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Original poster

I’m coming to terms with the fact I’m really very ugly

383 replies

AutumnLeavesandKnittedJumpers · 25/11/2025 22:00

And I don’t know what I can do about it

I have very fine hair. It’s like baby hair. It’s nothing health wise (I’m not losing it), there’s a lot of hair on my head but each strand is just so fine. I can’t style it or do anything with it. I have to get extensions to feel comfortable wearing it down. I take all the supplements and use all the serums but it doesn’t change a thing.

My teeth are crooked but I can’t afford braces. I didn’t qualify for braces on the NHS as a child and my parents wouldn’t pay for them because they thought my teeth “added character”. Now whenever I smile it looks like I’m missing a tooth at the front. I don’t smile with my mouth open because it just looks awful.

im fat, I’ve lost nearly 150 from my heaviest but I’m still a size 16-18. Nothing looks good on me and I want to hide my body all the time. I look the exact same as I did 150lbs ago.

I could do with a nose job, my nose is crooked and big, but I can’t afford it.

sometimes I just feel like giving up, I’m 26, I’ve never had a romantic relationship because nobody has ever found me attractive. I’ve tried all the dating apps but whenever I suggest meeting up with a guy he turns round and says no because he’s not feeling it. I try to meet people in person but nobody is even interested in talking to me.

it just feels like it’s been such a long time on my own already, the thought of doing another 50 years on my own just fills me with dread. I just want to cry when I think of my future because I feel like I’ll never meet anyone because I’m just genuinely ugly.

OP posts:
PrizedPickledPopcorn · 25/11/2025 22:13

Another blunt person here. A romantic companion isn’t going to fix this. It will just add something else to worry about.

Concentrate on making your life as good as it can be, stop trying to get people to find you attractive or like you. Focus on doing things that you like.

Enjoy baking? Make more cakes there will be baby groups, charities, food banks, loads of places that would appreciate a regular donation of cake!

Stop worrying about ways your life doesn’t measure up to what society has lined up. Plan how to get what you want. Focus on achieving goals that impress you.
That’s an impressive weight loss, and there will be loads of things you can do now, that were harder before. Do some of them.

Join clubs, learn skills, get out there and live life on your terms, doing things that make you happy. I wish someone had told me that when I was young!

Original poster
AutumnLeavesandKnittedJumpers · 25/11/2025 22:10

Wickedlittledancer · 25/11/2025 22:08

Wow well done on the 150 lbs weight loss, that’s a massive achievement, and I can guarantee you do not look the same, not even remotely.

you seem to be focusing on the negatives, and lack confidence, plus just generally very down, so you need to try to find things you enjoy, don’t think about blokes, but what would you like to do to have fun?

I bake, I go for hikes, I watch sports. All well and good but let’s be real, I can’t do that alone for the next fifty years

OP posts:
Original poster
AutumnLeavesandKnittedJumpers · 25/11/2025 22:10

LVhandbagsatdawn · 25/11/2025 22:07

I'm going to be blunt:

Your hair sounds absolutely fine. Who cares if it's not styled? I never style my hair.

You've done brilliantly to lose 150lb. If you want to lose more then by all means keep going, but if you really think you look "exactly the same" after losing nearly 11 stone then you need therapy, not a diet.

Given your analysis of how you look even after that incredible weight loss, I would bet the farm that there's nothing seriously wrong with your nose or your teeth.

Its quite clear the issue is rock bottom self confidence and self esteem. That is what will be putting people off.

I would seriously advise getting yourself into therapy rather than trying to save up for a nose job that I highly doubt you need.

I care, my hair doesn’t even hold a curl. It’s just really disgusting. It’s genuinely like baby hair. My three year old niece has the same hair as I do. It doesn’t look put together, I can’t even tie it up because it just looks pathetic

OP posts:
Wickedlittledancer · 25/11/2025 22:08

Wow well done on the 150 lbs weight loss, that’s a massive achievement, and I can guarantee you do not look the same, not even remotely.

you seem to be focusing on the negatives, and lack confidence, plus just generally very down, so you need to try to find things you enjoy, don’t think about blokes, but what would you like to do to have fun?

LVhandbagsatdawn · 25/11/2025 22:07

I'm going to be blunt:

Your hair sounds absolutely fine. Who cares if it's not styled? I never style my hair.

You've done brilliantly to lose 150lb. If you want to lose more then by all means keep going, but if you really think you look "exactly the same" after losing nearly 11 stone then you need therapy, not a diet.

Given your analysis of how you look even after that incredible weight loss, I would bet the farm that there's nothing seriously wrong with your nose or your teeth.

Its quite clear the issue is rock bottom self confidence and self esteem. That is what will be putting people off.

I would seriously advise getting yourself into therapy rather than trying to save up for a nose job that I highly doubt you need.

Flabs · 25/11/2025 22:06

You sound like you are describing me! But honestly beauty comes from within ❤️ men are genuinely attracted to confidence - you must feel great losing that weight - put on your favourite outfit, do your make up and smile at your achievements- you’d be surprised how much response you get from a confident smile xx

Original poster
AutumnLeavesandKnittedJumpers · 25/11/2025 22:05

Aliceisagooddog · 25/11/2025 22:04

I'm sorry you are feeling so down about this. You do sound very critical of yourself. You have done amazing to lose so much weight. What else do you have in your life, career, hobbies etc?
I'm sure you have many good qualities, sounds like you need to work on your self esteem.

My career is shit. I’m band 2 nhs. I spent 8+ years training for a career I realised I hated and started over, because I needed to get out for my own mental health. I’ll never own my own home, I’m not good at anything other than baking and let’s be real that’s a pretty rubbish hobby to have

OP posts:
Aliceisagooddog · 25/11/2025 22:04

I'm sorry you are feeling so down about this. You do sound very critical of yourself. You have done amazing to lose so much weight. What else do you have in your life, career, hobbies etc?
I'm sure you have many good qualities, sounds like you need to work on your self esteem.