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AIBU?

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Original poster

To tell her it’s boring

31 replies

AntoinetteNoCake · 03/12/2025 16:05

(Light hearted) So my friend is such a lovely person, we’ve been friends for about 15 years now and seen each other through lots of trials and tribulations (although probably I’ve always been the more supportive one). She started a job working in an accounts type role about 5 years ago and has done brilliantly well, she started on reception and worked her way up, I’m really proud of her. The problem is, it’s all she talks about. Every conversation 5 minutes in turns to talking about work. The people, the job, her deadlines, the intricacies of various parts of the job, what people have said to her, things she’s completed etc. it’s as if I’ve said ‘so how’s work? Tell me all about it!’ As lovely as she is, it’s making me want to avoid her. I’ve tried steering the conversation away, I’ve tried saying ‘wow your job sounds pretty boring’ (which is actually quite rude😂) But she just keeps doing it. If I were to tell her outright to stop talking about it I feel like she’d be quite hurt. So what do I do? Be blunt or put up with it to my own detriment as it’s really annoying me (for context, I work in a listening type MH role so am probably a bit fed up of listening to things that I don’t always want to) WWYD?

OP posts:
ThirdStorm · 03/12/2025 16:24

I try really hard not to talk about work because its a large part of my identity and I know its boring for others! And I actually want a break from it too. I had a friend who I used to work with and somehow we'd always talk about work and I found it boring/relentless! Trying to change the topic was my tactic and it was moderately successful. "OMG sorry to interrupt but I meant to tell you who I saw last week" or some such!

BennyHenny · 03/12/2025 16:18

Redirect the conversation after a set time you can tolerate “Right, that’s enough talk about work, I spend enough of my week thinking about that, what you got planned for the weekend?”

Original poster
AntoinetteNoCake · 03/12/2025 16:15

CandyCaneKisses · 03/12/2025 16:07

I recently had to tell my friend that they were talking about work constantly as it would be late and night and they’d be on the phone chatting away about their job. It was absolutely relentless so I asked them why it was on their mind so much and made them aware of how much they were going on about it.

How did they respond?

OP posts:
Original poster
AntoinetteNoCake · 03/12/2025 16:15

I think she’s at a point in her life where her work is a huge part of her identity. She doesn’t do much apart from that, doesn’t really go anywhere, only seems to really speak to me and 2 other people (plus work colleagues I guess!) so I guess that’s her main thing to talk about because there’s not much else going on!

OP posts:
OrdinaryGirl · 03/12/2025 16:08

Try taking it in turns to do ‘High, Low, Buffalo’.
You share the high point of your day, then the low point, then something completely random. Then swap. We do this with the DC at dinner too. It gives the conversation some boundaries if they’re needed.
You could Google some questions to take the conversation about work a bit wider / deeper too so it doesn’t get stuck on the minutiae.

CandyCaneKisses · 03/12/2025 16:07

I recently had to tell my friend that they were talking about work constantly as it would be late and night and they’d be on the phone chatting away about their job. It was absolutely relentless so I asked them why it was on their mind so much and made them aware of how much they were going on about it.