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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think death brings out the worst in families, not the best?

54 replies

GraveEtiquetteJay · 01/12/2025 14:24

The performative grief, the inheritance games, the sudden holiness… it’s almost comic. AIBU to think funerals reveal who people really are?

OP posts:
Devilsmommy · 01/12/2025 14:39

It's amazing how many turn into vultures when the house clearance needs to happen or even before the person has died

Didimum · 01/12/2025 14:37

AIBU to think funerals reveal who people really are?

Well, if this is the case, surely it brings out both good and bad if it's who people 'really are'? When my dad died a few years ago, it was a bit of both. Some people were incredibly self-centred about the ordeal and others were amazing supportive. I had a cousin and one of dad's friends who complained to me at every aspect of the funeral arrangements (which they were not contributing to in organisation or financially), and I had others who truly rallied around my mum and my sisters and have continued to support my mum for years afterwards.

Mum2Fergus · 01/12/2025 14:31

I’ve not seen, spoken to or heard from any of my siblings since the last day at DM house doing clearance…that was 5yrs ago.

ConnieHeart · 01/12/2025 14:30

Definitely. Our family split down the middle within weeks of my mum dying. But it was after her funeral