Why don't people take their kids on holiday?

But no one is suggesting you need to show your children the entire world. The friends the OP is talking about say they ‘wouldn’t know where to go’ and they ‘don’t know how airports work’. I think that, assuming you can afford it, even a weekend or two in a couple of European cities shows a child where nothing else will, the existence of different peoples with different cultures and histories, speaking other languages, functioning slightly differently, with different landscapes and different climates etc. And that modelling how to use an airport and a foreign public transport system and making yourself understood overseas are really valuable.

Total sympathy as I am appallingly motion sick a lot. However, flights don’t usually bother me as much, so hopefully your children will be similar. I’m still seasick, but I grew out of the worst of my carsickness by adulthood.

You can't literally show your children the whole world and every type of experience that exists though.
It's physically impossible.
I have never taken my 17 year old daughter abroad (which is what the OP seemed to be talking about rather than having a UK based holiday) but she has had plenty of experiences in her life.
Not all I necessarily enjoyed (The Science Museum in London several times....soooo boring) but she isn't deprived in any way because I haven't taken her abroad.
I was also not deprived in any way as a child because my parents didn't take me abroad. I have some amazing memories of the UK based holidays and daytrips that they took me on.
I probably had more days out than actual holidays and they were fantastic days out.

To be honest, I think part of parenting is showing your children different places, if you have the means to obviously. (I absolutely appreciate that people have sound environmental reasons for not flying, but in that case, ferries, trains etc are an option.)

I’m not saying that parents with no interest in travel should be buzzing off on holiday all the time for the sake of their children, but I think they should do it occasionally, to model that travel is possible. Just as I think that Mners with no interest in making friends should model friendships for their children for the sake of demonstrating what’s possible.

You shouldn’t restrict your children’s lives because if your own limitations or incuriosity.

We havent taken the kids abroad because they cant manage a 5 minute car/bus/boat journey (nor can my dh) without puking. Dh has the same response on airplanes. He's still happy to go, with meds that help a lot. The travel sickness meds (and other aids) are much less effective on ds6 (though he would puke for the duration and bear it), and dd3 isnt old enough to try them yet - plus she's noise sensitive to droning sounds like hoovers, mowers, drilling, any monotonous noise, full on sobbing, shaking levels, even with ear defenders. I dont think plane engine noise would work for her yet.

We will do a short flight somewhere when dd is a little older, to see how she manages it. I've travelled extensively through Europe, Asia and a little of North America for work, so it's not a fear of the unknown, more what my kids can handle. Plus we're not gifted with luck - we took the kids for a mini break in London a couple of years ago (they manage trains much better) and ds got heat stroke and wiped out 2 days.

I cant wait to show them the world, when they're both ready :)

@Micnerhss what part of "people have different interests" do you not understand.
Some people enjoy "travel".
Some people don't.
"Best experience" 😂😂
It's only best if you think it's best. But not everyone thinks the same.

In primary “they’re pretty much friends with everyone”

no they aren’t… with all 29?

We did parties just with their friends, bit really pushed the boat out and no doubt spent less than one of the 30 plus kids hall parties

You sound so full of joy!

I can understand dodging planes from an environmental angle but they could always get to France on the train or ferry…

I’m not sure OP in short. We couldn’t afford holidays abroad for years but we’d always go down to south Wales which I love. It’s genuinely one of my favourite places on earth still.

Travel isn't the only way to be curious. It blows my mind how so many people think those who don't travel must be lacking/missing out. And I say this as someone who has travelled a fair bit.

I don't think my friend from school who has never travelled is less curious than me. She's curious about different things in a different way. She's chosen to spend her time expanded her curiosity about how the mind works into a rewarding career in mental health. When I look at what she does, I rather think I'm the one lacking.

I had the same thought. I’ve literally never known anyone with kids who hasn’t gone on holiday if they can afford to do so.

It seems very unusual that you know lots of these people. Are they the type who’s family all live in the same couple of streets and have done for generations, who all work for the same local firm, and who even view the neighbouring town as exotic and foreign?

It certainly is. And at least the seagulls don't nick your doughnut in Spain...

I haven,t been abroad in 17 years. Can't afford them. I find them a bit of a bother to be honest.

