DH kicking off as I want to uninvite DMIL/DSIL from Christmas Day

That seldom happens by accident.

What on earth would make you say that in this thread?

Males with hands down trousers fondling genitals to be ignored too?

I don’t think her mother in law is married to her sister in law… and I think it’s entirely possible for a mother and daughter to have the same gastric issues.

How strange that both in a married couple have the same intolerance with the same effects. Even more strange that they haven’t modified their diet at all over the decades……

Find out exactly what they are intolerant of and make sure you serve them their Xmas lunch. If they ask for anything else that might upset their stomachs say no. They wil probably gripe about not having things but you can present it as concern for their wellbeing. It would be hard to uninvite them and cause an argument with your DH but you can control their diet and therefore the farting!

The farting debate rumbles on…

Or corks.

Agreed. I think op should say something directly if her dh won't.

I have an etiquette book that says the same; some things are best not "noticed." Anything below the waist, one should not acknowledge nor excuse.

But if people are deliberately drawing attention to themselves, guffawing and trying to out-do one another, I think it's OK to say "Do you mind? That's very off-putting. That lavatory is that way >>"

This whole thread is actually, however, totally beside the point imo.

OP's DH is rude, disrespectful and dismissive of her in ways that go much further than a few audible farts.

I think it's that background that has made the farts upsetting to her - which I can understand. The whole thread took on a different aspect for me when I read her later posts.

FWIW op I had a great aunt who occasionally let one slip in her later years and would NEVER have apologised.

She was exceedingly ladylike in fact, but it was a case of not being so uncouth as to acknowledge it. She would simply carry on demurely as though nothing had happened. My GM liked us all to sit round as a family and exchange gifts one at a time. It took ages. I remember this Great Aunt tottering over to the tree bending over to get a gift when she was quite old and stiff and making an emission while we were all sitting round looking and waiting. She simply turned round and said "Here you are Helen Dear" and passed the gift to another aunt - but her face was red as a beetroot, bless her. But she was a gentle and kind old lady and no-one felt disrespected that she'd let slip and not apologised.

My GM also used to tell me and my cousins, rather starchily, "best not to comment" when one of us farted. I realise they would all have been older than the PILS in this thread, but that was once an attitude some took.

Good option

Nobody laugh!!! It's disgusting.

I bet some people have farted during a Remembrance Day silence. I doubt on purpose, but I am sure it has happened.

I've known girls at school who farted on occasions and then actually cried.

I still think you should get a super soaker and give them a quick skoosh every time they do it.

I would absolutely hate it if I was sitting in a pub or restaurant and the people on the next table were farting. It would genuinely put me off my food. Arrange to meet them for a walk in the fresh air and then eat separately.

@Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim

And many people don’t… (64% in fact!) We just accept and love our family. Smells and all.

I think the 64% is addressing the AIBU of uninviting them for Christmas, not necessarily that everyone is merrily farting in front of each other.

We all love each other in my family and have fun together but somehow manage not to fart in each other's presence - even my 86 yo parents.

Merry Christmas to you too

Watched Motherland Christmas special yesterday to try to feel Christmassy. Julia’s FIL Geoff was farting and calling out to Julia that there was someone at the door. Julia said it was “ British Gas come to sort your bum out Geoff!” 😂

If they do sit and fart, just bring in an air freshener and spray it in their direction

And many people don’t… (64% in fact!) We just accept and love our family. Smells and all.

Merry Christmas. I hope you have lots and lots of laughs 🎅🎄

No I absolutely get that Christmas should be informal and relaxed which is why I don't need it explained to me. Christmas shouldn't be like a funeral OBVIOUSLY. However, it's unnecessary and rude to constantly do break wind in front of your hosts (or anybody really). So if you need to fart, go somewhere else and do it - because many people find it offensive (the gist of this whole thread).

And you don’t seem to get that Christmas should be informal and relaxed and NOT LIKE A FUNERAL! So if you need to fart, fart.

I'm not sure why you aren't getting it? These posters seem to be just using it as an example that if you can manage to 'hold it in' sometimes then you can do so at other times. And as they don't fart in public they do have control and know it's rude. I don't think any posters were actually directly comparing a funeral to Christmas.

It’s a mad comparison 😂😂😂😂
there’s very little I would do on Christmas Day at a funeral.

It’s so funny those of you who think it’s a reasonable comparison. It’s really making me laugh.

“Would you sing Rocking Around the Christmas Tree at a funeral?!?!?!”

Did anyone say that they should? Obviously you act differently at Christmas but still try to hold in farts and If that's impossible either move elsewhere or apologise if that's not possible. Don't competitively fart with another relative knowlingly upsetting the host.

Yes. Because Christmas should NOT be like a funeral so we should act very differently.