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AIBU?

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AIBU Changing rooms

29 replies

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 20:48

AIBU to think that changing cubicles should be first come first served?

There seems to be a growing number of inconsiderate and entitled individuals at our local leisure centre who think the changing room rules don’t apply to them when there are swimming lessons on. From wearing outside, even muddy shoes into the charging areas despite numerous signs to remove outdoor footwear to plonking belongings into cubicles to “reserve” them before they’re actually needed.

For context, I’ve been taking my children to lessons at a few different swimming schools consistently over the last 10 years and I’ve never experienced the sort of entitlement I’ve seen at the new pool.

We’ve recently moved long distance and the “locals” all seem friendly, helpful and welcoming…until you get to the leisure centre. There are usually 4-5 different lessons swimming at the same time and there aren’t enough changing cubicles for everyone coming out of lessons to change at the same time. But this isn’t necessarily a problem because there are 10 changing cubicles and only 6 showers. So usually while the second lot finish showering and need to change the first lot are getting done and there’s generally not much more than a minute or two to wait for a cubicle. swimmers are ages 3-12 years old at the times we attend. However, there are a number of parents who put their kids bags in the cubicles BEFORE getting their kids from the instructor and showered. It doesn’t matter whether there little darlings are first out or last out, they “reserve” cubicles regardless of whether anyone else is already ready to change and needs one or not. I find this extremely rude, inconsiderate and entitled. I’m so fed up of it. I just can’t understand the mentality. What would you do?

OP posts:
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YodasHairyButt · 24/11/2025 07:19

Yes but sadly some people are just arseholes and that’s a lesson our kids learn too. They’ll have to deal with them their whole lives.

LittleMsNobody · 23/11/2025 19:41

Thanks for all the responses. The aggression and abuse that gets given out but those entitled individuals when their reserved cubicles are used because no one was in them just takes the cake. It makes my blood boil, I just have to stay quiet or I know I’ll explode.

I honestly find it so disheartening that there are so many rude and selfish people about. I’m a firm believer in kindness first, always. You just never know what someone else is going through and that one positive (OR negative) interaction in a person’s day really can make a difference. I always teach my kids to be kind and considerate, teach that no one is more or less deserving than another. So it’s just so upsetting to me when people act with such entitlement and then become rude and aggressive if anyone “dares” infringe on it.

It seems to me to be especially prevalent around school and child related things whether it’s inconsiderate (sometimes even illegal) parking school runs, cubicle hogs at swimming lessons, line jumping at school events. Like surely these occasions are opportunities to teach our children through showing them what being a good human being looks like?

I appreciate I’m probably over sensitive to some of these things and get caught overthinking them too, but thanks again for all the responses!

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LilacPony · 23/11/2025 08:36

I would go in and use the cubicle. When they come looking I would say “are you looking for your bag? We found it here.” As if they mislaid it.

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 23/11/2025 08:32

His is what swim towel hoodies are for in my experience. Just put one over the head straight after the lesson. Whip the trunks or costume off underneath. Flip flops in the feet and away from the whole area immediately. We would just wrap the child up in the towel and sit in a whole other area. Then it was just a case of sticking a onesie on and out to the car - sort it out at home.

Santasbigredbobblehat · 23/11/2025 08:25

Take them out whilst the parents are getting the kids from the pool. If you were being nice you could leave them somewhere visible or you could put them in a handy empty locker.
Then stand back and watch whilst they look for their stuff.
I’m only suggesting this because they sound like horrible aggressive people.
I think you should speak to management about it.

LittleMsNobody · 23/11/2025 08:15

ShesTheAlbatross · 22/11/2025 22:52

To be honest, if there are no other benches I can see why people put the bag in the cubicle on the bench in there. Otherwise there’s nowhere dry to put the child’s clothes while they shower them. I totally get why it’s annoying though, it just doesn’t sound like a great set up.

There are plenty of lockers so things can be kept dry and wouldn’t need to be left on the floor for any reason

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Glassfullofdreams · 23/11/2025 07:10

This happens at our leisure centre. On one particular occasion, someone had 'reserved' the only family cubicle in the whole place. In frustration, I pushed all of his stuff to one side and went it with my own children. Five minutes later a man was banging on the door telling me to get out and that he'd only left the changing room for 30 seconds. I opened the door and politely told him where to go, shut the door again and carried getting my children ready, while listening to his abuse through the door!

monkeysox · 23/11/2025 07:01

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:46

I’m really considering it. I’m physically quite unwell and mentally at rock bottom already, so having to deal with the added stress around swimming is just becoming unbearable

Ask to use the disabled facilities? X

verycloakanddaggers · 23/11/2025 06:46

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:46

I’m really considering it. I’m physically quite unwell and mentally at rock bottom already, so having to deal with the added stress around swimming is just becoming unbearable

Definitely try a different pool if you can, but maybe don't switch until you know if it's better.

Also you could send a polite, general complaint to the pool.

