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AIBU?

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Is this admission fraud? AIBU to report it?

907 replies

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 16:21

Here's the situation.

We live in a grammar school catchment area that gets smaller every year. When we bought our house several years ago, it was very comfortably within the catchment for an excellent local grammar (very high in the league tables), and oh boy was it reflected in the price. Now we're right on the boundary. Among the thirty or so houses around us, some children got in last year and some didn't, literally a difference of a few yards.

Another child on our street, who is in the same class as my DC, only just passed the 11+ (a few points above the pass threshold). We live on the same road, but they are about 50 yards further from the school gate. Based on last year's distances, my child would likely get a place while theirs wouldn't.

Over the weekend, during a sleepover, the child mentioned that her mother has now rented a house much closer to the school to secure a higher priority for admission. The tenancy was apparently signed one day before the cut-off date, making it "legal" for admission purposes. She still owns their original home, but the story being presented is that relatives who were previously "homeless" will now live there free of charge, and all bills and utilities have been transferred into those relatives' names (I strongly suspect that the mother will in fact pay these bills as those relatives are penniless).

She's even moved the children's belongings to the rented property and makes them spend nights there (they hate it). There's no doubt that once the school place is obtained, they will move right back.

This effectively pushes my child down the priority list and means they may now miss out.

Would this constitute admissions fraud? It feels incredibly unfair that someone with £40k to spare for rent can effectively buy their way into a top grammar school, especially when their child didn't perform particularly well in the exam (despite being tutored for hours every day).

Should I report this? I have no more detail apart from what this child told me (and they obviously weren't too sure about some aspects of it due to age).

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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Coconutter24 · 24/11/2025 19:03

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 16:58

They are not on general refugee but on one of special schemes (that is renewed every year).
I know a lot as this is my DC's best friend, and I thought the mum was my friend too.

Why do you now think the mum isn’t your friend?

staceyflack · 24/11/2025 19:00

My thoughts exactly @KarmenPQZ 😅 But ignorance is bliss.

SouthLondonMum22 · 24/11/2025 19:00

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:55

All of them could easily fit into her owned house without it even coming close to being legally overcrowded. If this were genuinely about necessity, surely that would be the logical arrangement?

I wouldn't want to live with relatives unless I absolutely had to. Why would it be the logical arrangement if they can clearly afford a rental in the same area?

puppymaddness · 24/11/2025 19:00

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:55

All of them could easily fit into her owned house without it even coming close to being legally overcrowded. If this were genuinely about necessity, surely that would be the logical arrangement?

Omg again none of your business!!!

Scarlettpixie · 24/11/2025 18:59

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:55

All of them could easily fit into her owned house without it even coming close to being legally overcrowded. If this were genuinely about necessity, surely that would be the logical arrangement?

But why should she house share if they don’t want to? This is just none of your business is it? Sounds like them needing a house presented an opportunity and she took it.

Megifer · 24/11/2025 18:59

Andfinallyphew · 24/11/2025 18:51

Hallelujah
so a colleague, must have made for a tense office environment!

No it didnt.

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:58

Lougle · 24/11/2025 18:56

Because £40k now saves £160k in future fees for years 8-11.

Exactly. So the £40K is not expected to be a repeat annual expense, is it?

Thank you.

OP posts:
Nevernonono · 24/11/2025 18:58

KarmenPQZ · 24/11/2025 16:32

It feels incredibly unfair that someone with £40k to spare for rent can effectively buy their way into a top grammar school

but you effectively did the same by paying over the odds for a house within the catchment that someone with less spare money than you couldn’t afford. So you also bought your way in. Thats the whole problem with the system

This!

Also, what is the relevance that the child passed the exam by only a few marks, it’s a pass, don’t be so unkind.

Trixibell1234 · 24/11/2025 18:58

Wickedlittledancer · 24/11/2025 17:24

Grammars by default have an entrance exam, then places are allocated on a descending list based on highest score down. I am really not sure the op is correct that you just need to pass and then it’s a free for all and solely based on proximity to the school.

Where I live, for the grammars if you get over a certain threshold, say 200 points, then it just goes on distance to the school. So child A could get 201 and get in before child B with 299 if child A lived nearer.

Andfinallyphew · 24/11/2025 18:57

if I knew how you’d grilled my 10 year old, I’d be far crosser about that then you are about this.

FlipzMilk · 24/11/2025 18:57

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:55

All of them could easily fit into her owned house without it even coming close to being legally overcrowded. If this were genuinely about necessity, surely that would be the logical arrangement?

Why do you not share a house with family and fund an independent school, as you expect the other woman to do?

Crochetandtea · 24/11/2025 18:56

SoftBalletShoes · 24/11/2025 16:56

Seriously. That rent could have bought a crazy amount of extra tuition.

But you can’t buy brains. Tutoring can only do so much.

Lougle · 24/11/2025 18:56

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:32

Excellent question, isn't it?

How does it make any sense to spend around £40K a year on rent and bills for a house next to the school when a perfectly good local private option is about £25K?

If that isn't proof she has no intention of actually living there, I really don't know what is.

Because £40k now saves £160k in future fees for years 8-11.

