Have I ruined the last “magic” xmas

nonsense OP

can you make Christmas decorations with your children? Go for a walk in the woods and get greenery for the house? Decorate the house? Make hot chocolate and sing carols? Go for a walk to see Christmas lights?

Can you afford some presents for each? At their age the do not need to be expensive.

Watch a Christmas movie on Christmas Day and have some games ready.

no need to go to Lapland

My LO (nearly 4) and DNephew (just 5) have worked out amongst themselves that Santa isn’t real, it happened a few weeks ago and both of them are absolutely certain. It’s quite cute actually, I’m not sad about it. Fingers crossed neither of them spill to their friends.

I vaguely remember telling my mum Santa Claus wasn’t real, and neither was the tooth fairy or Easter bunny. I was probably 5/6.

On the other hand I have a young second cousin, still absolutely convinced Santa is as real as you or I. He is 10!

It can vary greatly. I think how much you lean into it and take it seriously yourself has an effect. SIL and I love the holidays but don’t really focus on the Santa aspect, the wrapping paper is out and we’ve done Christmas shopping with the kids. They’re clever enough to connect the dots and we didn’t lie because they were proud of themselves for figuring it out. We could’ve doubled down and defended Santa's honour, if it was more important to us, to keep that part of the magic alive.

Even if we had money to burn I dont think I could justify Lapland! We are going to Centre Parcs for 4 nights in January and it's actually cheaper!
I saw on social media (I know) someone saying that as they got older they realised the magic of Christmas was just a parent who loved them and wanted to make it special. If you are over stretching yourself your children will pick up on the stress.

Honestly the word “magic” in relation to Christmas is just so overdone it’s just urrgh.

Utter consumerism. Christmas is about winding down, time together, bake/cook/look at lights, open some presents. Nobody needs to go to Lapland, no “magic” resides in “experiences” in Santa’s drawing room for £29.99.

I don’t understand your reasoning.
What have the theatre and light displays got to do with believing in Father Christmas?

Just do the usual - letter up the chimney, mince pie, cherry and a carrot left out, fill the stocking with the best treats you can afford, and Bob’s your uncle?

Ahh mine still want santa ro come are 7 and 12. Although the 12 year old hasnt believed for about 2 year, he plays along.
You have plenty of years left I reckon.
Have you got any money for bits to unwrap. Pound shop are great for stuff to bulk out the presents like a colouring book and pens or a squishy. And facebook market place. I got some new lego sets on there a few christmases ago. We got a batman bike for 15 quid and i fixed it up with some plack touch up paint a few years ago too. Charity shops for a puzzle and a few books.
You domt have to spend a lot!!

I dunno, I have the most wonderful Christmas memories and we were dirt poor. Drive to an area you know have great lights, bake some Christmas cookies and then watch a Christmas film, let them decorate the tree while you play Christmas songs, do some Christmas crafts, attend a free carol service.

I'm sure they will still have a magical Christmas. Kids want our time and attention, not money.

My eldest was telling me nice things she remembered from her childhood. One of them was me buying her the occasional gingerbread man for her from the local bakery with her. Cost about one euro or so! Kids remember you doing things with them! And these things don't have to cost a bomb!

Tune into channel 5 every afternoon.the xmas schmaltz does not need lapland. Your time attention and simple crafts etc will be more than magical

Breathe @Cantbloodyrememberthenameonthread

We have two teenagers now 17, 15, and what they love about Christmas was not the paid for expensive presents or outings.

First of all there are many Christmas lights you can see for free, shopping centres, local houses that really go to town.

What our two still insist upon......
It's the stuff you do at home

Muppets Christmas Carol, last film Christmas Eve, a must.

Making home made sausage rolls on Christmas Eve evening (sausage meat and bought puff pastry)
They like a complicated gingerbread house construction - none of those easy sets for us we get the graph paper out!

Christmas "magic' isn't bought it's created with love.

As a disclaimer, our two never really believed in Santa, we never did Elf on a Shelf, taking them to see "Santa" was an utter disaster and a low point of most young Christmases

They just wanted our undistracted time, a new game to play, crackers at the table and no one saying no to chocolate. Honestly the cost of the presents, trips out, forced magic, they hated.

She’s 9 and still believes as do her friends

I was older than that when I stopped believing in Santa - but I still go through the motions and only put presents under the tree last thing christmas eve ! The magic stays with you.

Instead of light displays you can go and look at the lights on houses near you - there's always at least one Christmas House where they go nuts! And go to carols or christingle at your local church, you don't have to be churchgoers.

People don't go carolling anymore - why not organise a carolling night with school friends and parents and knock on doors singing for your figgy puddings?