I find this extremely rude, inconsiderate and entitled. I’m so fed up of it. I just can’t understand the mentality. What would you do? It helps to be realistic about people. Some people are rude, some are just oblivious. It has never really been any different. I personally do understand the mentality even though I disagree with it. Acceptance of reality helps reduce stress on you as an observer.

Something you could do when you see bad behaviour is take pride that you are polite and considerate and are trying to raise your own kids the right way.

GehenSieweiter · 23/11/2025 06:34

YodasHairyButt · 22/11/2025 20:51

Take their stuff out and use the cubicle

This. It's beyond selfish to do this at busy times.
Also tell the staff what's happening - our pool puts signs up and some lifeguards do ask folk to move their belongings. Of course, the sign says to put stuff in lockers, and some idiots people seem to call the changing cubicles lockers. 🫣

Zanatdy · 23/11/2025 06:31

Yeah just use it. Let them knock on the door and tell you there stuff is in it. Then i’d politely say that your kids were soaking wet and needed drying so can’t sit there shivering when a cubicle is not being used. Also i’d ask the leisure centre to send out an email to parents asking them not to reserve cubicles before their children are showered. Some people are so self centred.

Bumbers · 23/11/2025 06:26

Use the cubicle with their stuff in. Shove it to the side and then use as normal

OSTMusTisNT · 22/11/2025 23:00

Politely complain to the manager and ask that the changing area is monitored by staff during lesson time. Maybe also mention safeguarding the kids as some children are being forced to get changed in the communal area at the hairdryers due to all changing rooms being used as a bag store.

Used to happen in our pool, us adults coming in for a fitness class couldn't get changed as literally every cubicle was being blocked by the kids who were in for swimming lessons before us. We complained, a few posters went up and a member of staff had to hang around the changing rooms to explain it to the parents who couldn't read...

Sparklesandspandexgallore · 22/11/2025 22:57

That’s not on.
Dh and I often go away to a regular place and use a leisure centre whilst there. There are plenty of lockers in which to put your clothes etc. yet there are always clothes left in Changing cubicles. There are not many changing cubicles either. I just don’t understand why anyone does this.

InfoSecInTheCity · 22/11/2025 22:53

When DD did swimming lessons it was like this, the first few times I asked the swim teacher if she was able to do anything and I waited (impatiently) for a cubicle to come free. Once I knew everyone had been clearly told on several occasions that they shouldn’t reserve the cubicles I started just moving stuff to an empty locker and telling the teacher where it was in case anyone asked.

ShesTheAlbatross · 22/11/2025 22:52

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:38

Youngest DC is 4. There are no benches other than those the the cubicles. Some people resort to using the chest high ledge/shelf by the hair dryers, but unfortunately due to physical limitations I’m unable to lift DC at all. I can support them getting on a bench, but no way to get them up on anything higher. So without a cubicle I’d have to get down on my knees on the wet, dirty floor to get them changed

Edited

To be honest, if there are no other benches I can see why people put the bag in the cubicle on the bench in there. Otherwise there’s nowhere dry to put the child’s clothes while they shower them. I totally get why it’s annoying though, it just doesn’t sound like a great set up.

MeouwKing · 22/11/2025 22:51

I went swimming Thursday and there were 3 lads playing Roblox in a cubicle. I just don't get modern life any more.

ThreeSixtyTwo · 22/11/2025 22:50

Could you just use the cubicle with the things in it?

"Oh, I thought someone forgot it here."

PollyBell · 22/11/2025 22:48

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:46

I’m really considering it. I’m physically quite unwell and mentally at rock bottom already, so having to deal with the added stress around swimming is just becoming unbearable

There is a changing room with no people in it so use it, why are you deliberately making things more difficult than you have too

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:46

PurpleCyclamen · 22/11/2025 21:13

This is so inconsiderate of them. It’s not new. It happened when my kids were having swimming lessons 10 years ago. I found a new pool.

I’m really considering it. I’m physically quite unwell and mentally at rock bottom already, so having to deal with the added stress around swimming is just becoming unbearable

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PollyBell · 22/11/2025 22:44

If their stuff is in there is doesn't stop me using them why would it? If I have to move it i do

LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:42

YodasHairyButt · 22/11/2025 20:51

Take their stuff out and use the cubicle

The parents reserving them are so rude and confrontational if anyone dares infringe on their entitlement

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LittleMsNobody · 22/11/2025 22:38

BlueMum16 · 22/11/2025 20:51

How old is your DC? Is there no bench area you can use?

Youngest DC is 4. There are no benches other than those the the cubicles. Some people resort to using the chest high ledge/shelf by the hair dryers, but unfortunately due to physical limitations I’m unable to lift DC at all. I can support them getting on a bench, but no way to get them up on anything higher. So without a cubicle I’d have to get down on my knees on the wet, dirty floor to get them changed

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PurpleCyclamen · 22/11/2025 21:13

This is so inconsiderate of them. It’s not new. It happened when my kids were having swimming lessons 10 years ago. I found a new pool.

GreyCarpet · 22/11/2025 21:05

Put their stuff outside the cubicle then.