Page 2 | How unreasonable would it be to lie about my son’s age so he can join our gym?

WinoLino · 2025-11-24T17:41:10+00:00

He’s 14. Getting into things he shouldn’t be getting into a bit. I think the gym would be a great distraction. Me, his dad and his 18 year old sister all go to the gym. It’s aged 16 and up though. I’m a rule follower at all times so I’m not saying we will do it. However, how unreasonable would it be if we were to say he is 16? Is it even possible, thinking they might want to see ID. He will train only with us and his dad really knows what he’s doing (has spent his whole life training in the gym) so the risk of injury is lessened but of course it’s there nonetheless. Am I not thinking straight?

Owly11 · 25/11/2025 08:05

Lamentingalways · 24/11/2025 17:55

I would lie. If they ask for ID then just cancel. You’re not going to sue if he gets injured and he’ll be supervised.

Please refrain from responding to my post if you’re not OP. This is MY opinion and there’s no point asking for opinions on a forum if honestly leads to being roasted. Because all you get then are the people who always do the right (moral) thing answering and it actually skews the results rendering it pointless.

I'm replying to you just because i don't like being told what to do 😂 and all comments should be open to question and debate. People who commit insurance fraud raise insurance premiums for all of us but you crack on.

IAmKerplunk · 25/11/2025 08:04

Might be worth asking your ds school if they get any discounts with any local gyms. I know you said you don’t want to consider other gyms but it’s worth a shot. My ds school offered 1530-1700 free gym usage at the local council run gym once a week for 12-16yrs. The take up was huge. The gym then offered a monthly membership at a discount and the kids could go whenever they want. I think it was a £15 a month. My ds15 now goes 3-4 times a week and loves it.

Golf is a good shout. Also guitar lessons?

Is he wanting (or are you) something that can be done as a family? Something you have in common with each other? Or something where he can meet new friends?

CalmConfident · 25/11/2025 08:03

Golf…go try local par 3 first (you can hire clubs). Some also have foot golf

CaptainMyCaptain · 25/11/2025 07:58

WallaceinAnderland · 24/11/2025 17:42

It may invalidate their insurance should he be injured. Also it's fraud.

This was my first thought.

CalmConfident · 25/11/2025 07:57

And another vote for parkrun! Do his
school do Duke of Edinburgh?

CalmConfident · 25/11/2025 07:56

A totally different suggestion….get a dartboard for home.

We have one in the garage and it’s something the DS & DH do to chill out. It’s an alone activity, good for introverts but lots of publicity with Luke Littler recent success. Fills time nicely and needs little space

Andonthatbombshell · 25/11/2025 07:35

Fire or police cadets?
Big and junior parkrun, running and volunteering. Start building his cv!

Wordless · 25/11/2025 07:34

I was speaking from professional experience, @Thatsalineallright.

MaraMar · 25/11/2025 07:14

Some gyms do allow teenagers. Our gym do afternoons 3.30pm until 5.30pm twice a week specifically for 11-16 year old, they have extra staff on hand etc. I'm sure there will be one near you that allow under 16s

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 25/11/2025 07:11

My 14 year old goes to the gym....She needed to show her passport to join. She is not allowed in spa bit or to use weights.

hotblacktea · 25/11/2025 07:08

stupidity in full display from people here urging you to ignore insurance, safety and rules
don't do it op, there are other gyms

Original poster

WinoLino · 25/11/2025 07:02

jeaux90 · 25/11/2025 06:58

Local tennis clubs are great value and do junior coaching nights/weekends/half terms it’s a great social sport if he isn’t into things like Rugby. I would suggest a few golf lessons but they are quite expensive as it the kit but golf clubs are a very good place to get a teen distracted!

He did express an interest in golf a while back so might explore that. Our best friend is a tennis coach but DS is not interested. Although he comes across as confident, he’s actually quite introverted so I think it is the idea of being coached he doesn’t like. Equally he has said no to any lessons or groups of anything.

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WinoLino · 25/11/2025 07:00

Whyherewego · 25/11/2025 06:58

Controversial I know but I did "round up" for both my sons. They are very tall and were both over 6ft at 15. So I did enrol them in the gym to go with me and said they were 16.
14 maybe is a bit too much of a gap though ?

Thank you. Yes it is, a year and a half.

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WinoLino · 25/11/2025 06:59

summitfever · 25/11/2025 06:55

I also think given I know and use the exact setup you are talking about there’s a lot of people in here getting their knickers in a massive twist. Supervised gyms let younger kids in, these ones don’t as they aren’t staffed. If the kid is going with his actual parents it’s a non issue. Not like you’re letting him loose on an active building site op it’s a few machines. Make sure he knows not to bench on his own etc and there’s no more risk than actually being out hanging around building sites and the likes!

