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Massive increase in cost for lessons, is this normal?

338 replies

WouldRatherBeOnaBeach · 03/12/2025 02:18

As per title, one of my children has flute lessons. Heard last night from the teacher guy that the lesson will be going up from £32 to £40 in the new year, for the same amount of time.

Daughter loves the lessons, but our money is very tight. Husband gives me £85 for the week and I have to find this lesson money out of it as well as feed a household of 5.

I dont understand if things are going up by 3% (or whatever it is ), how are some things going up by SO much. Hubby says I should just pay it as the teacher might not have increased his rates for years, but we’ve only been doing the lessons since the summer and the percentage increase feels huge.

(The teacher is a guy my husband used to work with, not sure if this could be why he just wants me to shut up and pay, to save his embarrassment?!)

I already find it such a juggle to make sure everything is covered on such a low income, I am feeling sad that I now have this additional stress.

Is it me? Am I being unreasonable??

OP posts:
Wherestheteenguide · 03/12/2025 06:42

The MU rate is £44 per hour so it's it not that it's expensive but the jump up is expensive. I did t a similar thing a few years back. The problem was I hadn't put my fees up for 15 years for various reasons and then it seemed like a massive hike.
I think that as long as that's the case and he's not planning this every year at such a high percentage then that's the norm.
If affordability for you is an issue could you go 30/45min?

Music lessons are expensive but I don't know another industry except sport where you've had to hone your skills since the age of 6/7 and are expected to keep practicing hours a day to keep on top of your game...

Motheringlikeapelican · 03/12/2025 06:42

And what happens if one of your other children wants to start a class or lessons?

Motheringlikeapelican · 03/12/2025 06:41

If the cost of lessons is increasing, and he wants them to continue then the desultory budget of 85 pounds a week for all expenses will have to increase - has he suggested this?

Lemons1571 · 03/12/2025 06:41

The thing to give up here is the husband.

Overthebow · 03/12/2025 06:39

Quite honestly you really can’t spend half your weeks food budget on flute lessons for one dd. You have a family of 5, so presumably 2 other DCs (or other family members), and spending that much on 1 leaving not enough money for food just isn’t right. If money is that tight then she shouldn’t be doing it, £85 isn’t really enough anyway and people must be going without. But also, if you’re given £85 per week for food, is that actually all there is for food or is your DH withholding money?

Satsuma55 · 03/12/2025 06:38

How many children do you have? 3? Are you in receipt of child benefit?

Anusername · 03/12/2025 06:35

When money is this tight I wouldn’t even choose to take the lesson from the beginning… hobbies are optional while eating healthy is not.

Porcuine20 · 03/12/2025 06:33

£40 per hour is about the going rate for flute lessons around here - so if she’s having an hour, the rate is reasonable and £32 would have been on the low side. I’d see if you can swap to 30-minute lessons - that’s fine for a beginner and it’s the practice time at home that’s most important. If it’s £40 for half an hour though that would be ridiculously steep and I’d look for another teacher.
Regardless though, it sounds like either money is too tight and it’s not fair on the other kids to spend on this - or that there are deeper financial/control issues with your husband.

ellesbellesxxx · 03/12/2025 06:15

That’s a huge increase. Whenever I increase my rates (most years) it is about £1 a lesson more but I give at least two months notice. How long is the lesson?

Bananafofana · 03/12/2025 06:08

My children’s music lessons are £50
an hour (pro rated for my younger who just has 30 minute lessons). I think the union rate is now something like £42 / hour. So depending on the length of the lesson, you were probably underpaying until now.

BUT so much is disturbing about your post. You are given a tiny allowance for food and extra curriculars. If your “hubby” wants the flute lessons to continue you need to have a much more reasonable budget. On current figures your family cannot afford music lessons I’m afraid.

Yamahahaha · 03/12/2025 06:07

£40 p/h is not extortionate, but it's a ridiculous percentage increase and he should have given you a lot more notice, ideally letting you know by half-term, not just before the end of term.

LAMPS1 · 03/12/2025 06:06

£85 per week to feed 5 people is already impossible.
Please tell us how you have been doing it on £53.

Yes that’s a massive increase. Look around for a cheaper tutor.
But bear in mind that private tutors can charge pretty much what they like if there is high demand for their services.

ktopfwcv · 03/12/2025 06:04

🤔

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 03/12/2025 05:55

I couldn’t feed a family of 5 for £53pw. Either you can’t afford flute lessons, however much she likes them, or you’re being financially abused. Which is it?

TFloss · 03/12/2025 05:45

Change the flute lessons to fortnightly to balance out budget and supporting hobby. Daughter can do own practice in between lessons.

Roselily123 · 03/12/2025 05:40

Blueuggboots · 03/12/2025 02:22

how on earth do you feed a family of 5 on £85 a week??!!

why are you being given so little money? Do you work? Do you have access to the finances?

This

Horses7 · 03/12/2025 05:39

Blueuggboots · 03/12/2025 02:22

how on earth do you feed a family of 5 on £85 a week??!!

why are you being given so little money? Do you work? Do you have access to the finances?

This

winterwarmer8274 · 03/12/2025 05:39

Yes its a massive increase - I would tell him you can't afford the increase and see if you can negotiate, or just stop the lessons and use youtube.

However, not sure I believe you are spending such a high % of your £85 weekly budget on flute lessons for one child anyway. What do the other 4 kids get?

Rice and beans for dinner every night?

Zanatdy · 03/12/2025 05:38

Absolutely no way if your food budget is reduced so much. She may enjoy it, but you can’t afford it.

replay2025 · 03/12/2025 05:34

£85 for a family of 5?! Surely this is a typo

Franjipanl8r · 03/12/2025 05:32

Can she join an orchestra group instead, would that be cheaper than private lessons? It sounds like private lessons even at the cheaper rate were too much of a stretch for you.

Bulbsbulbsbulbs · 03/12/2025 05:14

How are you feeding 5 people on that amount? Where is your child benefit going? Going hungry for a music lesson is a really bad idea so I would stop the lesson completely as you can't afford it even before the increase.

ForMyNextTrickIWillMakeThisVodkaDisappear · 03/12/2025 05:08

£85 a week for the food shop for 5 people plus a flute lesson? Umm… how? £85 just on food for 5 people surely isn’t doable?

Glittertwins · 03/12/2025 05:03

I think we paid about £40/hour for private music lessons 2 years back.

banananas1999 · 03/12/2025 05:00

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