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My neighbour is a convicted paedophile

312 replies

Obviouslyneedtonamechange · 02/12/2025 11:56

I've just found out from another neighbour that the man two doors down, who we chat to regularly and are friendly with, has been convicted of horrific child pornography charges. Like, the worst. It's really thrown me, I have a two year old and a four year old and I want them to be able to play in their garden without worrying about him watching or worse.
We live on a really small street which the name of was reported in the local paper so I am also a bit worried about potential vigilante type actions. I am obviously hoping he moves away (his marriage has collapsed so I'm hoping he financially has to) but no sign of that yet. Incredibly he got a suspended sentence, what a joke. Am I unreasonable to feel like I want to move?! What do I do?

OP posts:
ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:33

HoppityBun · 02/12/2025 14:24

Sarah’s law doesn’t give out information unless it’s considered to be necessary. The OP can apply: what happens after that might or might not assist:

”*Anyone who is worried about someone's behaviour towards a child can apply, not just a child's parents. This includes people like a grandparent, neighbour or friend.”

Please read the whole thing FGS.

"You must apply for information about a specific person and a specific child or children they spend time with. You cannot apply for general information about child sex offenders."

The OPs neighbour is not spending time with OPs children nor are there any specific DC she is worried the neighbour is spending time with which is the only way your quoted paragraph would apply.

StephensLass1977 · 02/12/2025 14:33

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Oh please don't do this. Don't get tangled up in his life. Have nothing whatsoever to do with him. That could end really badly for you.

OneProudAquaFinch · 02/12/2025 14:32

My neighbour is a dirty rottern pedophile and we dont give him a inch of our time he knows wat we do my advice is dont talk done look he soon get the message

sickleaveornot · 02/12/2025 14:31

Tbh it's better to know and have that information.... There's a hell of alot of unconvicted ones around that you would never know about

JengaCupboard · 02/12/2025 14:31

There is one that lives at the end of my road. He's known locally. I would happily mow him down with my car.

I don't have small kids, and I believe there are limited places he is allowed to be unsupervised but even so. Absolute gutter scum.

I'd tell him why you no longer wish to engage with him, loudly, and without embarrassment. Unfortunately there are probably just plenty more we don't know about.

KarmenPQZ · 02/12/2025 14:29

Obviouslyneedtonamechange · 02/12/2025 12:13

Definitely sure on identity. I think I will have to say something if I see him (which I will). I don't want him having an easy ride on a quiet street. I want him gone. The other neighbours are all upset too - one couple even took him out for a meal the other week because his wife had left him and he'd lost his job (makes sense now) and they wanted to cheer him up. He does have kids but they are at university now.

I get that you want him gone. But gone where exactly?

if I were you I’d just be relieved you know about this one enough to keep your guard up.

but never assume there’s not another one in your midst that you don’t know about.

Ghhhn · 02/12/2025 14:28

Can you put anything on your fence line to block his view to your kids when they are in the back garden?

Twatalert · 02/12/2025 14:28

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:16

Like it or not, he isn't a known risk of abusing OPs children. He's a known risk of viewing CSAM, not a known risk of contact offending.

And his conviction and the restrictions he's under now will reflect that assessment.

It's abhorrent of course but doesn't mean he's a direct risk to DC in his vicinity which is what was said by the senior Police officer in the link I provided upthread.

https://news.npcc.police.uk/releases/the-scale-of-child-sexual-abuse-means-we-cannot-solely-prosecute-our-way-out

Edited

Your assessment is so messed up. They all start by looking at images, then some progress further and commit 'worse'. He doesn't get to receive the benefit of the doubt here. He likes kids and therefore every caution should be taken so he never gets the chance to abuse anyone again. If I had a man in my neighbourhood I would consider that all he could be prosecuted for were images. It does not mean he never did anything to a child.

HoppityBun · 02/12/2025 14:24

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:10

Sarah's law just doesn't give out information about neighbours who are never alone with the children in question.

It's for people where there is a potential specific risk to specific children so e.g a single Mum with a new partner.

And the OP doesn't need information from the Police anyway as it's in the local paper.

Sarah’s law doesn’t give out information unless it’s considered to be necessary. The OP can apply: what happens after that might or might not assist:

”*Anyone who is worried about someone's behaviour towards a child can apply, not just a child's parents. This includes people like a grandparent, neighbour or friend.”

Staringintothevoid616 · 02/12/2025 14:24

Obviouslyneedtonamechange · 02/12/2025 12:16

Because otherwise it looks like he'll keep saying hi to me and chatting as normal! I need to cut that dead, I don't want him near me or my family. So I'll have to say something like "I don't want to have anything to do with you. You know why." Or similar.

Yes, make it clear you know as does everyone on the street, tell him to steer clear of you and your children and if you see him so much as looking at your children you will be calling the police. “accidentally” let everyone you ideal to in on your worries.

Ketzele · 02/12/2025 14:23

There are so, so many men who have viewed images of child abuse. Many more than the number who would actively and directly abuse a child (Im not saying that makes it lesser, but its important to keep in mind when making safeguarding decisions). We cannot protect children, or ourselves, from men's eyes unfortunately.

I do understand how you feel. A family member who spent a load of time with my kids when they were small has completed a long jail sentence for child abuse images (a long sentence for a first offence - it was serious stuff). They were never left alone with him, but I could have driven myself mad with the 'what was in his mind when he looked at them' line of thinking.

