Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU not to want to cook Xmas dinner for 12 people

60 replies

Pollypickme · 27/11/2025 18:54

I invited my in-laws for Xmas dinner and they said yes but almost immediately said that my BIL, wife and child would probably spend Xmas at theirs so would it be ok to invite them. I hesitantly said yes as they are vegan. They’re nice enough but I have zero in common with them and they tend to overstay for hours when invited over.
this week my MIL has asked if my husbands sister, partner and child can also come? She’s not particularly nice to me and not someone I would ever spend time with if I wasn’t related via marriage. I haven’t said yes but I kind of feel obligated. Please help! AIBU not to want to

OP posts:
Silverbirchleaf · 27/11/2025 19:19

Can you use kackmjf space, turkey already ordered (so won’t have enough) etc as an excuse, or as CV others have said, invite them further Boxing Day.

very cheeky of mil to invite then to your house.

StewkeyBlue · 27/11/2025 19:07

Turning an invite for 2 into an invite for 8 is serious cheeky fucker territory. If she has had the front to ask, you are allowed to have the front to say ‘too much’.

StewkeyBlue · 27/11/2025 19:03

I would say that cooking 2 different meals for 12 is beyond your capacity and would it work for them all to come over for drinks and mince pies in the evening or afternoon instead.

Don’t just keep saying yes.

MrsLizzieDarcy · 27/11/2025 19:03

Be honest and say it's a bit overwhelming to have that many to cook for and you'd only really imagined it being them 2.

Backtrack as fast as you can, and never ask again!

Zempy · 27/11/2025 19:01

No. Suggest you all go to a restaurant, although you may have left it rather late!

BillieWiper · 27/11/2025 19:00

Just say you haven't the space for that many at the table. Suggest they come round for drinks and a snack later on in the evening, or you go out to eat?

I can't blame you for not wanting lots of people and it's out of order she just invited all of them pretty much to your house.

Tell your husband to tell her if you don't want to. It's his mum so should be him stopping her inconveniencing you.

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 27/11/2025 18:58

I'd just say, actually how about you guys just do your meal and pop round for drinks and nibbles later on

Geepee71 · 27/11/2025 18:57

That would be a no from me.
Can you suggest going to a restaurant instead, appreciate they are ridiculously expensive, but can cover all dietary needs and you can leave when you are done, with no lingering guests
Where do the in-laws usually spend Xmas

Geepee71 · 27/11/2025 18:57

That would be a no from me.
Can you suggest going to a restaurant instead, appreciate they are ridiculously expensive, but can cover all dietary needs and you can leave when you are done, with no lingering guests
Where do the in-laws usually spend Xmas

EsmeSusanOgg · 27/11/2025 18:55

Suggest that they come over after lunch for a couple of hours evening/ afternoon tops.