To be struggling on 3k per month?

It depends if your planning on watching live tv. I’ve just cancelled ours and I’m planning on buying a Roku stick which is £20. We already have this in another room, and is great for accessing Netflix etc for a one off cost.

In whose name is the contract? Have you spoken to them?

Hair? Nails? Make up? Clothes? Takeaway coffee? Buying lunch at work?

small things but jeez they add up quick!

£1500 in the ‘?’ category each month is a lot.

Export your bank account transactions (and credit card if you use one) into a spreadsheet for the last three months and work out wtf it’s going. You say 150 for food, but maybe it’s a lot more if you’re ordering takeaways etc.

I found I was slinking a lot on Amazon (so easy, don’t even have to change out if PJs) so I have an Amazon embargo now.

From January put money aside each money for Christmas - totally takes the stress out. I do it for other annual costs too like insurance, boiler service etc.

get rid of sky, even if they charge you for the equipment - you will save in the long run.

Mobile bill is high - you can get 3 giffgaff SIMs for a tenner each.

Water is v high too - I’m same as you (sp with two kids) and ours has just gone up to £30 a month.

the priority though is to work out where that £1500 is going.

What you really need to do is go through your bank statements and see exactly where the money is going.

ignore your parents, a lot of them still think in the days a pint of milk cost 10p

Do you pay for school lunches? I’m forever topping up my dcs lunch accounts. Do you pay for school transport? Clubs? What about the constant requests for money from schools, have you added up how much you pay here?

School uniforms
general clothes
shoes and trainers
activities with the kids - all these cost money too.

Start out by listing all your direct debits. I have loads more than you have listed. What about the following:

Life and critical illness cover
Building and contents insurance
Broadband
Pet insurance
Car tax
TV licence

Do you pay anything for your kids? After school clubs, activities, pocket money.

You make no allowances for clothes, dentist, opticians, gifts, vets, holidays, days out, socialising, etc

Do you ever eat out, socialise? Do you buy books, music, toys? Do you go on holiday, to the cinema, days out? Opticians? Do you buy prescriptions?

When you factor in some of these things that are ad hoc spends, you start to see where your money is going.

Keep a log for a whole month of all your direct debits and then everything you spend in addition. It can be quite eye opening.

Your water is high and I would look at getting a meter. Food also seems high but it depends on the age of your kids. Sky and phone are also things to look at. I have just ordered an iphone 17 and will be paying £30 for that and £10 for my sons contract (he is getting my old iphone 14 for Christmas).

you don’t need Sky, it’s very expensive so you could cancel that. Replace with Netflix.
your water bill is high, phone bill is high, food bill is high.

I am a single mum and earn less than you do. My bills are also a little higher and I live in an expensive part of the country.

Change all of your direct debits and bills to leave your account on the 1st of the month. Open yourself a second bank account and move the remainder of your monthly money into the second account on the 2nd of the month. Calculate from how much is left, how much you should be spending per week. Every Sunday (or which ever day suits you) evening, move the next weeks money so you are essentially giving yourself an allowance. Once your money for the week is gone, its gone - this way it will last you.

No it's because there's only one person earning.

Singles earning a high amount are unfairly taxed. Compared to household incomes.

2 people earning the same amount would get way more benefits. And op may even be getting some of her child benefit reduced because of her income.

Their rent would be double her mortgage though and depends where you live as to whether you’d be able to get a big enough rental property for that - definitely not where I am. But I agree that is really unfair and messed up. But she should be fine on 3k with a mortgage of 500 something a month.

Your car insurance seems high- look at some price comparison sites and put a date in you diary to switch.
Sky is very expensive could you cancel and move to freesat and netflix?
If your phone is on contract when does that end- or when is the hanset paid off? Can you sell some things to get cash for Christmas?

Does an adult cost an extra £1k a month?

She is taking responsibility!

She's working hard, earning and taking care of her kids on her own.

Cut her some slack.

I have just done a benefits calculator.

2 adults both earning £20,000 a month (£1.5k after tax PCM)
2 Children age 8 and 6 (both girls)
Rent £1000pcm

They would receive their £3k a month in wages, plus £1109.53PCM inc Child Benefit.

£1000 more than this lady who has all of that responsibility alone.

No she doesn’t need to get rid of her cat! She doesn’t need to be “counting the pennies” given that she earns a comfortable amount and has low housing costs. Pets aren’t disposable and cutbacks can be made in others areas, as you’ve outlined.

Really? I've never earned anything like that.

Please have a look at YNAB, it has been life changing for us. You plan for everything so nothing takes you by surprise and you account for everything you spend so you know where all your money is going.

www.ynab.com

Are you getting the single person council tax discount? That seems a bit high unless you have a large house

Sky, cat and phone can be got rid of (or once out of contract). £60 on a phone is madness, we pay £8 a month I have 70gb of data that rolls over and unlimited calls, my bill is never over £8. We buy our phones outright and keep them on average 4/5 years, we wait until the new model comes out and the price drops massively for the "old" model, my friend has always bought decent phones second hand but I'm very aware they'd likely be stolen.

You don't need sky, if it's your broadband too you can get internet way cheaper, unless you need fast internet to wfh? Tv package can go though.

Then there's the cat, as sad as it is you can't afford to keep it, £50 is a lot when you are counting the pennies.

You've just saved £150 making small changes that won't impact your quality of life.

Because there’d be an extra person to support.

Is this rage bait? Why don’t you know where your money is going?

That can’t be all your outgoings either, they are the headlines but what about:

home insurance
car tax (may not be applicable granted)
tv license
childcare (again may be n/a)
car repairs/maintenance
kids clubs/hobbies
school lunches (if applicable)
kids clothes

You can definitely get your food bill down, £150 a week is a lot, we’re a family of 4 and average £120 a week including a couple of bottles of wine.

I’m not saying it’s not tough but you need to take a bit of responsibility!