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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not really get why people don’t like clothes?

489 replies

keeponwishing · 21/11/2025 18:04

I’m not talking about specifically liking fashion or following certain trends.

I mean in general, clothes are a personal choice. They can express who you are, there’s do much choice out there. Why people say they don’t care what they wear?

OP posts:
butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 20:44

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 20:40

But people who care about style often make better choices. I still wear dresses from 20 or more years ago. I've never fallen for fast fashion and I buy things to last. I'd rather spend on one decent dress from Toast that will last me years than grab 10 items from Primark that will have no longevity.

But that's also a privileged position to be in - as not everyone can afford to save up for a better quality item. If you have one pair of trainers and they've fallen apart, and you have £20 - then you have no choice but to pay a pair of £20 trainers. You can't wait until you can afford the £90 pair.

It's the Boots Theory again.

Wot23 · 22/11/2025 20:42

clothes have 3 functions:

  1. to preserve modesty
  2. to instil self confidence because you feel "good" in them
  3. to attract or please a mate because you look sexy (see 2 above)
AutumnClouds · 22/11/2025 20:42

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 20:36

Is it really? Never anything more?
If it's just comfort, then why would we ever take off our pyjamas?

There are whole Daily Mail articles and mumsnet threads complaining that some people don’t!

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 20:40

Gingernaut · 22/11/2025 20:35

There is enough clothing to clothe the world six times over and most of it is shitty, microplastic shedding, fast fashion

By all means express yourself, but stop buying new every time

But people who care about style often make better choices. I still wear dresses from 20 or more years ago. I've never fallen for fast fashion and I buy things to last. I'd rather spend on one decent dress from Toast that will last me years than grab 10 items from Primark that will have no longevity.

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 20:39

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 20:36

Is it really? Never anything more?
If it's just comfort, then why would we ever take off our pyjamas?

I don't wear pyjamas Wink

And I don't think it would go down very well if I turned up to walk people's dogs in nothing but an oversized t-shirt - not very practical either!

So yes, comfort for me is the priority, and that includes practicality - what's comfortable at home is different to what's tolerable and comfortable at work.

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 20:36

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:58

Im just interested in why people wear what they wear.

Comfort. That's it.

Is it really? Never anything more?
If it's just comfort, then why would we ever take off our pyjamas?

Gingernaut · 22/11/2025 20:35

keeponwishing · 21/11/2025 18:04

I’m not talking about specifically liking fashion or following certain trends.

I mean in general, clothes are a personal choice. They can express who you are, there’s do much choice out there. Why people say they don’t care what they wear?

There is enough clothing to clothe the world six times over and most of it is shitty, microplastic shedding, fast fashion

By all means express yourself, but stop buying new every time

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 20:31

Waitingfordoggo · 22/11/2025 20:30

@henlake7 I don’t think it’s difficult to understand. The question was about people’s criteria for selecting clothes. For some, the answer is ‘comfort’ while others will say ‘comfort AND style’.

Yes it is possible to care about comfort and style equally, but not everyone does- it’s as simple as that.

Yes, exactly.

For me, shopping for style as well as comfort would be too stressful and limiting to be worth it, so I go for the most important thing - comfort.

Waitingfordoggo · 22/11/2025 20:30

@henlake7 I don’t think it’s difficult to understand. The question was about people’s criteria for selecting clothes. For some, the answer is ‘comfort’ while others will say ‘comfort AND style’.

Yes it is possible to care about comfort and style equally, but not everyone does- it’s as simple as that.

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 20:25

henlake7 · 22/11/2025 20:19

I'm not sure why comfort means that you don't care what your clothes look like though.
I care what I look like and enjoy dressing up ( at least my version of it!). However I wouldn't pick anything to wear that wasn't comfy. All my clothes are picked for style and comfort.
I have too many memories of being a teenager and lying on the bed to get my jeans done up.....im not going there again!LOL

Edited

Because due to my autism, I have so many sensory issues that finding clothes that are both stylish and tolerable to wear for long periods is like finding a needle in haystack, and I honestly don't have the energy to bother lol.

If I can find something that's comfortable and that I can tolerate on my skin all day without wanting to have a meltdown, I've already hit the jackpot and will buy about ten of them. What they look like just doesn't matter at that point.

henlake7 · 22/11/2025 20:19

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:58

Im just interested in why people wear what they wear.

Comfort. That's it.

I'm not sure why comfort means that you don't care what your clothes look like though.
I care what I look like and enjoy dressing up ( at least my version of it!). However I wouldn't pick anything to wear that wasn't comfy. All my clothes are picked for style and comfort.
I have too many memories of being a teenager and lying on the bed to get my jeans done up.....im not going there again!LOL

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 20:14

NotOvertheWorstofit · 22/11/2025 20:12

This exactly!

People dressing identically to express their individuality has always cracked me up

NotOvertheWorstofit · 22/11/2025 20:12

Elsvieta · 21/11/2025 18:32

Always a bit baffled by the idea of "expressing who you are" through mass-produced objects, designed and manufactured by someone else. Better to express who you are with your own words and actions, I reckon. And wanting to express anything in particular to every stranger who glances you seems a bit self-involved.

This exactly!