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:55

Scarlettpixie · 24/11/2025 18:53

Oh and as for saying what size of house someone should live in..! On that basis it makes sense for the family to live in the larger of the two properties. Or are you trying to imply they should all have just lived together?!

Fwiw I live (alone now except for uni breaks) in a 5 bed house but that doesn’t mean I want to, or should be expected to house share. I am thinking of selling up (downsizing) and am considering renting for a bit to put myself in a better position as a buyer. Is that allowed under your weird system of rules about not being allowed to take any steps to improve your position?

All of them could easily fit into her owned house without it even coming close to being legally overcrowded. If this were genuinely about necessity, surely that would be the logical arrangement?

OP posts:
twistyizzy · 24/11/2025 18:55

FlipzMilk · 24/11/2025 17:47

You would think with a falling birth rate there would be less competition.

VAT on school fees is increasing pressure on grammar schools in some areas. Some reported record numbers sitting 11+ this year

Donttellempike · 24/11/2025 18:54

Bananaandmangosmoothie · 24/11/2025 18:52

My child went to a grammar. A super selective one. I am under no illusion at to the fairness or otherwise of the whole process .
I would never have taken my bitterness out on a 10 year old child

Easy to say from the vantage point of someone who’s child got in. Of course you would have behaved entirely magnanimously if they had not. 🙄

He didn’t pass for the school we preferred. And I didn’t feel any spite towards the child who did. , because I’m not vile

Zanatdy · 24/11/2025 18:54

I can’t believe posters are trying to say that this woman renting out a house and pretending to live there is the same as OP deciding to buy a family home in catchment of a good grammar. Of course it’s not the same. It’s playing the system and unfair on the children who may miss out and end up in a crap school as their parent has lied. Without a doubt, this place will be rented until the child starts and that will be that. She has clearly decided it’s cheaper to do that than pay for 7yrs of private school.

I know someone who rented out their house and rented a house within catchment of a good school as all secondaries in their area were poor. She did stay another 2yrs though until her son got into the school then moved back home. At least they actually moved though, unlikely this woman. I would 100% complain if they get a space over your child.

BlueSeagull · 24/11/2025 18:54

Leave them to it, they are just trying to give their child the best opportunity they can, surely everyone does that

Scarlettpixie · 24/11/2025 18:53

Oh and as for saying what size of house someone should live in..! On that basis it makes sense for the family to live in the larger of the two properties. Or are you trying to imply they should all have just lived together?!

Fwiw I live (alone now except for uni breaks) in a 5 bed house but that doesn’t mean I want to, or should be expected to house share. I am thinking of selling up (downsizing) and am considering renting for a bit to put myself in a better position as a buyer. Is that allowed under your weird system of rules about not being allowed to take any steps to improve your position?

grammarmom · 24/11/2025 18:53

FlipzMilk · 24/11/2025 18:49

It's interesting that OP thinks that the former friend should spend money on an independent school and OP should not. OP didn't buy a cheaper home and pay for an education, instead she chose to move to England in a catchment of a taxpayers funded school.

Both my husband and I moved to England as children, when our parents came here to work in highly specialised fields. We've been secretly cultivating this grand plan to fleece English taxpayers for almost 35 years now.

OP posts:
Bananaandmangosmoothie · 24/11/2025 18:52

Donttellempike · 24/11/2025 18:44

💯 this.

Absolutely horrible. The whole set up is unfair. But that’s fine as long as her little darling gets in.

My child went to a grammar. A super selective one. I am under no illusion at to the fairness or otherwise of the whole process .

I would never have taken my bitterness out on a 10 year old child

My child went to a grammar. A super selective one. I am under no illusion at to the fairness or otherwise of the whole process .
I would never have taken my bitterness out on a 10 year old child

Easy to say from the vantage point of someone who’s child got in. Of course you would have behaved entirely magnanimously if they had not. 🙄

quantumbutterfly · 24/11/2025 18:51

FlipzMilk · 24/11/2025 17:47

You would think with a falling birth rate there would be less competition.

Many areas have a paucity of grammar schools but are still densely populated with ambitious parents. Journey times to school can end up an hour plus each way so when you factor in homework too, it leaves little time for much else in a young life.

Perhaps a little competition is healthy but it's noticeable that the successful cohorts are mostly tutored or prep-schooled. I know of one lad who failed the 11+ but parents had him IQ tested and his genius score got him a place.

Trixibell1234 · 24/11/2025 18:51

Where I live the schools ask for evidence that you’ve sold your house if that’s what you say you’ve done. If you own it but rent it out they would consider the house you own to be your main residence. Also they want to see a long term rental document. So you never know. I’d report it. I live in a similar sounding area.

Andfinallyphew · 24/11/2025 18:51

Megifer · 24/11/2025 18:48

We weren't friends.

Hallelujah
so a colleague, must have made for a tense office environment!

BatshitOutofHell · 24/11/2025 18:49

Isthisit22 · 24/11/2025 18:48

The school would take this seriously. A family lost a place at my daughter’s school for pretending her grandmother’s was the main residence. The council tax has to be in the applicant’s name.

They're not pretending though. They are renting that place and can prove it.

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