You will keep your children safe. His thoughts are his own affair. Any vigilante action will only drive him underground which heightens the risk to other children.

justasking111 · 02/12/2025 14:17

divorcinganabsolutewanker · 02/12/2025 14:11

Move.

You likely know a few of these dirty bastards but are not aware of it.

They are everywhere!!

Well certainly here in n Wales. There's no point in moving. One got hounded out of our town. He turns up in our tiny village. Same face, same dog, same teddies in the window. He'd walk his dog in the children's park. We just banned the kids from talking to the bad man. Stopped going to the park which had a village hall hired out all the time for children clubs. We let every club know. He stayed around six months.

IMustDoMoreExercise · 02/12/2025 14:17

user2848502016 · 02/12/2025 12:01

That’s horrible and I would feel the same as you, sadly though paedophiles are everywhere and at least you know who this one is I suppose.
I’d stop being friendly with him though

Exactly, there is no point in moving as your new ndn could be one.

You just have to be careful with your children, as I assume that you would be anyway.

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:16

KilkennyCats · 02/12/2025 14:09

The point is that he’s a known risk, and therefore avoidable. There could be others close by posing an even bigger risk that op doesn’t know about.

Like it or not, he isn't a known risk of abusing OPs children. He's a known risk of viewing CSAM, not a known risk of contact offending.

And his conviction and the restrictions he's under now will reflect that assessment.

It's abhorrent of course but doesn't mean he's a direct risk to DC in his vicinity which is what was said by the senior Police officer in the link I provided upthread.

https://news.npcc.police.uk/releases/the-scale-of-child-sexual-abuse-means-we-cannot-solely-prosecute-our-way-out

Namechangeggg · 02/12/2025 14:12

Name changed for this.

We found there is one not too far from us.... He has a partner and had a baby with her (she knew about the situation and her being pregnant at the time likely contributed to the sentence being suspended). She also has a child from a previous relationship living in the same house...
Honestly, we were sicknened.
The news broke out in the local Facebook group and his partner was all over it defending him.
They live in a semi so it must be awful for people joined onto them, especially if they have kids.

divorcinganabsolutewanker · 02/12/2025 14:11

Move.

You likely know a few of these dirty bastards but are not aware of it.

They are everywhere!!

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:10

HoppityBun · 02/12/2025 14:02

Sarah's law just doesn't give out information about neighbours who are never alone with the children in question.

It's for people where there is a potential specific risk to specific children so e.g a single Mum with a new partner.

And the OP doesn't need information from the Police anyway as it's in the local paper.

Bromptotoo · 02/12/2025 14:10

IsItSnowing · 02/12/2025 13:50

But they are harming children. That's why just being in possession of it is a crime. I don't care how they rationalise it to themselves, they are nasty, vile, criminals and there is no excuse.

No argument with that, another poster made a similar point.

However if people are worried about their own children my disassociation point has mileage I think.

KilkennyCats · 02/12/2025 14:09

Kibble19 · 02/12/2025 12:23

I don’t get this “there are paedophiles everywhere, at least you know about this one” argument.

It is true that they hide in plain sight, but you surely go with risk. This person is a proven, convicted risk to children. So he should be identified and treated as such.

Imagine two neighbours’ houses with a dog each. One’s an XL bully who attacked someone before, the other is a similar sized, mix breed dog whom you have no knowledge of but doesn’t seem aggressive. Which one does your brain think is more dangerous? The same goes for people. Yes, the mix breed dog might attack one day, but you know the other is a risk.

The point is that he’s a known risk, and therefore avoidable. There could be others close by posing an even bigger risk that op doesn’t know about.

FlyingApple · 02/12/2025 14:08

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:05

Very likely yes, considering the sheer number of men accessing CSAM.

I'll ask again, where do you think anyone should move to where there isn't that risk?

And how to assess it or be sure?

Edited

And I'll reply again... If I had knowledge that they were a pedo then I'd move based on that knowledge. I wouldn't just go oh well, pedos are everywhere, it could happen again so nevermind, won't bother just in case.

NerrSnerr · 02/12/2025 14:07

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Because going to jail for arson will help the situation.

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 14:05

FlyingApple · 02/12/2025 14:02

Do you have a pedo living 2 doors down as well?

Very likely yes, considering the sheer number of men accessing CSAM.

I'll ask again, where do you think anyone should move to where there isn't that risk?

And how to assess it or be sure?

TallulahBetty · 02/12/2025 14:04

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Reported. Disgraceful.

3678194b · 02/12/2025 14:03

How horrible. A leopard never changes its spots. I don't think there is a cure for that, they shouldn't be living a normal life amongst families and communities.

I probably wouldn't say anything to him, don't think I'd have the nerve. I read recently half of all men in prison are in there for sexual offences.

There will be his type living everywhere, who we don't know anything about. I remember when a child my parents knew of one, though it never went to Court or anything, back then unless you were warned by word of mouth, no Internet, many of them could hide in plain site with most people being unaware of who they really were.

FlyingApple · 02/12/2025 14:02

ThisNeatRedMember · 02/12/2025 13:57

To magic unicorn land where there are no people accessing CSAM?

Where is that?

Do you have a pedo living 2 doors down as well?

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