To ask what you're dreading most about Christmas with your inlaws this year? ( lighthearted )

Dmil will be lovely and a delight to host. My own family, on the other hand, will be more trying.

Dbro talking loudly about himself at the dining table, and not appreciating for one second the fact I've cooked an entirely separate meal for him as he can't tolerate normal Christmas food, dm being critical about me getting things she deems a waste of money (crackers, gifts for the dc that aren't strictly practical, a second pudding beyond the fruit salad that she likes). Dbro talking about how his dislike of female black politicians is nothing to do with racism or sexism, but they just don't "feel competent".

Sometimes dp and I down vodka shots in the kitchen just to get through the middle part of the day.

I am so sorry, that's hard for you all.

No shit, Sherlock!!

My mil died on Friday. I'm not looking forward to any of Christmas as everything is so utterly awful at the moment. It's heartbreaking.

That’s not normal at all

I think I’m the in-law issue. S-I-l and I have nothing in common at all but get on like a house on fire, we don’t see each other often but text most days. So when we see each other we turn into teenagers giggling behind our hands and whispering in jokes. She is an angel from heaven, knows I barely drink and don’t drink wine so last year made a bottle of cocktail just for me. We were missing when dinner was called, eventually found in the garage by one of our teenagers. We got a row at dinner and separated which we found hilarious and our children couldn’t believe. We took the dogs out for a walk before pudding because “actually we’re not teenagers and you can’t stop us”. We missed pudding because we were drinking in the shed with 3 dogs. DH and BIL will do anything for peace and know who they’re married too so just took the dogs away and left us to it.

apparently she’s leaving the bottle of cocktails in the garage this year in advance. My now 18 ds can’t wait to join in. Im probably going to get coal in my stocking.

I’m dreading all of it because my dad has just died and I don’t want to talk about it, nor do I know how to get out of talking about it without being incredibly awkward and uncomfortable. Plus side, they’re coming to us so I can hide in the kitchen and I know the food will be how I like it!

Oops. Missed the light-hearted bit. In that case it's the bit my lovely in laws aren't inviting us but aren't asking to be invited and I do not know what to do.

I’m with @Netcurtainnelly after my year with the in-laws 😁 sorry not all that lighthearted 🎄🎄

@BossaNovaOnAllNight being the only family member left out of the family gift exchange orchestrated by my spiteful sister-in-law. And having my name left off our family Christmas card (yes, her again!)

My in laws are lovely. They are far away so we stay for 2 nights. One night is fine, by night 2 I'm overstimulated by all the people as I have a small family and the kids running around, plus even though tis Christmas there is a lack of food .... I take a lunchbox 🤣.

Also the constant repetition of previous boring conversations and having to be 'on' all the time as they can't just sit in silence!

I love how my in-laws feel so comfortable that they sit for 7 hours waiting to be served whilst ignoring their grandchildren. It’s so nice they feel that they can do nothing for the whole day while DH and I run around like headless chickens and barely get any time with our kids?’!!

My sister is spending Xmas with her DP alone this year so I have to host all the boring old people. ☹️

My GM has 3 fave topics of conversation: why can’t we call Muslims Mohammedans anymore, why can’t we call Black people Coloured anymore, and in my day we just smacked sexual predators around the head with our handbags and they didn’t give us any trouble.

One year I swear I will invite a Black Muslim person to join us for Xmas to better explain things to her. Possibly smacking her round the head with her own handbag is a step too far…

Yes to this. Having deaf 80 somethings shuffling round in a kitchen they don’t know isn’t helpful.

I once tasked them with laying the table. Everything was on the table. You all know how this ends.

Well Xmas with my side of the family always always always end up with someone arguing with my 3rd brother. He’s a knob and starts petty arguments with anyone and everyone.
Xmas is my sisters birthday, so she demands a full Xmas dinner and everyone must be there. We are not even Christian.
She has has a Xmas birthday party for the last 41 years.
Last year it was me that got chosen by my 3rd brother and after the huge argument I refused to eat dinner.

My in laws side is another nightmare. My Mil has severe OCD, she always can’t stand any smells in her house so constant windows open during cooking, serving and eating.
My Fil can’t stand the cold so we have central heating, fan heater and he recently bought a bloody butane gas heater all for the one living room.
So you’re either too hot in one part of the house or too flipping cold.

The OCD does mean she doesn’t allow anyone to do the washing up etc. But the constant criticising of my parenting goes beyond a joke. My son knows how to play his grandma so I just get nagged at for no reason.
My Fil has this habit of fussing over nothing. Like he wants me to do something for the kids and he wants it done yesterday. I’m talking silly things like she’s hit take her cardigan off, do it, do it, do it.
Why don’t you feed my grandson more food, do you meagre his food. Put more food on his plate, add more food now, add it now, add it now.
My grandaughter is crying, why why why why why is she crying. You have to do what’s he’s asking you but at the same time don’t stop what he’s already asked you to do.
Both Mil and Fil overuse my name too when I’m at their house. I swear to god, they must call me with demands from living room to kitchen like 200 times in a few hours.
Do I run to the OCD maniac or to the overly fussy old man? Lol.

I would rather stay at home but the kids get to have fun so I sacrifice my happiness for them wherever we end up for Xmas.

I'm dreading having to leave their house after boxing day dinner. They make the best food and they are wonderful hosts. I'll be completely spoilt and not lift a finger while I'm there.

I'd rather go home early.

The ‘faff’ as always is what I’m dreading. They’re such lovely people, but everything has to be a little more difficult or complicated than it needs to be and I just want a quiet, simple Xmas at home.

Why is finding theft from a small business immoral an autism thing?

That’s a very normal response.

My FIL will not have anyone speak when they’re eating a meal

You literally eat all your meals with them, even Christmas dinner, in complete silence, just listening to plate scraping and chewing noises?!

This is completely bizarre - so authoritarian and joyless. DS had a schoolfriend whose mother was the same, they were all forbidden to talk at mealtimes. No surprise he and his brothers preferred to eat at other people’s houses!

Why do you go) I dont get it

All the tat they buy my kids which doesn’t get played with or broken straight away. End up doing a tip run soon after Christmas.

I miss my in laws . I was well blessed with them. ( miss my parents too).. my daughters wife says im a brilliant mum in law.. n that she loved me to bits.. we sometimes go shopping together just the two of us.

MIL will ask me for the seventy hundredth time "what is your job again?". I will answer "Director of Communications and Engagement" again. She will then move on to "it's a strange sort of job isn't it? I'm not sure that anyone ever did a job like that in my day" and then she will mutter "strange job" at intervals throughout the day. (Not my actual job title BTW but fairly close). She has done this for the 2.5 years that I have had this job.

Both DM and MIL will barely eat anything and profes to be astounded that anyone could eat as much as the rest of us (eating a normal sized meal...).

DM will be upset that we don't watch the King's speech. DMIL will be scandalised that we don't go to church on Christmas morning (because we go to midnight communion and the Christmas morning service isn't much of a service so we get our spiritual fix at midnight).

DMIL will insist on talking about radio 4 and poetry to DD's BF who is already terrified that we are 'too posh'.

This year we also have a random overseas student from DS's university house as she can't afford to go home for Christmas. She's from Japan and I genuinely don't know what she is going to make of us!

On the plus side we are going away for new year so I only have a few days to hold it all together for!

2weeks! I couldn’t stay in someone’s else’s house for 2 weeks. I’d go mad!