Massive increase in cost for lessons, is this normal?

Its rubbish, but if you can't afford it then you will just have to cancel them. Do you mean you have £85 per week for the grocery shop? Thats cutting it very fine as it is. We spend £80 for a family of 4 on food and we are very frugal. Do you have any other income?

I would as if you can do a half an hour lesson - unless your DD is grade5+ and preparing for exams at this stage she does not need hour long lessons.

Separately - if you are only being given £85 per week, your DH is potentially being abusive. Unless money is so tight that is all he has - in which case, the flute lessons have to go.

I’m a grade 8 musician (flute and recorder, but also guitar Grade 5 ish, mainly played to accompany singing) and as much as I love playing, it has not enhanced my career, created opportunities that have enhanced my life. It was a lovely hobby. I chose not to pursue further training/apply to music school as all the musicians I knew were, well, teachers. Working PT in schools and tutoring as few schools even then had FT music staff.

The return on investment of music lessons therefore is ridiculous unless you are a prodigy. I was fortunately largely self-taught and had access to talented and gifted programmes that meant my mother never paid a penny - but she was absolutely not coughing up for music lessons when we didn’t know where next wee’s food shop was coming from.

I taught myself through ‘Tune a day’ books in the period as it was before internet, you tube and online apps - my kids have taught themselves piano, guitar and drums from those apps and got to about grade5/6 level before focusing on GCSEs. It’s still a lovely hobby for them too, one which they can pick up and resume at any stage in life (I have joined a rusty parents orchestra, for example).

If your DD loves it and wants to continue learning, and money is as tight as it seems, then I’d encourage her down that route.

And I’d really sit down with DH and review the reasons behind his budget.

....Your husband GIVES you???

Do you live in the 1870's??

Local price list (south east)

I wouldn't expect a beginner to have more than a half hour lesson so it does seem a lot.
I'd shop around or go to fortnightly - won't make a huge difference in progress providing your DC is motivated to practise.

Absolutely no chance would I spend a large amount of my food budget on an activity for 1 child. The rest of the family should not have to do without for a lesson plus the increase is ridiculous. Is that all your husband has to spare every week to give you? What about child benefit? Are you entitled to UC?

Your husband should increase your allowance accordingly.

and then you should leave him. You are being financially abused. It is a form of domestic violence.

Could you reduce the number of lessons your DC child attends, maybe one a fortnight rather than weekly?

you have two different issues here, so it’s impossible to say if you are being unreasonable. Issue 1; as a grown woman why are you being ‘given’ an allowance? If you are a SAHP, monies your husband earns should be joint. And if you are a SAHP start looking for a job.
second issue, the music lesson. If the £40 is for 1x 30 min. Lesson, yes that’s steep, and I’d be looking for another teacher! If it’s £40 for one hour, then that’s absolutely fine and the current price of £32 is low.
remember the cost of everything has gone up. Most music teachers are self-employed, so they have many more costs to incur compared to their PAYE counterparts (e.g Insurance, no pay if off sick, paying into private pension, national insurance and tax, lack of job security etc etc).

Well, they are in Scotland. At least in South Lanarkshire. I went to school in a town in south Lanarkshire and got free lessons. My kids go to school in a different town in South Lanarkshire and get free lessons. Any kid that wants them, gets them. The South Lanarkshire music tuition service also provides the instrument for free; it’s yours for your whole time at school, from primary through secondary. You can provide your own instrument too.
But we also don’t pay for ingredients for HE or anything like that either.

If money is as tight as that (and it’s not your DH being financially abusive), then I’d stop flute lessons, even at the old cost - you can’t afford it.
Concentrate on feeding your family well.

You still have to pay for lessons.

Music lessons in schools aren’t free!
One of my schools pays me £42 per hour, but they charge the parents a lot more than that to cover admin, concerts, accompanying etc. the students have 20 or 30 min lessons.
Maybe the OP could consider that?

Ummm. Why are you only having £85 a week for that size family? I think you need to talk to Women’s Aid.

More information needed. What is the family income? Why do you only get £85 per week to feed 5 people? Do you and DH work? It sounds like the flute lessons are not the issue - apart from the fact that you can't afford them.

This post is confusing. If that’s actually your budget and it’s not abuse or a typo then you can’t afford the lessons. And never could really. The problem isn’t the flute teacher who has been giving you mates rates until now.

Having food is also good motivation to keep your children out of food poverty

Some people can self learn - just like some people can become a millionaire on the back of nothing - but on average people do better with a tutor

how they afforded to buy a flute with the kind of food budget OP is talking about … this is either a piss take or serious abuse

The flute lessons aren’t your issue here as such - £40 if that’s for an hour is a reasonable price. The issue is that you’re only being given £85 a week. You can’t possibly take flute lessons out of that amount and feed the family well. That’s what needs addressing.

That would be a rate for an hours lesson ?
we would pay slightly less round here -36 to 38 but cities tend to be higher and you should be using the 85 to pay for food

but your whole finances seem off

what visibility do you have of his income?

what opportunities are there for you to work ?

If someone has already had one or more years of tuition, they will have a good grounding in the basics, if the teacher was effective.
Jacob Collier taught himself several instruments - and yes was in a very musical family but much of his learning was self-led,
I speak with first hand knowledge of children who have taught themselves how to play an instrument using online programmes. It may not be ideal but in the circumstances it could work!
Oh and Paul McCartney is self-taught.

Obviously you can’t spend half of your family’s weekly budget for food on one child’s flute lessons. That’s not sustainable.

The problem isn't the flute teacher, it's your husband. I don't know how you've been managing to feed everyone on such a paltry amount but it's not enough.

It might be that your husband doesn't earn much but I suspect he's probably a high earner who is abusing you financially. People who are generally struggling for money wouldn't have been spending £32 on a flute lesson in the first place.

If he is a low earner then you need to get back to work too (if he has to "give" you money then I'm presuming you don't work). If he isn't, then this is a marriage problem.

The priorities in your household are totally wrong. £53 is not enough money for a family of 5 to eat healthily. What are the reasons it’s £85?

I can’t believe your DH seriously expects you to spend almost half your paltry budget on a flute lesson with his friend!
Where does your child benefit go? Do you work -or are you eligible for UC to top up your income?
I am not surprised by the cost of the lesson per se - but agree the increase is huge. This is a side issue though as it seems your DH is completely unrealistic about the cost of food.

So you are currently feeding a family of 5 on £53 a week? The rest of the money goes on flute lessons? I am very perturbed by this. If your DH wants the lessons to continue he needs to pay them so you can use the full £85 per week to feed you all.