Have I ruined the last “magic” xmas

I’m intentionally scaling back this year, not really for financial reasons. When I think back to my own childhood, there was such a big emphasis on material things - I would wake up on Christmas Day to a literal mound of presents that would take me hours to unwrap. My daughter isn’t really one for things, she’d much rather hang out with me or make something. So this year for her main present I’ve made her an arts and crafts trolley. I know she’ll be delighted with it, and it’s something that we can do together. Over the holidays we will create something, drink hot chocolate and watching cheesy Christmas films in the background. Connection over consumption is the way forward.

I noticed last year that the expensive flashy light up etc presents don’t get played with (my kids are 2,4 and 6). Things they do play with are stuff like play dough, paints, crafts, blocks etc which are cheap and you could go to second hand shops for bigger stuff, your 6 year old is not going to notice if it’s new or not. This year I’m getting my kids to make presents for extended family instead of buying stuff. I got some baggies and bows of Amazon and some clay and paints and my kids are going to make little hanging decorations, and also cookies/cakes etc. They will love it, it’s a lot cheaper than buying lots of stuff, plus im going to get the elf to bring the supplies so a few days of not having to worry about what to do with him 😆. I don’t know about your area about here there is lots of free/cheap Christmas events.

My children have never particularly cared about any of the Christmas themed days out, lights shows, theatre I’ve taken them to. Consequently we’re doing none of that this year (they’re 7 and 10) and will enjoy decorating the tree, eating mince pies, and listening to Christmas songs in the run up to Christmas. I appreciate every child is different but I don’t think these expensive Christmas activities are that great

DS8 shows no sign of not believing yet, and is as excited as ever. When you said last magic Christmas I thought they might be 10 or 11- you have loads of magic time left don't worry! Anyway lots of Christmas magic can be had for free or cheap- we have a local Santas grotto thats £6.50 a child. There are some free Christmas craft activities on in the local museum and library. And you can do the baking cookies/ christmas movies at home for cheap. My kids love making paper chains to decorate. I'm sure there will be the usual celebration things at school and any clubs like brownies they go too. At 6 the most magic thing you can give them is your time. 6 is the age I first read the Christmasaurus chapter book to my son and he loved it- we did a bit every night through December. You can pick up copies cheaply second hand if you are budgeting.

In reality if the go to a multi cultural school at least one of their class mates will have told them, even 25 years ago this was the case. Often children pretend they don’t know as they think they won’t get presents.

Love this and completely agree!!

My DD is 10 (yr 5) and still believes in Santa, as do her friends, although they are starting to ask more questions so I suspect this might be our last year.

@HeyThereDelila thats quite a dramatic order! Why not fgs.
Why so keen to perpetuate a lie? Presumably you arent happy if your kids tell lies?
My eldest asked for the truth when he was five, I told him. He said “yeah I thought so, makes sense” and carried on playing. No big deal. He was pleased to know there was no stranger coming into the house on Christmas Eve. It was reassuring.
Christmas “magic” doesn’t need lies.

You don't have to spend a lot of money to have a magical Christmas. You might even find that just doing things together without all the expensive trapping is much nicer.
But also it's not the case that the magic stops by the time they are 7. I loved Christmas with my children every year they were living at home.
You make the magic yourselves

We used to go to garden centre. A d buy a couple of ornaments,(still do!) Look at ho ho ho houses.as DD called them .hot chocolate and making paper chains Christmas films all good

Don’t panic, 6 is very young still and you have lots of “magic” years left. Mine are 10, 8 and 6 and still love the magic. Not entirely sure 10 year old still believes but he hasn’t said he doesn’t. His younger siblings def still do believe.

i grew up in the 80s and 90s, and Christmas felt very magical to me (even after I’d stopped believing in Santa). My parents never booked anything extra for us to do in the run up to Christmas. There was so much festive stuff going on anyway: advent calenders, school nativity, school Christmas fair which sometimes included a sit on Father Christmas’ knee and a very budget (shit) gift 😂, my parents put up some christmas lights in our outdoor tree, we bought a christmas tree and decorated it, Christmas Eve stockings and Mass, left out a mince pie for the big man, then stockings and presents in the morning although these were in moderation tbh compared to the hauls kids get today.

the magic came from hearing Christmas songs on the radio, seeing lights up down everyone’s streets and down the high street, doing Christmas crafts and stuff at school. I think we had a school Christmas meal or party?

my point is there is a Christmas feeling about which is magical no matter whether you book the Lapland tips, expensive “meet Santa” experiences, etc etc or not. I would bet your children will get just as much magic from watching a Christmas movie with you and decorating cookies than they will going to Lapland. As parents we need bigger and better experiences to wow ourselves but kids don’t see it that way. I’m sure your 6 year old will have a magical year and will never know it has been a cheap one compared to what you wanted to do xx

My eldest is 9 and shows no sign of not believing. I think at her age I strongly suspected, but it didn’t make Christmas less magical. We hugely cut down on big Christmassy days out when I realised they were just too overwhelming for the kids, we really stick to the simple things now that many PP have already mentioned, most are free or inexpensive.

