Ban men from working in nursery settings

My boss said he found it really upsetting, embarrassing and humiliating when he was asked to leave the room during a midwifery appointment so his wife could answer confidentially whether he was the father and whether she was in an abusive relationship.

I sympathised a tiny weeny bit but asked him if he didn't think the more important thing than his hurt feelings was protecting pregnant women and babies?

I wonder about similar guidelines for men. If you want to be involved in caring professions, then you accept heightened scrutiny and restrictions on the care you can provide for the good of all clients nationally. However much this might hurt an individual man's feelings.

This is an issue only men can solve.

Thank you my darling.
Sadly I don't work front line and work advisory for all different places. It's just sad men in childcare have worked so hard only to be questioned about their abilities and motivation.

I'm sure it must be so frustrating and disheartening to have the horrible actions of this person seen as a reflection of all men working with children. The actions of a few spoil it for the many. I hope the place and families you work with are supportive.

Just for the record, it is entirely legal, necessary and appropriate to ban men from certain jobs. It's called a Sex-Specific Exemption (SSE) and is included in the Equality Act 2010. It allows domestic violence refuges, rape crisis support centres and other similar places to refuse to employ men. On the grounds that they are men and their presence may be intimidating, humiliating or distressing to the women using the services.

So if nurseries wanted to stop employing men, it could easily be done.

Equality does not mean treating everyone the same. It's about providing everyone the opportunity to get equal outcomes despite any disadvantages they start with.

Tell you what, let’s just get rid of all nurseries. They’re not needed, and kids start school at 4/5, so it’s only a few years.

I'm an early years professional, Qualified at 18 ( now 47 ) the first NNEB Male Nursery Nurse in West London. It has always been my vocation. But days like these just make me feel like just giving up.

Yet still they'll come to announce that "women do it too" and how much better the men they know in caring roles are than the horrible women. Unfathomable isn't it?

I saw this

fucking terrifying

So is each and every nonce thats been jailed for noncing 🤷‍♀️

Tbf though, i acknowledge later in the thread that we cant really ban men from society

Its one of those fears that I have as the mother of a vulnerable non verbal child, and i think its valid, given the number of male offenders in society and the overrepresentation of these people in the care industry

What do you think a speech therapist is going to do that’s terrifying exactly?
They work in clinics where parents take their children to the appointments and work in school settings where they are surrounded by people all the time?
They will also be subject to a dbs check and rigorous safeguarding procedures to do that job .

Anywhere where a woman, girl or child is in a state of undress and thus vulnerable. Apparently that doesn’t include nurseries.

No, I didn't say that we shouldn't ban men.
I asked where else? Anywhere where men might be alone with a woman or girl?

Womens refuges, womens changing rooms, women's toilets, womens prisons......

Oh, wait, we already do that because of the risks, yet you're advocating for men to have intimate access to non verbal children, on a thread started because a paedophile in a nursery has been convicted and has, potentially, hundreds of victims.

Weird how your mind has went straight to the rights of men and not the safety of children.

A female nursery worker:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-devon-49684939

So ban men from nursery, preschool, infant school, nursing, schools with non verbal children. Where else?

Maybe around the same time we tell children that the feelings of men are more important than their safety.

When should we tell boys how they are thought of by society? I think a nursery rhyme would do it. What are boys made of ...

You love going around in circles with your logical fallacies.

But all those unrelated males are men. All the men in you own life, the ones you trust, are "unknown males" to other people. So logically, you can't say you trust a male that you know, that would be illogical.

If you don't trust men, then presumably you agree with all young boys being told they ARE child abusers, and that they will be treated as such.

Whay age do you think it's appropriate to tell them this?

"as pedophile-proof as humanly possible in a nursery" then if you prefer.
98% of sex crimes are carried out by men.
There is always a minuscule risk that women (usually with a pedophile partner) will sexually abuse children in their care so you can never eliminate the risk entirely although that would be wonderful.
By excluding males, you can eliminate 98% of the risk.
That seems worthwhile to me.

I agree that now where can be pedophile proof but by banning men you make it as close to that as you can be.

You are literally saying that no woman could possibly be a paedophile. It's wrong and encourages people to relax their usual safeguarding attitude around women. You are making things easier for female paedophiles.