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 20:11

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 20:09

Its just so nice when you find something that feels comfy, it makes sense to buy as many as possible.

Definitely. My big fear is a favourite item being discontinued, so I always have a spare pack/item on hand in case that happens, so I have time to find myself a suitable replacement.

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 20:09

Its just so nice when you find something that feels comfy, it makes sense to buy as many as possible.

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 20:07

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 20:02

Haha same here! So many duplicates.

I'm glad it's not just me Grin

Currently wearing a jumper I own in three different colours, a t-shirt I have in five (?) different designs, and my staple black leggings, and socks in a style my mum got me for Christmas years ago and that I now buy on semi-annual basis to make sure I never end up without any!

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 20:02

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:57

Yeah, I basically know what I can tolerate so I just keep buying the same things over and over.

I have 8-10 pairs of the same black leggings, for example Grin

Haha same here! So many duplicates.

LittleCapybara · 22/11/2025 20:02

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 22/11/2025 19:23

I agree with buying for comfort!! Absolutely!

But there are people on here saying they hate fashion/clothes and are not interested. But even they are conforming to the expected societal norm of what’s currently acceptable.

Well yes, because they buy what is readily available at the time. They’d have to put a lot of work into finding an 80’s puff sleeve blouse, and if they don’t care what they wear then why would they go to that effort?
Honestly this is such a bizarre argument to make.

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:58

Im just interested in why people wear what they wear.

Comfort. That's it.

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:57

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 19:54

Im a heffer so I shop online at Yours.

My keyword is Jersey cos thats the fabric thats comfy and I sort by lowest price.

If its under 20 quid into the basket it goes

Yeah, I basically know what I can tolerate so I just keep buying the same things over and over.

I have 8-10 pairs of the same black leggings, for example Grin

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:54

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 19:48

I don't go in shops at all because I have social anxiety. I only buy online.

I agree about snug armpits. I also can't wear high necks because they make me panic. Cannot bear anything touching my throat.

I don't like baggy sleeves either but I do like wide trousers; cannot bear tapered or narrow ankles, hate feeling stuff against my calves. I sometimes wear jeans for walking the dog but I can't sit in the house in them because I hate how they feel, so I have to get changed when we get back.

Don't like shoes, can only wear boots, even in summer. Also hate bras because of the underbands and can only wear soft crop tops meant for teens.

So my wardrobe is very samey with a lot of long loose linen dresses, long sleeved cotton t-shirts and lace up boots.

Yeah, mine is incredibly same-y too.

It basically consists of lots of black leggings (some fleece lined for winter, but all the same brand and style), t-shirts (again, all the same style/fit but different colours and designs), jumpers (four fits, but in different colours) and hoodies.

All my socks are the same, my bras are the same (no wires, only crop-top style) and so are my knickers. Shoes are either converse-style, trainers or boots, or flats. I can't wear heels of any kind, or sandals.

I can vary what I wear depending on the seasons but ultimately I always wear the same thing.

QueenClinomania · 22/11/2025 19:54

butterycroissants · 22/11/2025 19:29

Honestly, it's bizarre lol.

I buy whatever I can find on Amazon or from George at ASDA. Because as long as it's affordable and comfortable, that's all that matters.

Im a heffer so I shop online at Yours.

My keyword is Jersey cos thats the fabric thats comfy and I sort by lowest price.

If its under 20 quid into the basket it goes

Staringintothevoid616 · 22/11/2025 19:53

99% of the time I’m in band shirts and jeans.. now it’s cold I wear band hoodies - special occasions I’ll wear a dress.

I guess what do you count as “not caring” I very much care about my bands shirts.

CoubousAndTourmaIet · 22/11/2025 19:53

@AutumnClouds
I suppose I'm on the fence. I love clothes but I'm not a slave to fashion or labels.
I would notice if someone looked nice or had a strong sense of style but it wouldn't be from the perspective of how expensive their footwear or what brand their coat was. That would be meaningless to me.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 22/11/2025 19:52

AutumnClouds · 22/11/2025 19:48

I don’t think there’s any contradiction there - people aren’t interested so they but what’s readily available, comfortable and doesn’t require much thought.

I’m vaguely pleased that wider leg trousers are fashionable again, because I never enjoyed the restrictiveness of skinny jeans or the gap between them and my shoes, so now it’s easier to buy comfortable affordable trousers that I like to wear without any great effort. I’m aware that skinny jeans and wide leg jeans are different fashions and that some people enjoy thinking about that. I genuinely have no interest in what opinions anyone will form about me based on which I wear.

I would not feel differently about anyone else based on which they wear. I’ve recently made two new friends, one is always very well put together and happens to be very pretty but I couldn’t tell you what type of things she wears or if it’s fashionable, the other is more casual and I think wears the leggings and a baggy tshirt uniform but I couldn’t swear on it. The things that I like about each of them have nothing to do with any of that and my early impressions were based on how they smiled and what we talked about not how expensive their footwear or what brand their coat.

Why does that seem incomprehensible to some people on this thread? I believe you that you notice what people wear and care what they think of what you wear, but why is it impossible to believe that isn’t a universal experience?

I never said that. Some people are interested, some aren’t.

Im just interested in why people wear what they wear.

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