AIBU to say that if my boyfriend goes to the casino, he can’t sleep at our place that night?

This in spades, everything else is just noise.

Tell him if he goes to the casino he cant be your boyfriend.
then when he goes ... because he is an addict who loves gambling....
Dump him and Get a new boyfriend.

This level of gambling is a recipe for a life of unhappiness.
You cant build a future with a man who is willing to gamble it!!!

Run like the wind!

Thank goodness you found out he's a gambler when you're 19, not 39 with a family, debts and a mortgage. You're settling for nonsense when you have 70 years in front of you. Don't do it.

Or any age

In your other post you said you were both 20, in this post you are both 19?

Either way, gambling at 19 at a casino is not like putting the lottery on or grabbing a scratch card. He could lose some serious money and once you start to disappear down that hole its hard to get back out.

YABU to hitch yourself to a gambler at such a young age.

Precisely no one would get away with telling me i cant sleep in my own home after a night out.

But thats a red herring. He clearly has a gambling problem and believe me when i say they do not get over it until they have lost absolutely everything and hit rock bottom.

Youre 19. You need to get out of this mess of a relationship before he drags you down.

No, it's his house too. If you framed it as him not allowing you to stay in your own home after your night out, you'd say it was controlling. If his lifestyle is not compatible with yours then you need to move on.

This! Please get out now whilst you still can. Your future self will thank you!

I’m going to go against the grain and say I do think that you can live with someone and set sensible boundaries to protect your sleep and your wellbeing.

I would not be happy with a partner regularly (weekly) coming home so late that it was waking me up and impacting my health through poor sleep. Once a month, okay maybe, but not every week. I think part of the responsibility of living with someone is that you have to respect each other’s needs.

A night out gambling is a want, sleep is a need. My Dh, for example, we’re in our 40s with 2 children, doesn’t have a night out and come home after. If he’s going out (and it’s maybe 4 times a year) and not planning to be home before 10pm, he stays with a friend or they all get a room. My sleep is important and someone has to get up the next day and do the adulting. If that’s going to be me, he knows he has to let me get a proper night of sleep. If he really wants to go to the casino, surely he could go after work and be home by 9pm or he could go Saturday afternoon and be home for dinner.

All that said, I’ve got no time for gambling. Someone that hyped up on gambling at only 19 is in for a world of problems. I would not tie myself to him legally or financially and definitely do not have children!

Nailed it.

Speaking from experience… as above ^^

Think very very carefully about your future with him. Very carefully OP.
Good luck.

19 and spending his weekends in the casino! That’s a bit sad… he should be out clubbing!
like pp have said, you can’t ban him from his own home but you could ask him to sleep on the sofa if it’s affecting you getting a decent sleep. Especially if it’s a regular thing.
but I’d be more concerned about his hobby than where he’s sleeping…

Well you can't ban him from returning to his own home, surely?

Living with a gambler though will bring a whole realm of trouble and misery

Are you both paying the rent? If so you are being unreasonable. He's a grown man and should be able to come home even if he has been out late.

Come on, you have only been with 1 guy since you were 15, you don't agree with his favourite "hobby" (can't say I blame you) and you want to ban him from his own home?

You are way too young to settle and live this miserable life, it's never going to end well.

Get your own place, or with friends, date, and don't settle with a gambler at 19!
You have at least a good 10 years to have fun and not even think about settling.

He’s got a gambling problem. This will affect you forever if you stay with him.

You don't like gambling, he's a gambler.

Him sleeping elsewhere isn't going to solve your issue is it? Why are you continuing a relationship with someone so completely incompatible with you?

If the alternative was that he didn't like you going out late and banned you from coming back to your shared home afterwards, he'd be called controlling and abusive, and rightly so.
You are trying to control his behaviour by making it awkward for him if he goes.

I agree with others that id cut my losses and break up with someone who was showing signs of having a gambling problem. Trying to ban him from coming home from the night out isn't the way to deal with this.

A relationship with an addict is a guarantee of misery and heartbreak ahead.

That's the elephant in the room OP

If it's "our place" in the sense you both live there and both pay for it, then yes this is controlling. Imagine you got a hobby he wasn't keen on and he banned you from coming home at night?

But if he's into gambling and you don't approve don't set yourself up for a lifetime of misery by staying working your are incompatible with.

You’re both very young and I think you’re setting yourself up for a lifetime of disappointment and stress if you commit to a committed gambler. It will always be life on a financial knife edge. It’s an addiction.

I think you need to reconsider whether you are compatible as a couple. You are still young and finding yourself, as is he.

You cannot unilaterally impose rules on the comings and goings of someone from their own home where they pay bills. It can only be by agreement.

But I agree with pp. This isn’t working for you. You need to split up.