Have I ruined the last “magic” xmas

Try listening to White Wine in the Sun by Tim Minchin .... he has something to say about the real meaning of Christmas.

You have until high school. Even if they hear rumours before then they’ll convince themselves he’s real in their heart of hearts. Have the most amazing time in Lapland!

My DS is 8 and still believes, my DD was 10 when she stopped. Our favourite cheap magic maker is to empty a tin of prunes on our patio on xmas eve, the reindeer pooed in our garden 🙈🙈

All adults in our household and we have a magical Christmas.

Goodness my eleven year is a very firm believer still. I was surprised when he announced that he knows he is real and listed all the reasons why. I feel happy and guilty at the same time. He is a bright, logical, top of the class kid so I will hang on to this one last Christmas of Santa…..

My DD was 8, but the boys were much older. They'll love making reindeer food, you can make cookies with a window (a fox's glcaier mint) and gingerbread house) or just go to a farm park nearby,
No need to spend too much cash

Very unreasonable to equate the magic of Christmas with spending loads of cash and saying you will bounce back next year with Lapland. Your eldest is still very young. Unless you teach them to want expensive experiences young children are most happy with simple activities that prioritise connecting with others (parents, relatives etc) and giving them time and attention.
My eldest is 12 and believes, without ever bringing her to Lapland!!. (And i haven't particularly encouraged her being so innocent). My children's favourite December activity is baking a Yule log with me. We drive around and look at lights. Our city council does a cheap light display we have been to a few times. We visit the crib, take part in a musical event to raise money for a food drive, watch Christmas movies, cut paper into snowflakes. All free.
Please dont raise your children to consider spending money a measure of fun and magic.

Blimey op my children are 7yrs and 10yrs and both still believe (the 10 year old may be the last as she's very suspicious now 😆).

But honestly Op don't worry about the expensive things, my children have never done anything like that and love Christmas! They love all the traditions, Christmas decorations, baking cookies, watching films etc. We often drive round the local area to look at Christmas lights, and a couple of times we've been to little theatres in smaller towns where they do much cheaper pantomimes which are only £15 a ticket. (We wouldn't be able to afford the main theatre in the city).

Many moons ago my now adult DD decided to write to Father Christmas. This is what she wrote:
"Dear Santa, Please could you bring me a brown felt tip pen."
Santa duly obliged and she was thrilled.....

Xmas magic is free. You can make new traditions at any time.
You can do lots of low cost things throughout December.
Decorating the tree/house whilst listening to Xmas songs or watching a Xmas movie. Have hot chocolate and cheap cookies.
Get new PJ's and slippers if you can afford them one of the weekends to get cosy in and watch a Xmas film
Go for winter walks in the early evening to see local houses lit up.
At weekends if you have time just go for winter walks all wrapped up and then go home for hot chocolate and snuggle on the sofa under blankets.
Look out for free events at local libraries and local light switch ons.
Xmas neednt be expensive most of the happy memories are about time spent together rather than money spent.
My kids love a Xmas eve breakfast which is just a normal breakfast but with chocolate coins.
Then at bath time they get a new toothbrush, new PJ's and reindeer food to sprinkle on the lawn before bed. (Porridge oats) Nothing fancy. You don't need an all singing dancing Xmas eve box you don't even need to do as I do.
You can do Xmas on a tight budget and it still be amazing.

I stopped literally believing in Santa when I was 5. I still loved and got excited about Christmas! I think a lot of parents overthink this and obsess far too much about 'magic' when it's the simple things that lots of children remember.

I found driving around looking at lights boring and hated having to queue for ages to see 'Santa' in the shops. I have delightful memories of decorating the Christmas tree and putting up our Nativity scene, singing carols, making a Christingle, watching Christmas movies on TV together, the year it snowed and we played outside, visiting cousins on Boxing Day, a family joke about an annually regifted Smurf cassette... lots of things that don't cost a lot or require huge effort!

Don't put so much pressure on yourself. Your kids just want to spend time with you.

Bake
Make Christmas pictures on paper plates with tinsel and glitter
Have a picnic dinner on the floor with a Christmas movie and hot chocolate
Go for a walk and look at all the Christmas lights

My son ends up more excited about the above mentioned stuff than planned activities (he's 5.5)

I’ve just had a think back and here are my favourite Christmas childhood memories:

Making cards with my grandma.
Looking through my grandparents old decs and picking my favourite ones.
Taking part in my school Christmas play.
Baking and crafts with my great gran.
Going for walks around the village to see the lights.

I’ve also asked my (teen) kids, their most magical memories are:

The time we went for a forest walk through the Christmas trees.
Going shopping to a market/garden centre and choosing one new tree dec each every year, then looking back at the ones from previous years.
Christmas Crackers
Making extra fancy hot chocolate each Christmas Eve and looking for FC while drinking it.
Having family and friends over.

