I’m coming to terms with the fact I’m really very ugly

You've lost 150 pounds?? Omg how amazing is that!! Well done.
I can understand the teeth thing as I was very conscious of my teeth. I recently got composite bonding instead of braces and its made a huge difference. If you genuinely wanted braces alot of dentists do payment plans. I bet your nose and hair look fine to everyone else. You sound down in yourself, I bet you look much better than you think and in any case being pretty isn't the most important thing! You sound a decent human. Wishing you the best x

You should absolutely speak to a therapist about this. You don’t want to waste your life feeling this way. Even if what you say is true - which I’m sure it isn’t, you need to reframe your thinking to be more positive and look for joy in other areas. I can promise you most romantic relationships are not what they appear and there’s a lot to be said about decentering men, I think very few women, regardless of beauty, are actually happy in relationships. If I could have my time again I would spend more time focusing on me, friendship and hobbies.

It’s all about how you present yourself!
It really is confidence & personal style.

There are people worse looking than you who have found love, and plenty of it.

I bet you’re beautiful & are struggling with self esteem issues.

I agree with everyone else OP, none of us know what you look like, but we can tell you definitely sound very unhappy and depressed, and you clearly have a deeply negative skewed view of yourself. Please see your GP about your low mood and find a therapist. Why would that be a "piss take?" Why do you feel so undeserving?

You clearly have brains and the ability to focus on your goals, which puts you way ahead of the average person. And you're so young, you have tons of time to figure out a fulfilling career that suits you. Come off the dating apps for now, because it's making you feel like crap, and you can't possibly build a positive relationship with someone until you learn to be nicer to yourself and to esteem yourself more highly.

I bet you would look great with a short hair cut. I know you're going to answer that you're too fat, but bigger women look GREAT with short hair--do a google. The short hair isn't going to fix the fact that you feel fundamentally unloveable though. If you don't want to do talk therapy, pick up a copy of We Women Everywhere. I don't do well with self help books, but that one was great.

If you want to feel better about your looks perhaps pay for a session with a really good hairdresser to get advice on what haircut would suit you best.

Clothes can also do a lot. Supermodels look good in anything but the rest of us mere mortals need to dress to flatter their body shape/colouring. I've heard good things about colourmebeautiful stylists.

You could also potentially get braces now as an adult. Obviously not a quick or cheap fix but perhaps worth it if it keeps you feel able to smile freely.

But I also agree with the other posters saying you need to change your mindset. Have a look at couples in cafés/parks/on the street. Are all the women thin, perfect hair and drop dead beautiful? No. They're normal people just like you. Lots don't have perfect teeth and if you're a size 16 you're pretty average for the UK (though incredibly well done on your weightloss! Hope you keep it up if it helps you gain confidence).

It really is true that people are attracted to a positive attitude and confidence. Just think - would you fancy a man who hides away from the world and constantly runs down his own looks? (Not saying you're doing this, I'm just giving an example). Someone upbeat and fun to be around would be much more attractive!

Sounds like you have hobbies and are living life. That's great, keep cultivating that (side note, is there any way of starting a side business making fancy cakes or something?). Then to actually meet a potential bf... I admit it's not easy to find the right man. Just remember that you don't need lots of people to want to date you - you just need one person to like you and to like them back.

It's often easier to feel relaxed when there's not the immediate pressure of a date, so perhaps stay off the dating apps for a bit until you feel more confident in yourself. You could instead join a hobby group where you'll get to know new people. Try meetup.com - there are groups for photography/boardgames/coffee/languages/chess/hiking and pretty much anything else you can think of.

Absolutely this OP. It’s not your appearance but your attitude to yourself.
Work on your self esteem.
I promise you that people don’t care how you look. They’re more interested in how you behave and come across and at present it’s very negative.
I bet there’s nothing wrong with your appearance . You're just being very hard on yourself.

It's a great hobby to have, and you can make a career out of it. I'm not saying you should, but if you want to, there's people who do that. And if you want a husband and kids (there's nothing wrong with not having those, that's your choice!), they'll no doubt love to get involved too.
Decent men and women aren't obsessed with looks; even if you were the most classically beautiful super model, looks fade, and when my kids are old enough to date, I'd much rather they chose a kind person.

Sack the gym for something with more of a community spirit. Find a local fitness class in a hall somewhere . Any of the dance fitness classes I go to or run are just full of people who can be nervous to make friends, and it happens there eventually!

braces are bloody expensive but good orthodontists can have fair payment plans. Don’t go to a dentist for that, shop around and see if it can be made affordable

genuinely though I think therapy for your self esteem and mental health will make everything else fall into place, I think this should be a priority.

I’m a band 2 in the NHS too Op, IT based. I love my job. But would you tell me my job is shit? If not, why do you think it’s ok to be this unkind about your own job situation? It would be pretty unkind of you to tell all your colleges they’re also shit for being band 2’s no? I think you really should consider seeing a therapist, you may be able to access this via occy health. And a trip to your GP would be beneficial.
By the way, baking is an excellent hobby! And well done on your amazing weight loss.

You are so young! Anything can happen, and life can change quickly. Be open to new things!

I know many people who thought they'd be alone forever then suddenly met someone, myself included - I was single for a decade, then at 36 met DH and within 11 months was engaged. It's so hard when you don't have the certainty of knowing when you'll meet someone. I wish, with hindsight, that I'd been bolder in asking people out but I didn't have confidence for that until I was 40!