It is staffed when we go but yes, not at certain times. I’m not going to do it but I’ll speak to the gym staff tonight and see what they say/any suggestions. Likely to just be, “come back in a year and a half” but I’m just trying to consider everything that might help.

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Whyherewego · 25/11/2025 06:58

Controversial I know but I did "round up" for both my sons. They are very tall and were both over 6ft at 15. So I did enrol them in the gym to go with me and said they were 16.
14 maybe is a bit too much of a gap though ?

jeaux90 · 25/11/2025 06:58

Local tennis clubs are great value and do junior coaching nights/weekends/half terms it’s a great social sport if he isn’t into things like Rugby. I would suggest a few golf lessons but they are quite expensive as it the kit but golf clubs are a very good place to get a teen distracted!

Original poster

WinoLino · 25/11/2025 06:56

PurpleSkies2026 · 24/11/2025 19:56

I'm sure I've seen kids with adults in my gym. Maybe you could arrange a tour with an adult to get him into the idea. Buy some hand weights In the meantme. Or a Private PT lesson. I personally think gym is a great distraction. Brilliant for my adhd.

Yes I too have ADHD and it’s been extremely helpful for me! And peri menopause symptoms. Never ever thought I would enjoy the gym 🥱

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summitfever · 25/11/2025 06:55

I also think given I know and use the exact setup you are talking about there’s a lot of people in here getting their knickers in a massive twist. Supervised gyms let younger kids in, these ones don’t as they aren’t staffed. If the kid is going with his actual parents it’s a non issue. Not like you’re letting him loose on an active building site op it’s a few machines. Make sure he knows not to bench on his own etc and there’s no more risk than actually being out hanging around building sites and the likes!

Original poster

WinoLino · 25/11/2025 06:53

HelpMeUnpickThis · 24/11/2025 20:22

What religion is he / are you? You mentioned Soul Church - there are some fabulous online church services if you are not able to take him to some of the group meetings.

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I’ve suggested this before and he didn’t want to but I’m going to suggest it again, great idea.

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WinoLino · 25/11/2025 06:51

Claricecannotsleep · 25/11/2025 06:44

It’s not a dilemma. Obey the rules. He’s too young. And if they’re any good they will ask for ID. You won’t be the first parent thinking this is a ‘good idea’. What about running with you or his dad instead?

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Please RTWT.

We don’t like running outside but thank you.

His step dad has suggested doing more with him like pool in the evenings and the odd football match when we can so I think that will help also as DS is close to him obviously. Anything to stop him spending too much time alone.

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summitfever · 25/11/2025 06:51

I’ve used my older kids details to make a membership and my younger kid 14 has access to it (the older one wouldn’t be seen dead in a gym). It’s the same gym I use she’s perfectly safe. Safer than knocking about in the dark in winter anyway! There’s a tonne of younger kids in there

Original poster

WinoLino · 25/11/2025 06:48

Randomchat · 25/11/2025 06:45

My 14 yr old plays rugby. There's lots of strength and weight training goes along with that.

But if you're that concerned about him I'd suck up a change of gym for 2 years. Even if it's inconvenient.

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I might consider a change in gym but it’s not just inconvenience. It’s also that money is tight and the one I go to is a cheap 24/7 gym and the ones near me that offer a 14 year old to go are more like the ones that are upwards of £50 a month. I just can’t afford that.

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WinoLino · 25/11/2025 06:46

AutumnClouds · 24/11/2025 20:44

Gym culture can have its downsides too so sport might be a better bet. Not sure that playing guitar makes drug taking less likely! Brazilian jiu jitsu, Muay Thai or climbing all have fairly healthy subcultures full of potential role models as well as being a good way to burn off some worries.

I’m less worried about him trying weed again as the conditions he tried them in aren’t going to come about again. I’m more worried about why he tried it. He’s very sensitive and a deep thinker and I think time spent doing anything else (guitar included) will be good for the part of his brain that is hypermentalising. Creativity is powerful essentially. And being good at something will increase his esteem.

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Randomchat · 25/11/2025 06:45

WinoLino · 24/11/2025 18:16

Any advice regarding how to help 14 year old boys feel better about themselves without resorting to alcohol or weed?

My 14 yr old plays rugby. There's lots of strength and weight training goes along with that.

But if you're that concerned about him I'd suck up a change of gym for 2 years. Even if it's inconvenient.

Claricecannotsleep · 25/11/2025 06:44

WinoLino · 24/11/2025 17:58

@LamentingalwaysThank you, I completely agree! No I wouldn’t sue in a million years, wouldn’t cross my mind to. Oh what a dilemma

It’s not a dilemma. Obey the rules. He’s too young. And if they’re any good they will ask for ID. You won’t be the first parent thinking this is a ‘good idea’. What about running with you or his dad instead?