I echo what other say. Christmas is way more than expensive things, children, esp at age of 6 are happy at the very thought of xmas! And having a happy mum (rather than a regretful, sad mum) will be the best. Do things together, put Christmas song on the radio while making things together, have a silly dance. Make fairy cakes, decorate them all christmassy, paint paper chains, make tree decorations. Go for walks, looking at the lights, collect cones and spray them gold when get home. There's loads of things to do that don't cost the earth. Enjoy the time together, may even be one of the best ones yet rather than rushing around and feeling the pressure?

About 7 as you say. But why does that mean the end to magic? I still find Christmas magical and I’m 63 and usually doing most of the work!
We never did anything other than maybe go to a panto, if we visited Santa he was attached to where we bought the tree. Carol service and nativity plays they did at school.
I used to feel bad that after my DH passed away (kids were 4 and 6), that it was too quiet at Christmas - I was used to having guests and extended family during the holidays. That all stopped then (my family live abroad, and we did, up until the pandemic, go every other year). However as I was telling my kids ‘sorry it’s just us for Christmas’ this year as my son couldn’t get the time off work to go abroad to stay with family, they both seemed fine and said they enjoyed the ‘quiet’ Christmases as much as the ones with other family and guests. So I’m sure your kids will find this Christmas, and many more to come, magical. It’s not about what’s under the tree, but who you spend it with.

DD is 12 and in year 8. She has only just admitted that she knows FC isn’t real. She said she had suspicions last year (Yr7) but she definitely believed all the way through primary school. You may have a few more years left yet OP!

Absolutely do not do what @Okiedokie123 suggested. Please do not tell your DC Father Christmas isn’t real.

It’s absolutely fine to just say FC has more children to bring gifts for this year so everyone is getting less. Or don’t say anything! A 6 year old won’t notice anyway (I know because I have a 6 year old).

Ebay is your friend for good second hand gifts.

Christmas was exciting and wonderful when I was a small child in the 60s and we had absolutely none of the outings and events that happen today. We looked at the lights in the town centres and the shop windows( they were actually more impressive in those days! ) We made biscuits, sausage rolls and wonky table decorations . You can make' the magic' without loads of money. Children love Christmas whether they 'believe ' or not.

Don’t worry, even when kids stop believing, it doesn’t stop the magic. Play loads of board games, give them your time and attention, that’s what they really want. I used to beat myself up because we went camping every year while my sisters and their kids went to Disneyland but listening to what they say now, my kids had the better time. Christmas can still be great without going to Lapland.

I teach 7/8 year olds. They all very much still believe.

You don't need money to believe in Santa, just get a small present from him, you don't need to be going to all sorts of places, a few fun Christmas films, a homemade cake, a small tree that you decorate together. A local town Christmas tree lighting event, even just looking at local houses that are decorated. Don't stress.

Most still believe until age 11 or so.

YABU. Christmas “magic” doesn’t come from light shows. Your DC is 6.

Go out after dark and look at the Christmas lights in your town/village. Do a local Father Christmas grotto at a garden centre etc (inexpensive), go to church Christingle and crib services or Carol services (free and meaningful), if you have National Trust membership go to one of the local houses decorated for Christmas (free or borrow a friend’s membership card). Make a gingerbread house at home or make salt dough tree decorations (cost only the price of a bag of plain flour, Google how to do it). Bake some Christmassy biscuits or a chocolate Yule log. Watch his school nativity play. Go to the school Christmas fair with him. Invite a few of his friends round for a playdate once you’ve decorated the tree.

Is he going to the panto with school? If so, that’s plenty! Honestly, you are worrying for no reason at all.

Present-wise ask family or friends to chip in for his big present (which does not need to be expensive) and then just do a few stocking fillers. Get a chicken instead of a turkey and watch The Snowman on channel 4. That’s a lovely Christmas right there.

If you can afford an elf on the shelf they are lots of fun (for children 😁) and definitely add magic

Realistically, things can't be that bad if you're thinking ahead to Lapland for 2026. 🤦🏼‍♀️

I found the opposite was true.

When they were little and believed, everything was magical and fun.
It was all cheap things - looking at people’s homes lit up, leaving the mince pie out for Santa etc

Its when they get older and stop believing that you feel you need to pay out to make them have a good time.