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To think stepparents should not be financially responsible for other people's children?

608 replies

Mrsnothingthanks · 01/12/2025 22:00

That's just it really. I'm married. My husband is only financially responsible for our daughter, not my other children. Why should he be? Not his kids!
Surprises me on MN that others think stepparents should assume financial responsibility for kids that aren't theirs!

OP posts:
Ponderingwindow · 01/12/2025 22:11

The point of getting married is to link yourselves legally and financially. At that point, it’s hard to argue that you can truly keep children out of the financial aspects of the relationship.

I think people should be more hesitant to marry when children already exist. The finances are just too complicated. That is distinct from having relationships.

Mrsnothingthanks · 01/12/2025 22:09

@Slothey My husband didn't have any children when we met but I had two. I absolutely did not want him to take on financial responsibility for my sons - that's not his duty. I made this clear from the start and he very much respected that stance.

OP posts:
Merryoldgoat · 01/12/2025 22:07

I would treat any step child the way in which I hope my child would be treated by a step parent.

If I cohabited with someone with children then there is an amount to which I would have to have responsibility for them financially.

However I think step families are generally not the happy blends the adult fool themselves they are and I would never create a blended family, finances being one of many reasons.

Slothey · 01/12/2025 22:06

I think if you’re married, you’re a family. Or it’s just way too complicated.

But, that’s on of the reasons why I can think of very few situations where marrying when you already have kids is a good idea.

TFImBackIn · 01/12/2025 22:06

I know a lot of A level students found this out the hard way when their step parent's income was taken into account with student finance, even though the couple kept separate accounts.

Mrsnothingthanks · 01/12/2025 22:06

@Lmnop22 Emotionally yes, financially - why?! That is the role of the two biological parents.

OP posts:
TFImBackIn · 01/12/2025 22:05

Not financially, you don't!

Lmnop22 · 01/12/2025 22:04

You take on a partner with kids then you take on their kids too in my opinion!

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