To not want to stay at this family members house again bevmcause she doesn't change the sheets between guests?

i had guests leave about 2 weeks ago. I stripped the bed.. but threw the duvet on it with the naked pillows.. will leave it that way until the next guest are due in January.. where I will wash the duvet, and make the bed the day before they arrive.

A friend did that to me, the sheets stunk and the mattress was shocking should have been in the bin not on a bed. Will never stay there again.

That's horrific Op, utterly vile and horrific. I am flabbergasted that people have such low standards especially when hosting guests. Please don't stay in that house again.

Thats 🤢 , I wouldn’t stay either

Just don't stay there. End od of story.

You are not being precious and that mucky mare is a terrible host. If I were you and had to stay there again I'd take my own bed linen, strip the bed of hers and remake it with mine to sleep in whilst staying, but when I stripped the bed again at the end of my stay I wouldn't remake it with her linen - that should drive the message home! 😉

Gosh , no chance. Perhaps you can offer to bring your own.

I'd sleep in a bed my sister or mum had slept in for one night prior and vice versa but noone else and in my own house it's always clean sheets for any other guests but the 3 of us just aren't bothered for one offs.

Same! But it's always clean between guests even if only 1 night

Oh God, no! 😱

I am really precious about my bedding, even at home, and always have been. It has to “smell right” ie; clean, of either washing gel or of “outside line drying”

I change my pillowcases every day, as I dribble in my sleep. The whole bed is changed twice a week. I could not bear to go anywhere near (a strangers) an unclean bed, and I think it’s downright lazy to expect guests to sleep in other peoples bedding. Totally yuck🤮

We all shed hairs, skin, sweat, dribble and God knows what else in our sleep. To expect people to sleep in other peoples detritus is vile.

Id be straight back out the door, never to return!

Eeewww I couldn't do that ... that's just lazy your not being precious at all .
No wonder you don't want to stay again .

I would never stay there again. That is revolting.

My auntie uses the phrase ‘relatively clean’. If I slept in a bed for one night only and my sister/close relative slept in it after, I wouldn’t expect it to be fully changed - pillowcases yes, sheet and duvet not so fussed. Anything over a night, yes. Only for close family. I think this approach is sensible and fair, and I’ve adopted it too. But I understand others may go ‘yuck’.

Take some chocolate with you next time and go up to your room on your own and then using the chocolate make a skid mark in an appropriate place where your husband will sleep and which will be visible to him when he pulls back the covers to get in.

Keep quiet and enjoy the evening until bedtime and then when your husband shows you, scream loudly and demand Slack Alice comes into your room and changes the bed sheets!

No. That's really grim.

I ask guests not to strip the bed because I change the bedding the day I'm expecting guests, so it's clean and fresh for them, I was kind of expecting that sort of thing. But no, your relative is dirty and lazy.

Uurrrgggghhhh.

I had a friend whose Mum always took her own bedding when staying anywhere even with her own daughter. I can see why. Yuk.

No that's grim OP YANBU. I wouldn't say I have particularly high standards, I am frequently baffled by the cleaning threads where people are cleaning toilets every day etc, but you should always change sheets between guests. Dead skin cells and all that.

I have to admit my standards are not that high. I change my bedding about once every 2 weeks. But if my son comes home to visit for a weekend I will l always make sure the bedding is fresh for him. I sometimes sleep in his room when he isn’t there as my house is overcrowded. But when he comes to visit it is clean and fresh. I don’t think the bedding smells or anything anyway but people don’t know when they smell so how can I know that. I would rather it was fresh and clean for him.

So I think if you have a visitor and they stay for a night/ couple of nights and then they are coming back a week or so later it’s fine to leave the same bedding on. If it’s a different visitor it needs changing.

That’s plumb revolting. I wouldn’t dream of leaving the same sheets on - irritating sometimes for the one-night visitor, but everyone gets clean sheets. How could anyone think otherwise?

Apart from mutual crashing at each other's flats in our 20s everyone I know puts clean sheets on. I'm no germophobe but having someone else's particles from months before isn't appealing! Xx

Oh yuck, that’s disgusting. No, YANBU op. I wouldn’t stay again, I’d book a hotel.

YANBU.

I wash the pillow cases/sheets and duvet cover even if a guest has stayed one night.

I've also got mattress/pillow protectors on the beds and was these too.

Eeeewwww…That is disgusting.

Take your own sheets