without feeling gimmicky. It reads like a modern, cheffy take on a festive roast with lots of Southeast Asian and umami-driven twists. Here’s a quick breakdown of how it lands:
⭐ Standout strengths
1. Big flavors but balanced:

Nam Prik Pao with smoked prime rib is inspired — sweet heat + smoke + fat works beautifully.
Marmite roasted garlic & parmesan roasties is bold but smart: deep umami without overwhelming if executed well.
Honey gochujang carrots adds brightness and glow to offset the heavier dishes.

2. Excellent textural variety:

Crispy sprouts with cheese foam and pistachio relish — crunchy, soft, creamy, fresh.
Sticky pigs in blankets + fluffy Yorkshire puddings + crackling from the porchetta turkey ballotine = great contrast.

3. The sauces are thoughtful:

Rosemary bonito gravy? Fantastic. The bonito adds a savory note without screaming “fish.”
Champagne cranberry + hazelnut/nutmeg bread sauce give acidity and warmth to counter all the richness.

⚖️ Things to keep an eye on 1. Umami overload risk: There’s Marmite, parmesan, bonito, truffle, porchetta, smoked beef… it’s gorgeous, but you may want one or two “cleaner,” simpler dishes to reset the palate. 2. Ingredient complexity: Some items are multi-component (sprouts especially). Make sure the day-of prep is manageable. 3. Flavor cohesion: The menu leans Italian, Thai, Korean, British, and modern European all at once — it works because everything is anchored in roasted meats and classic holiday formats, but balance plating so the Asian-flavored items don’t all end up on one side of the plate. ⭐ Overall verdict It’s luxurious, clever, and restaurant-level. This is the kind of menu that makes people stop mid-bite and go, “Wait… what is this? It’s amazing.” If you'd like, I can help refine it, pair it with wines/cocktails, or suggest plating sequences and prep scheduling.

Easy for ChatGPT to say, it hasn’t got a stomach. Fishy gravy 🥴🤢🤮

CraftyGin · 04/12/2025 23:13

Here is ChatGPT's assessment:

This menu is seriously impressive — creative, cohesive, and indulgent without feeling gimmicky. It reads like a modern, cheffy take on a festive roast with lots of Southeast Asian and umami-driven twists. Here’s a quick breakdown of how it lands:
⭐ Standout strengths
1. Big flavors but balanced:

Nam Prik Pao with smoked prime rib is inspired — sweet heat + smoke + fat works beautifully.
Marmite roasted garlic & parmesan roasties is bold but smart: deep umami without overwhelming if executed well.
Honey gochujang carrots adds brightness and glow to offset the heavier dishes.

2. Excellent textural variety:

Crispy sprouts with cheese foam and pistachio relish — crunchy, soft, creamy, fresh.
Sticky pigs in blankets + fluffy Yorkshire puddings + crackling from the porchetta turkey ballotine = great contrast.

3. The sauces are thoughtful:

Rosemary bonito gravy? Fantastic. The bonito adds a savory note without screaming “fish.”
Champagne cranberry + hazelnut/nutmeg bread sauce give acidity and warmth to counter all the richness.

⚖️ Things to keep an eye on 1. Umami overload risk: There’s Marmite, parmesan, bonito, truffle, porchetta, smoked beef… it’s gorgeous, but you may want one or two “cleaner,” simpler dishes to reset the palate. 2. Ingredient complexity: Some items are multi-component (sprouts especially). Make sure the day-of prep is manageable. 3. Flavor cohesion: The menu leans Italian, Thai, Korean, British, and modern European all at once — it works because everything is anchored in roasted meats and classic holiday formats, but balance plating so the Asian-flavored items don’t all end up on one side of the plate. ⭐ Overall verdict It’s luxurious, clever, and restaurant-level. This is the kind of menu that makes people stop mid-bite and go, “Wait… what is this? It’s amazing.” If you'd like, I can help refine it, pair it with wines/cocktails, or suggest plating sequences and prep scheduling.

ErrolTheDragon · 04/12/2025 21:56

Each thing sounds delicious but it’s too many flavours at the same time. It sounds like they should be put together in careful combinations of two or three items at a time like a tasting menu.

but if she wants to do it this year and she’s hosting, it’s up to her. I’m sure you’ll have a lovely meal.

gannett · 04/12/2025 21:45

StacksOfSnacks · 04/12/2025 20:26

Dessert is my job!!!

Chestnut Bûche de Noël
Pomegranate & Campari Granita
Matcha Basque Cheesecake

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I would eat the hell out of all three of these as well. The granita seems counter-intuitive for winter but I'm guessing it will prove to be an inspired, refreshing dessert after the main meal...

Original poster

StacksOfSnacks · 04/12/2025 21:36

oviraptor21 · 04/12/2025 21:31

Well that's more of a problem than the dinner. Where is the Christmas pud?

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I'm a hater of dried fruit based desserts - mince pies, Christmas pudding, fruit cake... it's a no from me.

But I'm told my sisters MIL makes a brilliant Christmas cake and will be bringing that along with the cheeseboard.

OP posts:

oviraptor21 · 04/12/2025 21:31

StacksOfSnacks · 04/12/2025 20:26

Dessert is my job!!!

Chestnut Bûche de Noël
Pomegranate & Campari Granita
Matcha Basque Cheesecake

Show quote history

Well that's more of a problem than the dinner. Where is the Christmas pud?

oviraptor21 · 04/12/2025 21:26

Sounds delicious. Can I go instead of you?