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Original poster

To not want to stay at this family members house again bevmcause she doesn't change the sheets between guests?

183 replies

Bulbsbulbsbulbs · 26/11/2025 17:11

I've just been to stay for 4 nights and was told that sheets aren't changed between guests. Told "'it was only X who stayed in them and she's family so I don't see the problem". I said I wasn't comfortable with it and was laughed at and told I was being snobbish/ precious. It wasn't in a nasty way but clearly whatever I say the sheets won't get changed as "they aren't dirty".

Then I was told not to strip the bed because Y is coming to stay next week then Z is coming for Christmas.

I honestly find it pretty revolting and don't want to stay again. My husband says it's fine, he's not bothered, but I know it's just because he doesn't want to cause offence . I really would rather pay to stay in a hotel.

So am I being precious?

OP posts:
Theextraordinaryisintheordinary · 27/11/2025 05:00

It’s exhausting when you have guests for one night but it still has to be done. Although, if my mum has stayed one night I just change the pillow case for myself & jump in.

Darkchocokatetorte · 27/11/2025 04:59

I take my own pillow cases everywhere as I change my face one every night (my DC have this habit too now). I also take my own bedding and sheets because I stay in a lot of Airbnb’s and sometimes the bedding is so cheap and nasty I need to use my own. If it’s cotton and clean I’ll is theirs.

Your relative is gross.

Blizzardofleaves · 27/11/2025 04:55

I could not bear this, no.
Stay in a hotel. You will be much more comfortable there.
Your dh has zero backbone! My dh would never ever ask me to sleep in dirty bed linen to keep the peace.

CuddlyPug · 27/11/2025 04:54

Scabies is the gift that keeps on giving. Nits could be a possibility too. Bedbugs too. I do not consider myself to have over high housekeeping standards but not changing the sheets is - well I know what my mother would say but in these woke times I couldn't possibly describe them as dirty, lazy, and slatternly.

cityanalyst678 · 27/11/2025 04:35

My first thought was crikey, why would you dump yourself on someone for 4 nights? Maybe she is trying to put you off….

FreddysFingers · 27/11/2025 04:28

God no, you're definitely not being precious! Clean sheets at someone else's house is standard as far as I'm concerned, I don't care if they're not matching or whatever, but to not change them after each guest is pretty grim.

OneMoreProfiterole · 27/11/2025 04:23

Potential bedbugs, scabies, ringworm… nice!
If you know Y and Z you need to tell them.

Lastfroginthebox · 27/11/2025 04:11

That's dreadful. If I have guests, I always use clean bedding and I always expect clean bedding when I stay elsewhere, even if it's just one night. In DP's family, they take their own duvet and cover with them when they visit each other to save on excessive washing.

user1492757084 · 27/11/2025 03:47

Not good news to hear, Op.
Fresh sheets are manditory for guests.
Unless it is the same guest who tells me they are due to stay another night soon after they leave, I strip the bed.

I take my own sheets sometimes to save family from washing sheets if they have a busy life.

LoudSnoringDog · 27/11/2025 03:45

This is so grim.

DreamTheMoors · 27/11/2025 03:31

ICK!!!

Flomingho · 27/11/2025 03:23

You are not being precious at all. That is truly disgusting and a lack of basic hygiene. Hotel all the way if was you. If someone thinks this is acceptable what else are they cutting corners on. I wouldn't feel comfortable staying there. 🤮

WishingIwasyoungerandslimmer · 27/11/2025 02:57

RedRoss86 · 27/11/2025 02:15

While I feel sorry for you OP, I feel even worse for ‘Z’ who will be 4th in the unwashed bed linen line!

😫

RedRoss86 · 27/11/2025 02:15

While I feel sorry for you OP, I feel even worse for ‘Z’ who will be 4th in the unwashed bed linen line!

FullOfMomsense · 27/11/2025 01:50

I'm not much of a germophobe but even I would refuse to sleep in that bed. How awful, are they good hosts otherwise? So weird, so gross.

shhblackbag · 27/11/2025 01:44

Nope. I would not be staying there again. Gross.

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 27/11/2025 01:35

Take your own sheets, problem solved.

Lostsadandconfused · 27/11/2025 01:33

The only exception I make is for my mother and sister. I’ve shared a bed with them (not at the same time) on more than one occasion. And they sleep on the other side of the bed, so my side has not been slept on.

If I visit my mother after I know my sister has recently stayed the night, I would not insist that the sheets be changed.

This ‘rule’ is void of course if either of our parters have stayed.

I change my own spare bed sheets after every visit as my guests are not frequent and I don’t like leaving dirty sheets on the bed.

ilovepixie · 27/11/2025 01:30

And how many people have ‘turned it over’? 🤮🤮

CheeseIsMyIdol · 27/11/2025 01:27

Dliplop · 26/11/2025 17:50

My mum’s house is the only house I’d be okay with it and she tells us who’s been where and offers to change it
”niece had a nap last week, are you okay with it” “baby niece had a sleepover for 2 nights, do you want it changed for your kid?” And the reason she foes it is because it’s usually the same people sleeping or napping in the same beds, but sometimes we or my brother’s family mess up the system. And she does change them if it’s been a while or there’s been several uses.

eeeewww

CheeseIsMyIdol · 27/11/2025 01:25

Ghht · 27/11/2025 01:19

I’m lazy with bedding and even I would ensure that guests always have fresh sheets that are washed after each person.

The only time I wouldn’t after one use is if used between my mum and sister staying because they wouldn’t mind if either had slept in the bed before. That’s the only exception though.

Whether or not “they” would “mind,” some of us have rock bottom standards for the hospitality we offer.

CheeseIsMyIdol · 27/11/2025 01:23

Absolutely disgusting. I would not darken their doors again, and I’d be taking a good hard look at “D”H.

Ghht · 27/11/2025 01:19

I’m lazy with bedding and even I would ensure that guests always have fresh sheets that are washed after each person.

The only time I wouldn’t after one use is if used between my mum and sister staying because they wouldn’t mind if either had slept in the bed before. That’s the only exception though.

MoonWoman69 · 27/11/2025 01:13

I can't even imagine someone saying "so and so napped in the bed last week, is that ok?"
No, it's not ok! Fresh bedding before and after someone stays!
When I stay at over my friends, she always makes up the bed in my room fresh. When I get up on the last day, I strip it off to help her out, as I know she'll do that when I've left anyway! Some people are just grim! 🤢

AmateurDad · 26/11/2025 23:50

Sleeposaurus · 26/11/2025 17:13

Nope. Totally grim. Who wants to sleep on a pillow someone else has dribbled on.

Turn it over? Then problem goes away