The old ways don't need lots of money. Make Christmas pudding (don't forget to make a wish and add a piece of silver), make paper chains, Christmas cards and other decorations. Gingerbread men and Christmas movies. Walks to collect greenery for a wreath. And check out the ticket prices for your local panto.

I'm with everyone else. I remember Christmas being completely magical as a kid, and things like light trails, specific Christmas days out etc didn't really exist. We used to love going and seeing the high street lights in the local town, garden centres etc. I do remember one amazing Christmas going up to London one evening, but if we did 'spend money ' that's not what has stuck. Looking at the lights and the shop windows is what has stuck. None of that cost anything. You can still have a magical Christmas spending very little. I'm sorry you're struggling right now, but please don't give into some guilt induced spiral about a magical Christmas that involves spending lots of money.

Loads of fun stuff you can do for less. Hot choc (with squirty cream and sprinkles if funds allow) and a film on TV. Board games with snacks (Christmas themed ones). Crafts to make (paper chains and Christmas music. Christmas cooking, dressing up etc. Take silly pics on your phone.

Lots of the fun Christmas things you mentioned up thread are mostly fun for the adults. I mean they are fun for the kids too. But kids love other things, smaller things as well.

Wait for a cold, crisp day and go foraging in the woods for stuff to make a wreath. Special prize if the kids find Holly with berries on.

You are definitely going to give your DC a magical Christmas with all the suggestions made here by PP. You can't buy a magical Christmas and it's definitely not to be found in Lapland (I have been it was lovely, but it wasn't as special as our Christmas traditions).

Go to the library and get The Grinch out to read with DC. Remember that Christmas can't be bought in a store, Christmas is actually something much more.

This is a brilliant post 😊

I can't remember believing, I had just turned 5 (autumn birthday). Christmas was still magical!

Honestly what do you remember from when you were 6 ?
I remember family Christmases with grandparents and cousins. Don’t remember if I went to see Santa or not.

I grew up completely skint and Christmas was still magical! You don't have to spend a fortune to have a good time. We used to go for walks to look at everyone's Christmas lights and give them all a score, go to the church carol concert and church feast evenings (they did a few over Christmas, never occured to me as a kid that it was because we were poor, I just enjoyed the nice stew and music!), the garden centre Santa's grotto (I'm pretty sure it was £1 a child to see Santa though I've no idea if anywhere is that cheap these days - the pub near me is doing breakfast with Santa for £12 a kid though which I think is quite good value!), my mam was a pro at making Christmas quizzes, Christmas scavenger hunts and Christmas treasure hunts (great way to drag one present out into an hour long adventure round the house to find it! She also did ones in the run up where the "prize" was some chocolate sprouts or something, which was the most exciting thing ever as a kid but probably cost 50p at the corner shop).

The most important thing is that you're together. I know, trite as fuck, but it's true.

There are lots of Magical’ low cost and free things you can do. Download the NORAD Santa tracker and watch Santa’s prep and present delivering - we still do this and my eldest is 25!
Make some reindeer food (oats and glitter) and sprinkle outside. Walks / car trips to local light displays. Christmas films and favourite snacks under a duvet. Above all be kind to yourself , your DC will remember your love and presence above all xx

Christmas isn’t all about spending money on attractions etc, it is what you make of it to be magical.

Can you take them to free events? Like local town Christmas lights switch on? Is there a posh shop or garden centre that has Christmas themed departments/lights that you can go and look at?

Could you watch Christmas films/read Christmas books together as you count down to Christmas?

Does their school have a Christmas fete with a Fathet Christmas? That might be a cheaper event to visit?

Could you make Christmas decorations/mince pies/cakes at home with them?

When mine were little we used to walk/drive around local area to look at the lights on people’s houses the night before Christmas, and come home to have hot chocolate with marshmallows. Mine used to love that.

i hope you can find some ways of being creative in making Christmas special.

I fear you have drunk the Kool-aid.

Have a nice, low-key, home-based Christmas and don’t worry about Lapland next year (or any other year).

Having a wonderful Christmas has absolutely nothing to do with ‘believing’, and it’s both ridiculous and very sad that parents set themselves up for this nonsense.

Christmas is beautiful and fun regardless. My son is 7 and has always been very sceptical of Father Christmas and he still adores Christmas. Me and my sister never really believed in him either and still love it. It’s one of my favourite times of year and I don’t bother with ‘magic’ either. I bother with good times, family and food.

Take the pressure off yourself and embrace Christmas for all that it is, not the big guy in red.

OP, did you have a happy childhood? Did you find Christmas exciting? And did you do even half the stuff that you’ve mentioned in your OP?

That Lapland/days out stuff isn’t what makes Christmas magic for kids! It’s just late stage capitalism!

Honestly, kids don’t want to be bustled from photo op to photo op - the idea of Christmas is exciting enough for them.