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To be so annoyed with bloody paternalistic NHS

261 replies

MyKindHiker · 30/11/2025 14:34

I am a lifetime migraine sufferer and as I'm getting closer to menopause they are getting worse in frequency and severity. At least half of all days I wake up with some form of aura, go through packs of nurofen and sumatriptan. Anyways it's been years since I considered any intervention other than just taking meds when one coming on (not necessary as not that frequent through adulthood), but I gather from talking to others there are some really effective meds available now which can prevent them entirely.

Go to GP who looks at recent bloodwork done to check my hormones and says as I'm still fertile and having periods, he can't prescribe in case I get pregnant while on them. I explain I have 2 kids and don't want more. In fact, can't technically have more anyway due to birth injury with second. And husband has had vasectomy to prevent accidental pregnancy as due to birth injury I could get pregnant but couldn't carry baby to anywhere near term. Which is beside the point as I do not want any more kids anyway.

Anyway doc says I still can't have the meds and the rule is for women of childbearing age the rule is they need to go to a special clinic with a 12 month waiting list and do all the steps first (elimination diet etc... I have TRIED THIS OVER 30 YEARS) and prove I'm not pregnant.

I mean what is with these people? If I was a man, I would have just got the meds to prevent a very debilitating condition. But because I'm a woman I can't have the meds 'in case' I become pregnant as though I'm just a uterus on legs who can't think for myself and decide not to become pregnant? Why is my word not enough that I will not have an affair with a non-vasectomied man and get myself up the spout. Ridiculous.

OP posts:
MyKindHiker · 30/11/2025 14:43

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Yes, the pill. They stopped prescribing when I was 37. So that's when husband got snipped.

OP posts:
Extragreen · 30/11/2025 14:42

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MyKindHiker · 30/11/2025 14:41

Kendodd · 30/11/2025 14:39

I assume the meds cause birth defects (?)
Can you have your tubes tied and go back?

But that's major surgery - husband had a vasectomy so I wouldn't need to do that. Surely my own free will to not get pregnant should be sufficient?

The reality is if through some fluke of nature I got pregnant, I would need to terminate anyway as I couldn't carry a baby past first trimester.

OP posts:
GeorgeClooneyshouldhavemarriedme · 30/11/2025 14:41

Naws · 30/11/2025 14:37

I don't understand what you're not understanding.

That men can't get pregnant?

Could you have a hysterectomy to prevent pregnancy, therefore putting you on an even footing with men?

No, you are missing the point.

She is an adult woman, capable of managing her own fertility who should not need to prove to the medical system that she is not or will not become pregnant.

And yes it's an effing disgrace that a man in the same circumstances wouldn't have to wait at all. The solution would be a simple waiver form where you sign saying that you understand the risks and accept the consequences.

JamMam11 · 30/11/2025 14:40

Extragreen · 30/11/2025 14:35

Are you on contraception?

unfortunately generally contraception makes migraines worse/more frequent so it’s very much a catch 22 to have that be a factor. I’m so sorry OP this is awful. I do not understand why we, as adult women, cannot be trusted to take medication we need to help us just live and not get pregnant!
I know so few people who have babies “by accident” many are unexpected as in we weren’t trying but we weren’t doing all we could to prevent it but this makes it sound like you have 12 unplanned children and can’t be trusted not to go again!!

Kendodd · 30/11/2025 14:39

I assume the meds cause birth defects (?)
Can you have your tubes tied and go back?

MyKindHiker · 30/11/2025 14:38

Naws · 30/11/2025 14:37

I don't understand what you're not understanding.

That men can't get pregnant?

Could you have a hysterectomy to prevent pregnancy, therefore putting you on an even footing with men?

If I could just mail order a hysterectomy I would do. But it's not that easy, you can't just ask for one just because.

OP posts:
MyKindHiker · 30/11/2025 14:37

Extragreen · 30/11/2025 14:35

Are you on contraception?

No - in your 40s (I have been told) you are no longer allowed the contraceptive pill due to hormones and risks. Hence husband has had a vasectomy. Which is contraception. And if I had an affair with anyone (which I won't), I would use barrier methods. Or take the morning after pill.

OP posts:
Naws · 30/11/2025 14:37

I don't understand what you're not understanding.

That men can't get pregnant?

Could you have a hysterectomy to prevent pregnancy, therefore putting you on an even footing with men?

Extragreen · 30/11/2025 14:36

If you were on contraception (they can’t factor in your husband’s vasectomy as they look at you as a separate entity!) they would prescribe

Extragreen · 30/11/2025 14:35

Are you on contraception?