Should I just put my money directly in the bin?

106 replies

ThedaBara · 23/11/2025 09:45

My daughter has mild SEN, goes to a mainstream school and is doing well.
Over the years she has managed to lose nearly every item of clothing i have provided her with for school - she came home wearing someone else's socks once and couldn't explain where hers had gone!

She's in year 6 now and her school are doing leavers hoodies. She's had hers a week and it's gone. I do have to buy her another one, everyone else in class wears theirs daily and she's very distressed at being the only one without one. She's offered for it to come out of her savings, which i won't do, but it shows that she understands that all these things cost money.

What can i do to improve this situation? She'll be going to secondary next year and I can't buy her a new blazer for every day of the year!

Grateful for any tips from parents with SEN, or butter fingered children!

OP posts:

LoveSandbanks · 23/11/2025 09:53

I was so glad when my ds1 went to a special school for secondary. I machine embroidered his surname on the back of his clothes in a matching thread. It was visible but subtle iygwim.

Then I found these

https://attachatag.com/?ppc_keyword=attach%20a%20tag&msclkid=975b94add05710e11385fd8f088f8c65&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Search%20-%20Brand&utm_term=attach%20a%20tag&utm_content=Brand%20-%20Core

They can be placed inside on a label or visible in a discreet place on the garment eg near the hem of a sweatshirt. Teachers actually commented how easy they were for them to find the owners.

Attach A Tag - Clothes Labelling Made Easy.

Fast and Easy to Apply Name Tags - Perfect for School Uniform, Care Home Residents Clothing and more. Permanent, Dignified and Reusable.

https://attachatag.com/?msclkid=975b94add05710e11385fd8f088f8c65&ppc_keyword=attach+a+tag

toomuchfaff · 23/11/2025 09:53

I dont have air tag, but seen an article this morning mentioning one. Can you air tag things so uou can track them?

TheNightingalesStarling · 23/11/2025 09:51

Firstly... are you 100% sure she's losing things not someone hiding them?

Secondary school... the easiest place to lose things is the PE changing room. Start training her to place everything except blazer and shoes inside the bag. Especially the Tie. Write her name on the reverse of the tie in Perm Marker.

Mark the bag clearly with her name on the outside.

bluedabadeedabadoo · 23/11/2025 09:51

What helped slightly at this age for my son was for me to name everything and for him to have a checklist attached to his bag. At the end of the day the teacher would remind him to check his list. He also had a basket underneath his desk to put his stuff. That won’t help for secondary but could try and get her into better habits. However my son is now 14 and loses stuff all the time and I’m yet to find a solution for secondary school.

CryMyEyesViolet · 23/11/2025 09:49

Where has she lost it and how much effort are you putting into finding it?

I don’t know how her SEN manifests, but is she feeling natural consequences of leaving things (having to spend time looking for them, missing what she wants to do to go shopping, money from her savings, going without) - as those are the reasons most people try not to lose things. Obviously SEN might make this harder for her, but that’s not true for all SEN people.

I think teaching her mechanisms to help her stop losing things. Every time she stands up to and moves away, make her check if anything is left behind. My mum has done this with us since we could walk (and she does it herself noticeably every time she stands up) and even my very ADHD sister rarely loses things as it’s second nature to look back at what you’re leaving behind.

But I can’t believe this hoody isn’t findable! Either someone has two, or it’s in lost property…

bigboykitty · 23/11/2025 09:47

Are you marking her clothing, with sew or iron-in labels and indelible ink on the tags? Is your DD a soft target for anyone who has lost their own clothing?

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