AIBU??? WhatsApp chat drama!

I doubt the op will return to the thread, it’s not really gone how she wanted it to. Unless of course somehow a major event has occurred since half eight this morning, even if it’s a product of her fertile imagination 🙄

I would probably move... it's the only sensible non-dramaz thing to do.
Australia.

So these four women actually get off their arses to organise stuff and even invite others to join in, but your friend expects them to run around after everyone to ensure no-one is left out?

Seriously??

Why should they? They’re not being paid to be your personal social secretary?

You and/or your friend could organise your own outings with the other parents via the WhatsApp group, if you wanted to. So why don’t you?

🤣👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

Please don’t.

Cross posted! 😆

This is insane. Absolutely bat shit crazy.

Please just relax and go about your business as normal. Be pleasant, be friendly and then go back to your life in between school runs.

Oh come on, thats utter nonsense. In the nicest way possible, you sound a bit crazy. Forget it and move on.

None of this stuff matters. Drop your kids off, pick them up, be polite. Who the fuck cares?

Can't wait for the 3.30 update.

Sounds like you got in your own head about it

Yup, I realise that and it makes me sad. The irony is that the thought of being disliked fills me with dread. But, hey ho.

I hate to break it to you but, if you're a self-confessed control freak and organiser and 'like to be involved', people will be saying stuff like that about you!

You sound disappointed?? what did you want a fight?

I’ve experienced the same scenarios with school mums and WhatsApp groups and I’ve now decided to keep these mums at a healthy arms length. I don’t follow on social media or respond to these messages as you can drive yourself mad. I keep them friendly enough for pleasantries at school but don’t engage any further than that. I’m pretty sure some of them enjoy being cliquey and exclusive and love to let others know they had a good night out so disconnecting and focussing on your real friends outside the school bubble is your best bet.

There are two sides to this as I tend to agree that cliquey behaviour is awful, however, it's tricky to book and socialise at a meal for 30 parents. 12 is a good number so unsurprising they've not pushed harder for numbers/inclusion.
I feel for your friend as she was interested and it looks like she's been excluded but at this point you don't know if this was a genuine oversight. You can organise drinks between the two of you or invite those you like, it's not treading on toes to also organise things.

The people I chat to in DDs year are mostly the parents of her friends (who I'd ask directly about park trips/playdates) and a few others who I know through other people but our kids aren't close. I'd assume that anything like Y6 leavers would be arranged partly in conjunction with the kids at that age anyway so I wouldn't worry too much about it

This is a horrible take. You have no idea if these women are bitches or not. I'm a natural organiser and enjoy being involved (aka, a bit of a control freak) so tend to be in the middle of things. I'd hate it if someone assumed I was some sort of Regina George because of it.
You've heard one side of things. Remember, there's likely to be 3 sides: OPs side of things, the organisers, and what actually happened.

Please don't assume people are bitches though, before you've even met or spoken to them, that's awful.

I don't think they will think you and the other woman are in cahoots. It never occurred to me until you spelt it out. You knew about the event but didn't want to go; your friend asked about it and possibly was left out deliberately or else nobody bothered to reply. If there is any tension going on it shouldn't affect you.

Why does anyone want to get involved with group of Karens?!!! My idea of torture TBH!

Don't bother updating us as it's a complete non event. This is obviously much to your disappointment.

Updated on what? Literally nothing involving you happened. Nothing happened.

I think you need to consider why you are so afraid of conflict and of other people.

You sound nice, but you surely don’t want to be a pushover in order to keep in with people who behave badly. Just behave well yourself and let everyone else get on with their silly fusses.

This is high school level drama.

Op you care way too much about what these women may or may not think if you're even considering throwing your actual friend under the bus to align yourself with them.

If they've started inviting people and then snubbed people then actually those people are entitled to call that out should they so choose. That's nothing to do with you and I wouldn't be getting involved in any way. You were invited, you didn't want to go so just leave yourself right out of it.

If they think you're part of the frustration about it then that's on them, they can either address that with you like adults and you can set them straight and say you were invited but couldn't make it and it's nothing to do with you, or they choose to be underhanded and talk about you in secret in which case let them jog on.

You do have a choice in how much you let this bother you.

It had been mentioned in the playground that week but I wasn't really interested.

So, the people who WERE interested went. Okay.

Didn’t want to go, didn’t go, don’t care who went…don’t see the problem?? I was always added to class WhatsApp groups and I rarely commented if at all. I socialised with the parents whose kids my kids liked, I arranged personal thank you gifts for teachers, I arranged parties the old fashioned way with paper invites given out…I muted the WhatsApp groups because I had more important things to focus on than adult playground politics of my child is better than yours! My best trick was leaving these groups when some got silly (like for things that you’ve posted about!) and having the satisfaction that it showed up as ‘my name’ has left the group! 😆 if that isn’t the biggest two fingers up at the ones causing drama than I don’t know