Hair, noses and teeth don't matter. Do you think only people with thick hair, perfect noses and straight teeth have happy marriages?! But you can save up for braces if you want to - make a plan! Congratulations on your weight loss.

I have found it very common amongst my friends that the older we get the more confident we get in who we are. Be patient with yourself.

Also - nothing wrong with baking. The way to a man's heart etc.

Most people are mediocre, it's a great place to be! We all have a place.

I look the exact same as I did 150lbs ago.

Bollocks. Nobody - literally nobody - loses 150lbs without look radically different. That's more than 10 stone. It's physically impossible to lose over 10 stone without looking any different.

You're obviously very depressed and have major problems with self-esteem and body image, and you need help. I'm really sorry you're feeling like this, but posts like this aren't going to help you. You need professional counselling or therapy.

I wish you could see how young you are and how many opportunities you have.

The horrible experience is clouding your judgement. Would you consider a career as a youth support worker or youth probation officer, your degree would be welcomed, the money in youth support is very good.

A friend of mine is on €50,000 as a support worker for youth reach. She has a degree in childcare that was transferable.

I think you would be great at it, empathic and compassionate.

I'm rooting for you.

I don't think attacking her parents is particularly helpful. OP has said she didn't qualify for NHS treatment as her teeth weren't actually that bad, she's clearly being overly critical about her looks.

OP please go to the GP. If the last one wasn't helpful, try someone else. Did a previous GP really tell you to just lose weight when you had been self harming? Because that's outrageous.

I agree with PPs that it's the negativity rather than your looks that's causing the issue. You really need some help with your self esteem.

Baking is wonderful. Creative and a giving of love to others through feeding them beautiful things. And everyone loves cakes.
I am c.size 14/16 and I find lots of flattering things to wear - I choose things that suit me whether fashionable or not and go for the flamboyant and the unusual. You can do the same - striking is a darn sight better than pretty, too!
You could fix your teeth - discuss a payment plan with your dentist, they will surely have one. (I actually don't understand about not qualifying for NHS braces as a child, though. My DD had very mildly incorrect teeth and she had braces to correct them.)
And of course you will have your own home and romance. You need a boost to your self-esteem - and your soft hair sounds lovely, just get it properly cut.
And if you hate your job then start thinking about a new career (it's never too late).

I have very very fine hair and have a short bob which makes it look thicker and is much easier to maintain and very cheap to cut and colour.

Ditch the expensive extensions and faffing with your hair and spend money on teeth instead. There’s always hair bands, hats and wigs to cover hair. There’s no way of hiding from bad teeth (if they’re as bad as you say).

What really stands out in your first post is that you lost 150 pounds. This is remarkable. I'd love to be a size 16-18. At that size you can still pick nice things up in shops. It's a really nice size (says I, around a size 24 right now). You also had the guts to start over in your career. What comes across is that you are very determined.

I'm pretty old now but I remember the yearning in my 20s and 30s for men who weren't interested. You can waste years like that. All I would say, is find something to like about yourself, and then something else, and do things you enjoy, just for the enjoyment of them. If people are laughing at you in the gym, there is something wrong with them, not you.

Hi OP, first of all you’ve done amazing to lose weight. I think you sound interesting and like you’d be good company. I’m not saying you are ugly at all however my two cents..

I have always felt ugly. I have pale skin, dark circles and I’ve a huge nose. I have had all sorts of comments in my life about it. I hate photos, I don’t like seeing what I look like I just feel awful.

What I did when I was younger was to find things to do to distract myself from looks. What do you enjoy?
What are you passionate about?

I always loved music and sitcoms so I made myself very knowledgable about both, listened to classic albums.
I’d be the person to go to for those topics in a quiz!

You can try to make your body the best it can be.
Do you enjoy any exercise, weights, sports?
This can be a good focus point. Don’t bother with gyms , choose something you can do cheaply and (maybe) alone.
As you get better and your body gets stronger you will gain confidence.
You may develop the exercise to doing it in a class/with others and could surprise yourself by meeting people , friends, through these avenues.

Chose 1 area of your body to focus to try to make yourself feel a little better.
Teeth sound like your main area of concern. Could you speak to the dentist about a credit plan for potential treatments? I know my dentist offer this.

Remember you are worthy of love and happiness.

Sorry if this sounds trite, I wish you all the best x

You sound depressed.

I also have very fine hair that won't take a style so I have it down, layer it and wash and go. I don't even blow dry it. The secret is finding a great hairdresser who will help you work out a great style.

I would see a therapist about low self esteem. Also you are so young. Focus on enjoying yourself, developing a skill like singing, baking (you say you're great) and join groups that welcome your contribution.

Learn to love yourself and the rest will follow.

You are being so very hard on yourself. If a friend came to you and told you this was how she was feeling how would you talk to her? We are our own harshest critics and we need to learn to talk kindly to ourselves.
Look I am fat and have pcos so am positively bald in places I have had psoriasis all my life so have had periods of horrendous skin . I am infertile and menopausal. But I am here doing the best I can with what I have . I'm twice your age and spent far too long apologising for all my flaws when I was younger. Please don't do that any more.

OP go and check out Invisalign tomorrow! Get busy. You’re great. Sorry you had a tough time at university but congratulations on coming through with great results. Believe in yourself!

What @TiredofLDN just said 🫶🏻🫶🏻

Lots of ugly people in relationships out there. You just need to get out there more, start a new hobby that gets you involved with people like parkrun or something.

don’t be so down on yourself. I am objectively pretty ugly too and have a husband and kids… it’s all about spending time with other people and letting that bond slowly develop with people.