Yes, I got your POV already. We’ll have to agree to disagree. I completely reject the idea that trips of the week-in-the-sun in Spain/Greece variety do not confer benefits over and above a day trip to the seaside local to one’s hometown. But it’s okay to have a different opinion.

Some people are just uncurious. And they pass that lack of curiosity onto their children. It blows my mind. The world is an amazing place and life is short. As for the excuse of ‘delays at the airport’ and ‘jet lag’ - really? You’d let that put you off exploring this fantasticly diverse world we live in?

Not all non verbal ASD is the same. Just because your son can manage, or you can, doesn't mean someone else's child can, or the parent can face the prospect.

No, you don't have to go overseas to travel, I do agree. But I don't agree that simply 'going abroad' is enriching in and of itself, nor even travelling within the UK if what you DO is something you could do in your home town if you had the weather.

I live in a seaside town. Heard on the bus a young girl on holiday with her grandparents complaining because they had said they were going to the pub when they got off the bus. Little girl said, 'but we have been to three pubs already today.'. Now, what do you think they'd be doing in their home town? What do you imagine they'd do abroad?

Travel's only enriching if you also get out of your own headspace, and some people don't. They do the same thing they do at home, just without work getting in the way.

And, like I said, nothing wrong with it, I just think there's some people who could travel the world and still be living narrow lives. I've met a few people like that. I'm related to a few people like that.

It's frankly why there's so many resorts that re-create British pubs, offer English Breakfast, ex pats running fish and chip shops doing a roaring trade...people want what they have at home. They want to do what they do at home. They just want to do it in nice weather.

That's cherry picking though. Lots of people who choose not to travel AREN'T disadvantaged. They could afford it if they wanted to, but choose not to bother. That's fine for the adults, but very unfair on the children. Those who genuinely can't afford it (or have other genuine reasons not to) are different.

I agree. It's getting the message across to the children that there's a big world out there and gets them thinking about their future life away from their home towns. As you say, even a day trip to go to something like a national park is enriching, if only to show what's outside their locality. Seeing things outside their hometown will encourage them to seriously consider going to uni in a different city, relocating for work opportunities, etc.

It's very life-limiting for the kids if their parents don't leave the home town often as they may well likewise get stuck in a rut and not venture away either. Even a package holiday to a med resort will give the kids some valuable life experience even if they never leave the hotel! Even if it's just negotiating airports, seeing vehicles on the "wrong" side of the road, notices and signs in a different language etc.

Me and my sister are polar opposites. I've been to dozens of different countries, lived and worked in various different places in the UK, but sister has literally never left the country, only had a couple of UK holidays (in the same region), always worked in her hometown, etc. Her kids are likewise - both working in the same now run down town in minimum wage jobs, never gone abroad, etc - really blinkered views as to hotels and foreign travel. Our son left home to go to uni, then his first graduate job was the other side of the country, and now he's moved again to the opposite end of the country, been on holiday several times with friends whilst at uni and with friends from work, planning 2 or 3 holidays next year with various different friends from different places etc.

It's not just accommodation and meals though. Many have entertainment for the kids, i.e. kid's clubs, activities, even small water parks, and then there is the "free" snacks and soft drinks and ice cream all day. Some of the people I knew who went AI literally never left the hotel and never paid a penny for anything, so no taxis/buses either. If you have a few kids, the pricing works out very favourably compared to going out every day to water park, beach, restaurants, etc plus the bus/taxi fares etc.

and I think this is what some people struggle to understand about money.

The OP has said her friends "could afford it", but having the cash in the bank doesn't mean they have to spend it on the same things as the OP, as they don't put the same value on a holiday abroad as the OP does.
There's 101 things different people might spend the same money on even, in the unlikely event all of her friends' families' budgets were identical.

We’ll have to agree to disagree. I believe even the week-in-Spain trips are enriching and confer intangible benefits in life.

Also - and this is not specifically in response to you but to others on the thread - travel in the UK is of course still travel! A hiking trip in Lake District, a week in Cornwall or a city break in Edinburgh or Bath are fab experiences. You don’t need to hop on a plane or cross the channel for enriching travel experiences.