DS is 9- very much still believes. Also believes that I’m personal friends with the big man through work. 😂

The magic of Christmas really isn’t about extravagant days out for us. Our favourite festive things are:

• Christmas tree festival at the local church- a couple of quid donation, but it could be free
• Going to John Lewis to buy one special new bauble each year. I budget £10-15. That’s the only decoration I’ll buy most years. We do go for lunch after at our favourite chinese restaurant, (about £50), but that’s very much an optional extra.
• Going to the allotment/ woods to look for a special fallen branch to hang in the window (we paint it and turn it into a window display with dried oranges and twig stars and things) - usually spend a couple of quid on oranges!
• Christmas tree decorating - I do buy a small fresh potted tree every 2 years or so, and keep it alive for as long as I can- so about £40-50 every other year
• Going for a walk to see the Christmas lights around the village - free
• the Christmas tree switch on and carol singing at our village hall- free
• Ice Skating- this is £20, but i think it’s the only real “paid for” activity we do

I tend to spread these out over the advent weekends, so we always have one or two Christmassy things to do each weekend- but I reckon I spend maybe… £150?… on activities all month, including buying the Christmas tree.

At christmastime there is always só much to do that costs nothing or next-to-nothing! Especially for children as young as yours! Like christmas markets, choir singing, all the lights......just add lots of hot chocolate and gingerbreadmen 😋 But anyway, mine were 8 (the first one) and nearly 7 (my wise-ass second one) but they're still very much into the holidays 😊

Hrft. Am sorry you are having tough time financially but from personal recollection and current experience kids prefer time over money. Of course you may be struggling for time too but doing what you can to make quality parent time will win more parent points than spending money you don't need to.

We are restricted by time, money, and illness (all connected) but DC would rather be at home with sick parent than dancing round a fake snowman..

There are so many things you can do from baking to 25 day count down ‘treasure hunts’ around the house .. my son and I hardly had a penny and honesty we had the best times just making things up to do.

I didn't do any of that stuff as a child except go to the pantomime and I always thought Christmas was really magical. Even just seeing the town lights felt special at the time. Here they have free carols in the park and stuff like that.
You can make Christmas Eve special by following Santa's journey, laying food out for him and the reindeer etc, watching a nice Christmas movie and playing games.
I can't quite remember the exact age mine stopped believing but I do remember it was a gradual thing where they questioned the possibility of his existence but still anticipated his arrival! As a child I remember fully not believing, but still coming downstairs in the morning to see if the presents were there and it feeling truly magical.

We still believe. My son & I will still stuff ourselves with food, drink all day (he is 49) & watch telly. I feel desperately sorry that you feel so bad about Xmas - you shouldn't have to, it's about being together & having at least one day of having a big larf. Big hugs & know this - your kids will remember what you actually do, not what you wish you could do & that's almost always better x

Exactly. You don’t need to spend lots of money. The magic is in shared excitement and genuine family experiences ( not at Lapland).
We used to do little notes from Santa, in fancy writing with the edges singed ( pirate style) left in the fireplace or the garden.

We planned and then made treats for Santa and to give to relatives and neighbours on our special Christmas baking day!
Hand delivered our homemade Christmas cards to people.
Make Christmas presents for the birds- seed cakes etc to put outside.
Tour in the car of local house decorations/ lights.
Endless watching of films like bloody Nativity, Christmas Chronicles and Arthur Christmas.
Local farmers tractor runs are always good. Village church nativity service is lovely.
Make paper chains and other decorations at home. Also made compulsory Christmas hats to be worn on the day .
Make your own traditions, this is the magic !

Can I just say Christmas was magical to me as a child. I didn’t do anything, didn’t even go see Father Christmas. My mum hated me and was a terrible person, but it was magical because I’d spend it with my Nana. She was everything to me. She made it amazing for me just by being the wonderful woman she was. I cry every Christmas because I’d give anything to spend one more day with her. I’m crying now typing this. Point is Christmas doesn’t need to be all about getting/doing stuff. It’s about the people you spend it with.

Mine are 15 and 18 and as far as I know, they still believe 🤣.

I have wonderful memories of my childhood Christmases but no-one ever did anything that cost money in those days apart from a department store Father Christmas.

Just reiterating others' posts, but go for a walk and look at everyone’s lights, hot chocolate and marshmallows when you get back. A Christingle service on Christmas Eve, a local carol service, track Santa on Norad, make decorations and Christmas biscuits. Make a gingerbread house, or a chocolate house. Make your own crackers and choose some pound shop gifts to fit in them. And leave a mince pie and Brussels sprouts out on Xmas Eve.

Honestly, so much you can do that barely costs anything. Enjoy!

The memories are really not about money. Making cookies together before a film, going on walks to see Christmas signs, playing games with the grandparents-that's what they really remember. Look at the decorations ordinary people had in the past (the super rich probably always had fancier), and the children were just as enthralled.

Firstly, you can have a lovely Christmas without all those paid activities - most didn’t even exist when my dc were 6. Instead look for details of houses that are decorated, make hot chocolate and drive around looking at them. Take them to a Christingle service at your local church (usually mid December) or the crib service (tea time on Christmas Eve) whilst they appreciate a modest donation, if you can’t afford it you don’t have to pay anything. Look at see what free activities are in your community, switch ons, singing around the Christmas tree, activities in local halls.

You have been sucked into consumerism if you believe the only way to make Christmas magic is by attending these big organised events. Kids enjoy the small things, putting up the tree, Christmas films, decorations, baking, looking at lights, garden centres, they don't need these big days out to be happy.