AIBU to feel upset about my well-off in-laws being tight with money at Christmas?

Sorry but I think YABU. It’s not about what they can afford, they just don’t believe in buying expensive presents several times a year. They were probably brought up like that and have always lived like that. Do they have other grandchildren and are trying to spend equally on each of them?

Edited to say I see now that they do have other grandchildren. Would you have bern happy if they had given £100 for a new bike for one of the others and still given them the same value birthday and Christmas presents as they gave your son?

The drip feed that there are other grandchildren massively changes things. He's already had £100 of a gift, how much do you really expect a 7 year old to receive?
It sounds as if the GPs gave the money then realised the optics, so need to ensure all GCs are treated financially fairly.
You sound a bit grabby.
Giving huge numbers of gifts isn't what wealthy families do traditionally. It's a bit... vulgar.

Another word for trainers.

Your parents can do as they choose but that level of giving would be considered bizarre and uncalled for in our family and would be politely refused. And I'd be horrified if one of my children thought that £120 pa wasn't generous and think they had no concept of the value of money.

I would get your husband to politely ask his parents what the budget is for presents so you both can think in future what might be a good present. I have written down exactly what my parents and in laws spend so I can plan it all for our kids

What on earth are ‘runners?’

Bollocks. They are bloody mean.

Erm.. op has not told us how many grandkids there is. Where did you get multiple from? 🤣 even if they have multiple as you say. They sound very well off. My parents defo dont do three holidays a year.. and whats hogwash exactly. £120 to one child is not generous!! Its tight.

What hogwash. The grandparents have multiple children to buy for. Plus their own old age to secure, and god forbid some fun after a lifetime of working. Anything is generous.

I can’t imagine thinking like the OP. My DGP always gave me a gift such as an annual and one year it was a zip up pencil case with pens etc inside (I loved it). My DM and MIL bought my DC things that were the equivalent of about £20 today. Myself and my DC had lovely relationships with DGP’s. I couldn’t get worked up about them buying a book for my DC as opposed to what, a £35 toy for example?
Maybe I’m just not into stuff and I think £100 towards a bike earlier in the year when the weather was better is a really nice gesture/gift.
I think it’s really bad form to be expect gifts of a certain value.

£120 spend on your grandchild across the whole year is not generous. Im not saying they are obliged to give more but to say its generous is nonsense. My mum has paid, will pay for all her grandkids car insurance as well as all their usual gifts . that's generous!

Dh has 3 grandchildren and spends £50 each on them Xmas and birthdays. We are comfortable but £50 is plenty.

Good point. I wonder if the birthday child sent his grandparents a thank-you note for their contribution toward his new bike.

Would the OP have said "Oh, never mind about the bike then," if they had said up-front that the bike spanned two gift-giving occasions?

Well, without knowing what DH thinks about his parents' behaviour, it's difficult to call whether YABU. I mean, would DH agree that his parents are 'vile', 'revolting', 'scum' and that contact with DGC should be withheld, contact reduced overall and birthdays etc ignored? Perhaps not

I suspect it's as simple, as OP has obliquely indicated, that his parents are aiming for equality between multiple grandchildren and they've overshot by already giving £100 towards his bike. And that generally she doesn't like her in laws.

Maybe OP is BU, maybe she isn't. Who knows 🤷‍♀️

£100 for a bike plus £20 (say) for birthday and Christmas comes to £120 annual spend per grandchild. That sounds pretty generous to me but were very much a family where gifts bw members (except for parent to child) are about £25 a time.

To add, I do think it’s a bit of a drip feed to add the info about the other grandchildren, and your DH’s thoughts on this part way through the thread.

Perhaps the reason they can afford multiple holidays and paid off their mortgage is because they are frugal in other areas. Gifts are just that, gifts. There should be no expectation . . .

YABU. They are not required to spend their money on your child. They’ve done their bit with bringing up their own children.

I would feel the same OP
Like others have said I wouldn't want to receive anything else with obvious strings attached.
Are there any other grandchildren /

For Xmas and birthdays my kids got £10 each in a card.
Of course SIL kids were spoilt rotten.
Bumped into MIL and made sure to tell her/remind her that our eldest and her first grandchild would be turning 18 in a few weeks and just wants money and hoping he gets enough to put towards a car ....yes the usual £10 was sent through the post

Agree,
Dont worry op your family may get some money when they die.
Until then you'll have to suck it up.
Nobody likes to be told how to spend their cash.

On the contrary, the pile on consensus is that they're 'scum', 'revolting' etc

An elderly relative used to be very generous to all the grandDC for birthdays/Xmas but has stopped giving more than a token gift to DBs DC now as they never acknowledged receipt or even texted a 10 sec thank you message. She had a very tough upbringing (worked until 70 and now on a pension) and would think £100 is a huge amount for a child to receive. Could your relative be of the same mindset?

I think I can understand this. Originally my thoughts were that they were a bit mean, but it does make sense if your DH has siblings who have children, that they wouldn’t want to be seen favouring one grandchild above the others, and in doing so, perhaps cause resentment between your DH’s siblings. Is it even possible that what seems to be backtracking on their behalf could be the result of a comment by one of their other DC? Just a thought.

Speaking as a much older person myself, and a grandma to more kids than I can count on 2 hands, I still stand by what I said upthread. It is mean and mean spirited, too.

I don't have a great deal of money either, but there's ways and ways of going about things.