Which one of these parents would you judge more

Probably parent 2 at first glance, but I love seeing kids out playing, looking messy with wild hair and dirty clothes. I think society has moved so far away from that natural childhood freedom. So it depends on what they do.

I try my very best not to judge other people and their parenting but both sound horrendous!

Child 1 - Giving a child a phone at age 6 is mental! Most kids like to play dress up so if you mean that by make up it is ok. It is a phase they grow out of. Usually one tries to encourage kids to put the make up on a dolly rather than on themselves.

Child 2 scruffy looking and bathing once a week is disgusting. Sounds neglectful or a parent who can’t be bothered to set up a routine. Please note other kids and parents will avoid and child will struggle to make friends at school. Also not wearing shoes outside the house is dangerous. Unbrushed hair will get matted and filthy as young children often put food in their hair. Also why allow child to walk around in scruffy clothes with food down it? That is gross and unhygienic. It doesn’t have to be new clothes but they should be washed and clean.

theres a huge room for improvement in both cases

What did you hope to accomplish with this post?

But she's said her hair is really curly and thick, and that sort of hair needs teasing through when wet with lots of conditioner. You can't just drag a brush through it, especially if she's going several days at the weekend without it being brushed at all. I'd suspect it's even less looked after in the holidays.

It wouldn't be possible to make an accurate judgement based an online post by one of the parents. If child B is presentable during the week, I don't really see an issue with their parent. I don't think child A playing games on a phone or wearing perfume is a problem, You Tube and make up could be problematic. The swearing and calling people fat is awful behaviour for a 6 year old, awful at any age but more shocking at 6 as they're old enough to know better but also too young to have picked it up from peers, meaning they probably learned that behaviour at home.

Child A - Is overly exposed to inappropriate content and being treated like a mini adult. This will affect the child's long term development significantly and they are likely to struggle socially and emotionally long term.

Child B- There is an element of neglect given the child only baths once a week and is scruffy.

Both parents should be focusing more on their child's welfare than judging others. As someone who works in education i would be concerned for both children.

Deleted. I didnt read the OP properly

You need to learn how to do thick curly hair.

You don't have to brush it or comb it - in fact it's best not to do that. But it does need care. Look up the curly girl method. I used it for my own curly haired girls and they still use it as adults, as do I.

Children shouldn't be still routinely spilling food down themselves at 6. If food goes on their clothes, change the clothes and launder thoroughly. Ditto paint. If you can afford decent footwear, don't let your child go about in footwear that isn't in good shape. A bath twice a week would be fine - the hair needs wetting and conditioner and can be combed with a wide tooth comb when conditioner is in, then allowed to air dry.

You should be aiming for the happy medium. A dirty child and dirty clothes are not evidence of moral.superiority or superior parenting.

OP has said hair wash once a week. That's all a 6yo needs (unless actually dirty hair). Bath once a week is fine too. Much better for children's skin to have a weekly bath than a daily bath.

Based on the additional information you gave I’d judge both for being judgey idiots.

Well if you’re making is judge I’d choose to judge both.

Why is child B only bathing once a week?? Surely if they are running around the garden barefoot there should be getting a wash. Otherwise those smelly dirty feet will end up in their beds, the sofa, literally everywhere.

Notice you didn’t do a character assassination of child B, only child A got the personality put downs. I would judge you most of all for judging yourself entirely better than the parents of child A. Surely we are all doing our best.

A quick shower only takes 5 minutes. Hair doesn't have to be washed everyday but why would you only give your child a bath once a week (unless there were extenuating circumstances)

But that would mean the OP would have to care for and wash her child. Can't possibly do that 🙄

Look just because the parent that openly judges you has some pretty shitty standards doesn’t mean you’re parent of the year. Whilst she may be worse, you’re not great. Maybe rather than justify your poor parenting by comparing to someone worse, you up your game.

All the more reason to keep on top of it - once a week will make it a big job on curly hair and a massive source of stress.

Maybe come up with hairstyles that will help make it easier during the week, but doing her hair 2x week would be reasonable. My mother used to get really frustrated with my hair and pull so had brushes and combs would break, it would have been sorted a lot easier if she had learned to care for it properly.

NEVER brush curly hair dry!!!!

Curly hair, comb through when wet to de-tangle. When little, it's easier to keep it in plaits to stop it matting.

Neither parent is doing a great job, tbh.

There's no reason for a 6 yo to have food or paint down their front or to go around with disheveled hair or poorly shod. Ditto for the makeup and the phone and the lack of kindness. Perfume is fine.

If you're either one of these parents, do better.

Is child A your sisters child?

You don't bother to wash your kid or comb her hair, or wash her clothes, but you reckon that's OK because you are not Katie Price? You know that being better than Katie Price is not a flex, right?

Do better.

Both seem to be poorly parented in different ways.

Do you think you're the better parent? Doesn't sound like either of you are better than the other.

If you're happy with your parenting then have the confidence in it to not need validation from strangers while trampling on someone else. Be the reflection of who you want others to be. Ok. They've criticised you in private. If they've hit a nerve make some changes. If not then forget it. This 'comparison' is disingenuous and does you no favours.