DD and Friend hurt me yet I’m in the wrong?

Gosh I really thought this was going to be something else altogether - like you were actually hurt in a prank or something. What a lot of nothing. I have a 13 year old and I can’t imagine a scenario where I’d show up in her room crying - much less if she had a friend round! Genuinely can’t picture it. Even if I was scared / annoyed / had tragic news / something else I can’t think of - no excuse to follow her to cry at her.

I am worried for you if this reaction is in any way typical for you. Are you okay? Is there something else going on?

They’re a similar price.

I honestly forget people like this exist until I come to MN. It's mind boggling. The absolute inability to navigate perfectly normal scenarios without having a nervous breakdown baffles me; I often wonder how they'd manage if something bad actually happened to them.

Makes for a good laugh though. It's just unfortunate that in this case, it'll be at OP's daughter's expense. That's a story everyone in her year will spread like wildfire, by the end of term it'll have evolved to 4 police cars turning up and OP running down the street in terror.

Her daughter will remember it for a very long time. Nice one, OP.

When we had mice and dh was working away my then 12 year old put a plastic rat in my bed.
Made me jump as I hate rats and mice but I saw the funny side after the initial shock.

If there were two of them and both little girls, they could have done something much worse inspired by The Shining.

It was a stupid prank but they're children. Let them know you don't appreciate it (pranks are shit) but you have to let it go.

I'm assuming either you have bad anxiety, are being threatened by someone or know someone who was murdered horribly. If not then this was a big overreaction. I think it would've been fine to cry if they had done something truly terrible (faked an accident, being dead etc.) but for a small prank I don't think crying is reasonable

This is a weird reaction..surely if someone had broken into your house they would be looking for valuables to steal, not writing messages on the mirror.
Is there something particularly triggering about this or would make you think it was a stranger rather than the kids pranking you?

And was it a Chanel lipstick, or just MAC?

Why would that make you cry exactly? Massive overreaction. I would have been pissed at it being lipstick because it’s a nightmare to clean off glass but I would have just made them clean it. Crying is really odd behaviour and your DH is right, her friend is going to think you’re weird.

Get over it. I hate horror movies and don't watch them.

My daughter loves them and tries to scare me at times. I don't go off crying about it. I do tell her "I don't appreciate it" and she apologises and moves on. Very chill.

You are the parent, you need to be able to emotionally regulate over this stuff. It was a harmless prank which you turned into a dramatic scene, in front of her friend who may or may not tell another person which in turn will tell another person which in turn will get back to your DD.

Holy God, that sounds like one hell of a post!

You sound a bit pathetic and embarrassing OP. Can you not see how YOU would have been embarrassed if your own mother acted as you have.

Really? You can’t imagine having a friend over for a sleep over at 12, writing murder on the mirror for a laugh, and your mum bursting into thr room sobbing and terrified?

because I can. The horror is that,

Are you the same poster who was on here a few weeks ago calling your 12 year old dd heartless?

Because she rolled her eyes at the door when you tripped over, and had two grown men half carry you home while weeping dramatically. When you didn't actually require any medical attention at all.

Because I'm getting those vibes from this post.

I think some of you are overreacting on behalf of the daughter and her friend.

But surely you realised your mistake before sobbing at dd and her friend and could have calmed down before acting?

I always think the husband was right to not back the op up. Thay would have compounded the issue. I do not beleive if a parent does something wrong, ridiculous, ott, whatever the other parent has to smack a smile on and tell the child they are wrong and the poorly behaved parent right. Where does that even end.

How do you cope in every day life, OP? If REDRUM written on a mirror scares you, how do you manage to navigate the Halloween section of shops? Do you walk with your head down past gardens with skeletons in them? Sit with your eyes closed during the trailers in the cinema, just in case? Never a look at a billboard, Heavens!

Your daughter will now be the laughing stock of her school if her friend goes back and shares. Which she will, because she is 12 and her friends mum did something fucking bizarre.

I'd suggest therapy. If this is even real.

How has a horror film been forced on you? You saw some lipstick on a mirror and didn't understand the reference. How do you cope at Halloween?

Crying was a massive overreaction...but to then confront your daughter and her friend while still crying is absolutely ridiculous behavior.

Your husband is right, the friend will absolutely spread this around school and I wouldn't be surprised if her parents end up doing the same.

What did you expect?

Yep. It's awful. Sorry you had it too.

My mum used to cry and guilt me. It sucks.

Can't believe what I've just read 😅

oh catch yourself on, you CANNOT be serious that you cried at this. Toughen up

I don’t like pranks at all. I don’t find them funny and I think they are purely designed to humiliate the person(s) being pranked.

I think your DH should have had your back in front of your DD and her friend in so far as telling them that pranks, even ones they consider harmless, are not nice and then making sure they cleaned the mirror thoroughly. He should also have been telling your DD that if the bullet of your lipstick has been ruined or a lot of it used for writing the message, then the cost of a replacement will be taken out of any pocket money until it’s paid back.

That said, I do think your reaction was miles over the top and your DH would have been perfectly entitled to pull you up on your overreaction privately. Hopefully something like this won’t happen again and there won’t be any further repercussions for your daughter with her friends/school mates and you can use this incident as a way to build your emotional resilience moving forward.