To ask you what is the worst thing your MIL has done or said to you?

God that’s awful 😢

Nowhere near as bad as yours but mine had me photoshopped out of my own wedding photos as she wanted photos of ‘just their family’

A couple of weeks after the birth of my first baby (which nearly killed me as I lost 3 litres of blood and needed loads of transfusions and was left with ptsd and awful birth injuries) she put on a baby voice pretended to be my baby and said ‘I need a brother or sister I’m feeling lonely!!’

Funnily enough we aren’t close.

That’s awful!
My MIL sat me down when my first DC was 3 months old and told me he would be autistic so I needed to be aware of the signs. But when I got my DH and asked her to also tell him she tried to deny she’d said it. So it was very clear she was being nasty rather than helpful. Which was an eye opener for DH (not for me as she had form for saying nasty stuff to me out of his earshot).
The worst bit though was that my DM had died less than a month before (from a cancer diagnosed the week I found out I was pregnant).

Saying loudly in DS1's hearing when I was pregnant with DC2 "Tom is going to be so upset when the baby is born, just like his Dad was when Laura (SIL) was born."
Fuck off MiL.
In fact as it happened, Tom loved his baby sibling and they are still close 20 years later.
Fortunately, as you can see, although I don't like the woman, if that's the worst thing she's done, our relationship is OK compared to all the other horror stories being told.

Discussing my son’s latest appointment for one of his disabilities. She proceeded to say “do you think if you had breastfed for longer he would have all these problems?”
another corker, I was petting the family dog and said “my goodness your getting chunky or is that your winter coat?”
MIL looked me up and down and said “pot and kettle black”
I was 5 months pregnant.

needless to say I haven’t spoken to her in over a year because every time I seen her she would spill her venom and I refuse to have that around our children

My mil has behaved poorly for years totally enabled by my husband who has been conditioned not to set boundaries. She really is dreadful.

My mil said we were cursed because the child was born with a cleft palate...urg

Mine didn’t like the wedding venue we had chosen and booked, so she rang and booked somewhere else instead! She wasn’t paying a penny towards it. We had our choice. Said if we didn’t have a catholic church wedding she wouldn’t come, I was only 21 and I caved, can’t believe I did that! There was lots, she is deceased now so don’t want to speak ill of the dead but she was awful.

I'm a MIL. It's a bit like being the wicked stepmother in Snow White. At least on mumsnet where the MILs who help out with house deposits, provide free child care and are generally both happy and welcoming don't seem to exist. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could hear the other side of these stories?
OP, your husband's loyalty is to you. Your MIL made a cruel and clumsy remark and someone (your hubby) needs to explain that to her. Hopefully she will have the sense to make a meaningful apology.
Most of these issues do not need to descend into World War III. In all but the most horrendous cases, a quiet word and an apology will lay it to rest. I have heard of some MILs I wouldn't want to be in the same room with - and also some DILs. We're not ogres. Most of us dearly wish to see our sons make a success of their marriage. Give us a break, yes?

Sounds like she dud you a favour not speaking to you for a year. Id have told her to fuck off when she did try speaking to me again

That is disgraceful. A really awful thing to say.

Also as a mum of 2 sons they are amazing. The might of my life.

Im sure daughters are great too but I really don’t think it matters what you have. As a grandmother you should just be grateful to have a healthy grandchild. It’s not important whether it’s a boy or a girl.

My one sounds really petty in comparison (it is) but this has annoyed me this week.
My partners mum has always said she would like us to be closer and she would like to see more of me (I’m at work a lot as I have a very demanding job).

My mum died just over a week ago and she said sorry to hear that is there anything g practical I can do?

She then sent me a really long random message that was general chit chat about her own mum. Really odd because if someone’s dog has just died I wouldn’t immediately send them a message about how great my dog was. So I thought I would give her a task to do to distract her from the odd messages so I asked her if she would mind dropping a me off for my 16 year old on one of the days I was visiting my 18 year old to make sure he was ok after the death of his gran. She said no and I haven’t heard from her since.

I just found it really odd. Why offer to help but not want to help. If someone’s just lost their mum you don’t talk about how great your own mum is immediately. I know people will talk about their mums and that’s fine it was just the odd timing of it.

So now I am just going to back off and basically never contact her again. I will be polite if I see her but I will make no effort.

It is her loss as I won’t be offering to help her in the future if she needs help. I’m surrounded by people at the moment who are being lovely to me about my mum. She hasn’t got any friends which is telling. She is much more likely to need a favour from me in the future than I am to need one. I wouldn’t ask again if my life depended on it.

My mil took the approach of death by 1000 cuts. A couple of outstanding memories - telling me I needed to lose weight 12 hours after I had had my daughter by c section and loudly criticising the wedding venue during our wedding. The registrar also had to ask her to be quiet as she was talking through the ceremony.

We are nc with her now, should have done it years before we did. Don't be me!!

That’s gross OP! Congrats on your pregnancy (or child, if this was a while ago!).

MIL is fine but FIL is a vile piece of work. Too many things to list but asked DH to choose him or me 😂 obviously DH ‘chose’ his wife and mother of his children but there wasn’t really any active choice to make hence FIL throwing a strop and asking this in the first place.

That was 7 years ago and FIL still is in this 6-monthly cycle of sending loads of vile abuse, then ‘cutting us off forever and writing us out of the will’ (who cares?!) and going silent for 6 months (thank god), rinse and repeat 6 months later. Like clockwork. Last time was this week, I said to DH a couple of days before, ‘your dad will be in touch soon’. So boring and very draining and really sad for DH. I haven’t spoken to FIL in years, DH only in touch via text because the situation is complicated with his mum. Life isn’t black and white but we’re as NC as possible given we’re complex humans with hearts.

High risk pregnancy, premature baby whisked off at birth to neonatal etc came to visit after a trip to a tropical country with fever and D&V. Wouldn’t let her into hospital to see baby obviously.

Said we’d ruined her experience of becoming a grandmother and didn’t speak to us for over a year.

so many offensive comments
a couple I can think of:
why don’t you sell your wedding dress (it was in storage at their (v large ) house? It’s not like you’ll wear it again even if you re marry ?
(With her son then and I still am !!)

or
(after getting my inheritance after loosing both my parents within 18 months of each other )
’don’t spend it all - you’ll only get one inheritance’
😳😳😳

That mil sounds awful too tbf
She gave numerous other examples not just about flowers..

Wow, that's awful.

Meanwhile on another thread a poster is moaning about MIL not liking the flowers for her wedding!!!

and you hung up. Haven't spoken to her since and you OH has released holy hell (in private).

Stay away from that, let him deal with his mother. You stay far away

Congratulations on your pregnancy OP.