Is this now normal 8/9 year old girl behaviour?

Nothing like this with mine and she is in Year 6. I know some of them are into skincare but mine has no interest so far (Thank God!)
Edited to say I believe the skincare phenomenon has come from Tik Tok but she doesn't have access to that and we don't do phones.

We had some of that creeping in last year with dd1 when she was in year 3 but I think that was the teacher style, she never seems to challenge anything. This year the new teacher is more on stuff and I've not heard anything about any issues

I think it's normal. Not pleasant, but normal. I was at school long before kids had phones but I remember being laughed at in year 5 because I watched children's after school TV and cartoons. The other girls were into sitcoms and Eastenders! Yes, I was the eldest child, and we only had one TV in the house.

So the details have changed but I don't think this is anything new.

This pretty much describes my 8yo 😂

I’m a year 4 teacher and this is normal for some of the girls. My most recent class (currently on mat leave) had 18 girls. I’d say around 8 of them were still “little girls” who liked teddies and had Disney backpacks and just wanted to playa me write stories. But then the other 10 were always arguing, very bitchy towards each other, always falling out, lots of dramas. They all had PLouise lip glosses and talked about makeup and YouTube. Fascinating to watch!

I don't recognise this at all.

My y4 daughter still has to be told to wash her face about 6 times, let alone caring about skincare. A good day for her is it I pick her clothes so she doesn't have to 😂.

She likes toys, and pretending to be a cat, and playing with play doh and making potions from crap in the garden.

She's a kid still, and her and her friends live in a world of imagination and fantasy.

The PP who says is all depends on whether the class is made up of eldest or younger siblings has it spot on IME - yr4 was horrible for DD as she was pretty much the only girl in her (very boy heavy) year group who hadn’t got an older sister so she was completely on the outside. It got slightly better in yr5, largely because she hung out with boys instead! She’s in a different school for yr6 and it’s completely changed - she’s in a class that’s well balanced in terms of gender ratios but also most of the girls are eldest or onlies and there is zero drama, no one is really into skincare beyond lipgloss and only one child has a phone. Moving her has been the best decision we could have made

Mine will get a phone mid year 6. I fully agree they aren't appropriate or necessary in primary, but she will likely have one for secondary, and we feel its better for her to start getting used to how to sensibly use one whilst still with friends we know well. It will be locked down to just talk and whatts app. In year 5 I don't know any of DD's friends who have a proper phone. A few say they have one but it's actually a parents old one without a SIM in it, so use more like a tablet.

Urgh year 4/5 were hard going. It gets better.

Wait until she becomes a teenager 🙈🙈🙈🙈

I have 8&10yo girls and their friends are lovely. No big dramas. Some girls will wear some makeup to school discos, but it’s usually bright blue eyeshadow etc and seems more like dressing up. Though there’s definitely parents who frown at other parents for allowing and it’s in minority. None of their friends have phones, I think they’d probably all like one but know there’s no chance. Some girls have clearly started puberty. One of my eldests friends I know started her periods in year 4, and is such a lovely caring girl - no bitchiness cause of hormones. Some of their friends have crushes and some aren’t interested at all. They’re very supportive and encouraging of each other.

The boys however are (mostly) horrid. It’s changed my interpretation of slugs, snails and puppy dog tails….. pretty sure it was meant they pulled the puppy dog tails off themselves….

That’s in 2 cohorts!! I’d think maybe it’s a school specific issue.

Its hilarious that ye all have the kids that are not like those kids. 🤔

Even worse that people think its just girls. The boys are just as bad.

And all you women sitting there enabling your boys to think girls are just dramatic and mean are actually the worst.

Seems to me ye are a bunch of mean girls judging some kids.

Seems common. My daughter is 8, one of the older ones in her class.
Majority of her class already have a phone, in fact a girl she has played with since nursery but is only 7, has just been given a phone.
All wear makeup, have their eyebrows shaped, won't play outside if its windy incase their hair gets ruined.
They all fall out quite a lot but make up just as quick.
I have two younger girls also, pray for me. And maybe send gin

My DD is in year six and we’ve had none of this. She and her friends are mostly into musicals and animals, and the falling out are all temporary and easily resolved.
mind you, I get the impression that things might be different with some of the other girls, who she isn’t friendly with (not enemies, just they don’t hang out). That group seems a lot more “mature” (they get skincare products at Christmas etc) and from what I can tell their friendships are more volatile. I think we were really lucky that there are other girls like my DD in her class or else she would be in with that crowd.

A bit of unkindness here and there which thankfully the school are quick to squash (and the parent messaged to apologise also and a written note of apology from the other girl on the following day).

They do all seem quite self aware at a much younger age. It seems some of the girls have a natural instinct at game playing and cattiness and some just don’t yet.

No skincare or crop tops yet either (not allowed unless on summer hols anyway in this house!).

Or others in the class, my daughter asks regularly to go to Sephora - yet to visit as I always avoid it. My make up is older than she is I wear it so rarely - its just not my thing. I last went to a Sephora in 2005!

She has friends who get bought £35 lip glosses as a treat - I wouldn't even by it for a birthday present!

Flip side of my daughter we still have a stack of Our Generation that she will play with but no one is allowed to know!

Crop tops were banned in my ds primary (state) and now in his secondary (private). Very few girls wore makeup in year 6.

Thankfully this is not the case with us.

Some bff issues but no meanness. No make up or crop top.

This is a cohort with very few girls having teenage sisters, and most parents are dead against social media / smart phone until secondary school.

I agree. Only have boys but the mean girls def do have mean mums. Those who don't get pulled up immediately for nasty behaviour.
@Orangeorganic I am sure there are Nice girls in your dds class- she just have to stick to them and ignore the others.

In my experience it heavily depends on each particular class, it can only take one or two nasty girls to totally change the dynamic in a group of kids.

Yes

And the ones to blame are the parents of these girls, the mothers are mostly to blame. Mean women raising mean daughters because they felt inadequate at school.

Mean girls yes, absolutely, and crop tops. Lovely school and my older son never had any issues so pretty sure it's normal for girls in this age group. There seem to be a lot of power games going on with a fight for the 'queen bee' position and if you don't have a BFF you're a nobody. I haven't heart much about skin care..yet. You sound like you've got one who tells you everything like me. It's exhausting but I'm glad she is able to get it off her chest. From memory I think it all gets better in sixth form.

We don't see this at my dd's school. It's a little village christian school, although I'm not sure many of the students/parents are actually religious, but the school does instill good ethics. There's also not very many pupils there which probably helps. It may be that my dd has been lucky enough to have a good set of friends, but I've not heard or seen any of the above things mentioned. The thought of secondary school scares me tbh as I think it'll be a big jump from what they have now.

Previous generations blamed TV…music… even books.

Everu generation blames something.