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Original poster

DP putting his foot in it when meeting my friends for first time

286 replies

Lurker25 · 01/12/2025 20:50

I moved away from my hometown a few years ago for work, so don’t get back often. However I met up with friends over the weekend and introduced them to my DP. He rather put his foot in it, but swears it was nerves and he meant nothing by it. To not be too graphic, he basically told one of my friends that his ex would ‘allow’ a specific sex act at Christmas and on his Birthday. I wasn’t part of said conversation, but my friend told me and he admitted it. My friend said it was barely relevant to their conversation. Would you give him the benefit of the doubt if he’s otherwise been a great partner? Or do you think it’s a sign?

OP posts:
TwistedWonder · 02/12/2025 17:33

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 16:42

He’s a good man, respectful job, family values etc. Some people are going on like I am with a criminal which is really dramatic

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He’s a drink driver so he is technically committing a criminal offence

TwistedWonder · 02/12/2025 17:30

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 15:56

Rim

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Well I suppose it took away the lingering taste of the sprouts

britneyisfreebutnotokay · 02/12/2025 17:24

So on Christmas and his birthday she licked his bum? Bin him. Why is he telling your friends that? Probs so you can pick up where she licked off

B1anche · 02/12/2025 17:22

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 17:21

I’d be none the wiser. Unless he was naming me and showing a photo of me, I couldn’t care less.

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Goodness you are desperate! 🤣

Imdunfer · 02/12/2025 17:22

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 16:42

He’s a good man, respectful job, family values etc. Some people are going on like I am with a criminal which is really dramatic

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Whether he was nervous or not, he had sex on his mind when talking to your friends who he had only just met. If you stay with him you will be with a man who has immediate sexual attraction to women he barely knows and can't stop himself from blurting out something which shows that.

Be very sure you want to be with this man.

TheRealMagic · 02/12/2025 17:22

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 17:21

I’d be none the wiser. Unless he was naming me and showing a photo of me, I couldn’t care less.

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I suppose that tracks with your standards in general! Most people would be absolutely horrified to know that someone they were once intimate with would talk about them like that.

Original poster
Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 17:21

TheRealMagic · 02/12/2025 17:20

So you're fine if he talks about you in graphic sexual detail to random women, so long as you don't know them?

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I’d be none the wiser. Unless he was naming me and showing a photo of me, I couldn’t care less.

OP posts:
TheRealMagic · 02/12/2025 17:21

Also, no we don't all talk about sex acts we've done with exes to people we've just met (or at all), but it's telling that you think this is anywhere in the range of normal behaviour!

TheRealMagic · 02/12/2025 17:20

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 17:19

They don’t know his ex clearly. Nor would she have any reason to be aware of the conversation.

I am sure we’ve all spoken about exes at some point in time.

Edited
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So you're fine if he talks about you in graphic sexual detail to random women, so long as you don't know them?

Original poster
Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 17:19

TheRealMagic · 02/12/2025 17:16

This is such a personal thing to start talking to a stranger about. It feels really invasive somehow to be so graphic with someone unwitting. Imagine how his ex would feel to know that he's telling essentially random women this. That'll be how he speaks about you one day, if he doesn't already.

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They don’t know his ex clearly. Nor would she have any reason to be aware of the conversation.

I am sure we’ve all spoken about exes at some point in time.

OP posts:
NimbleDreamer · 02/12/2025 17:19

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 16:42

He’s a good man, respectful job, family values etc. Some people are going on like I am with a criminal which is really dramatic

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Girl you're with a fucking degenerate, sorry.

Most men aren't this disgusting.

Why did you make this thread if you're just going to ignore what people say and continue to defend him?

B1anche · 02/12/2025 17:18

StrangePaint · 02/12/2025 17:16

Senior Rimming Coordinator for the East Midlands?

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🤣 Oh I wish they would bring back the laughing reaction!

StrangePaint · 02/12/2025 17:16

SpigTheFish · 02/12/2025 17:15

Anyone else dying to know what a 'respectful' job is?

Senior Rimming Coordinator for the East Midlands?

TheRealMagic · 02/12/2025 17:16

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 15:56

Rim

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This is such a personal thing to start talking to a stranger about. It feels really invasive somehow to be so graphic with someone unwitting. Imagine how his ex would feel to know that he's telling essentially random women this. That'll be how he speaks about you one day, if he doesn't already.

SpigTheFish · 02/12/2025 17:15

Anyone else dying to know what a 'respectful' job is?

Robogob · 02/12/2025 17:15

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 15:56

Rim

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“Hey meet my boyfriend, the grim rimmer!”

pilates · 02/12/2025 17:14

Yeah that is weird and would put me off

fatphalange · 02/12/2025 17:13

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 16:42

He’s a good man, respectful job, family values etc. Some people are going on like I am with a criminal which is really dramatic

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No, just a common run-of-the-mill perv who wants sexual chat with your mates. Do you count yourself lucky or something that this guy is in employment and seems to have ok values other than trying to steer your mates to think of him being rimmed on first meeting them?

StrangePaint · 02/12/2025 17:11

SpigTheFish · 02/12/2025 17:09

Oh no. I'm afraid he's the sort who cant be taken out in polite society op.

He's alright for fun but 'not for keeps' as they say.

I suppose you could take him out wearing a ball gag.

B1anche · 02/12/2025 17:10

Lurker25 · 02/12/2025 16:42

He’s a good man, respectful job, family values etc. Some people are going on like I am with a criminal which is really dramatic

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I'm really not sure what you were expecting from this thread. Good men do not discuss getting a rim job with a woman they've just met. The fact that you describe it as 'putting his foot in his mouth' speaks volumes. It sounds like your friend has got the measure of him. You need to either raise your standards or accept that you will be justifying his sleazy behaviour time and time again.

SpigTheFish · 02/12/2025 17:09

Oh no. I'm afraid he's the sort who cant be taken out in polite society op.

He's alright for fun but 'not for keeps' as they say.

Zempy · 02/12/2025 17:07

He is a criminal. He drinks and drives.

jajajajajaja · 02/12/2025 16:58

I would find this very creepy and inappropriate, and would dump him immediately. So many levels of ick, your friend must have been appalled.

GreenCandleWax · 02/12/2025 16:57

I would be concerned for your friend. Was she grossed out by the conversation?

outerspacepotato · 02/12/2025 16:50

Good men with respect do not talk to women they're meeting for the first time about rim jobs. Give me a break.

He's an asshole. Maybe he's hoping to isolate you from your friends by being sexually inappropriate with them but guess what? It will work. I'd distance myself from you if you brought this creepy dude along. Creepy men do not improve your life.

If he even to blame his drinking for being so far out of line, he fucking drove.

Some strange family values there.