To ask what you're dreading most about Christmas with your inlaws this year? ( lighthearted )

GET OUT OF MY FUCKING KITCHEN.

Thats been 3 hours now of breakfast, constant cups of fucking tea that’s left to go cold and taking about 4 tablets.

STOP OFFERING TO HELP BY CHUCKING MY GOOD CHINA INTO HOT SUDS ON TOP OF LE CREUSET PANS.

FUCK OFF.

Thanks Mumsnet. I needed that 🙃

Nothing. My ILs have passed now, and I don't have to put up with them (so has DH) which is just as well as I recently had an operation and I've had very little sleep from pain and I'm going to have to fight not to be grumpy from tiredness today.

One of the things that used to wind me up if we went to theirs on Christmas Day was MIL being a martyr in the kitchen (but refusing offers of help) and then, when serving dinner, she would serve FIL first, then DH, SIL etc. They'd all get huge portions. I'd be served last and be lucky if there was much left.

The noise! My in laws are lovely by the way but sooo many of them! Usually there are at least 3-4 conversations going on at any given time simultaneously and my head can’t take it. I always end up with a massive headache after.

Noisy shits
Having unmuted chats in the middle of the night
Snoring penetrating walls and doors.
Noisy shits.
Having a newspaper read to us.
Looking at things that aren't in perfect condition and saying oh dear.
Noisy shits.

I can't even get pissed to drown or dull this as that just compounds my sleeping problems, turning me into a sweating, pissing (in the correct location) mess.

We are away with my IL’s and they both do this. It’s driving me to distraction. I have asked if they could be on silent and offered to lend them my headphones but both suggestions were rebuffed and so they carry on. Then I retreat to my room, only to be asked what’s wrong when I rejoin them. Explaining is met with a tinkly laugh and so it carries on. We go home on Saturday. Can’t wait!!

@Christmaslogistics
Please please update us boxing day. Your in-laws and their dogs are going to be my highlight

I should also add that my mum spends a lot of time scrolling on her phone. She is incapable of wearing headphones so i will be subjected to rubbish music and facebook adverts at full volume.

Your not one of my siblings are you? 😅

And similarly to you, if you don’t like this thread, don’t look at it

The same small talk questions that they ask every bloody time we see them:

• how’s the house?
• how’s the car?
• how’s work?

With no ability to come back with anything meaningful, no experience, no wisdom, nothing, just another question then asked. It’s PAINFUL!

Not sure what’s lighthearted about slagging people off. If you don’t like them, don’t see them 🤷‍♀️

Same same, I'm terrible at day drinking. I end up doing it because everyone else is and then feeling a bit rubbish all day.

I am dreading getting called miserable because i don't like drinking wine in the afternoon. I do like a glass of wine but i am much happier having a glass of wine in the evening when i am watching call the midwife. If i drink too early i just end up feeling like crap so i don't get anything done. I am also dreading listening to my mum's endless monologues.

The standard obituary style musings of FIL. We dont get through any meal without a run down of deaths.
I think he's just going for last man standing as is secretly pleased with himself!

Not the outlaws but my own dm. She’s coming for a week. Shes great but it’s her phone..it’s so fucking loud. Drives me mad! She has all the sounds on so really loud and annoying keyboard clicking/beeping etc. If she gets a text she tells us all who it is and what they want, reads out the text etc.
I’m going to need lots of wine.

Where to start? 😂

MIL- Lovely bubbly and generous but source of many unwanted parenting “tips” and occasional comments like “shouldn’t DD be out of night nappies by now?” (she’s 10, autistic and wears DryNites).

FIL- Always handing out drinks and food whether they’re wanted or not with “go on - you’ll miss out if you don’t!” and regular comments about the changing demographics of their area. Thinks that because his parents are from Jamaica it gives him a free pass to comment negatively on the fact that in the last 20 years their area has become majority-Muslim (having previously been majority-white with a sizeable Caribbean population).

Genrerally good fun in small
doses though so could be worse!

Last time we spent Christmas at the in laws, it was freezing. They never put the heating on and I always keep my coat on.
That last time, MIL noticed I still had my long puffer coat on. So she said "come and sit by the fire, you'll warm up" and she began to rub her hands together in front of the gas fire in a 'ooh cosy warm' gesture.
The fire wasn't on. She just had the coal effect lights on.

Both your families sound utterly and fantasticly bonkers.
Do you sit there looking for the hidden cameras. That's what gets me through visits with my in laws. I imagine it's being filmed for comedy purposes.

@BossaNovaOnAllNight I'm fortunate that my in-laws & parents get along well enough to celebrate many holidays together, but my mom has some contrived form of orthorexia (and other mental health issues, to put it diplomatically) which complicates get-togethers; my DH's mum generally entertains & does a fantastic job of it with plenty of food options, but my family always has to awkwardly explain that my mom "can't" eat anything, even things like celery/carrots laid out as hors d'oeuvres and my poor MIL is always (justifiably) bewildered every time🫣

P.S. I hope I don't come across as insensitive to people with dietary issues, in my mother's case I'm 99% sure there's some sort of Munchausen-esque affliction at play, her "diagnoses" are constantly shifting, and she's always eager to wax poetic at length about her latest restrictions...hard to explain, but the first example that comes to mind is a time at a restaurant when she interrogated our poor server about how long the cheddar cheese in one dish was aged for 😓 apparently she can only eat cheddar cheese if it's aged for 10+ months 😅 so that does throw a spanner into many a holiday interaction with the ILs!!

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

It’s our first Xmas with the baby

We’re at my husbands family this year

I’m predicting the day will involve the standard events when we go round any given Sunday. My brother in law will be drunk. My mother in law will be squawking about her health, wanting to hold the baby more, that I’m “hogging” the baby by breastfeeding and that no matter how long we are there that we won’t have stayed long enough.

Thankfully my husband backs me up when I put my foot down over the baby and my FIL is delightful so I’ll probably be hiding in the kitchen with those two.

Oh and my husband and I will get very competitive over a game of trivial pursuit - I’m the current reigning champ and intend to keep it that way!

I remember my mother asking for a lift to Homebase.
We spent an hour and a half in there and came out with one bloody plastic bucket.

No, I didn't miss it and I don't get why you and your SIL behave so obnoxiously.

You are guests and should act accordingly. If you and your SIL want to get drunk and act like idiots then you should meet up some other time, not spoil other people's Christmasses.

Your husbands must be mortified.

This is my family.
My mum especially, went shopping with her and my sister last weekend and mum found something to buy for dad.
She couldn't just buy it, she had to tell us three times all the reasons why it would be a good thing to buy. Three times.

I'm dreading them not being here. This is the third Xmas without MIL and the first without FIL
There will only be five of us for most of the day and that feels really empty (sorry to lower the mood)