To think being a woman costs more?

Speaking as a man, I would say that in general and in the context of most societal expectations, being a woman is more expensive. How much more expensive probably depends on specific details and what choices each person makes.

Bikini waxes never had one, never going to
hairdressers I go about twice a year. Probably ends up about the same cost annually as DH
tights worn occassionally. Might buy about 3 pairs a year. Hardly a significant expense
lingerie my pants are no more expensive than DH's. Bras are an extra yes but I buy about a pack of three every few years. Again, hardly a significant expense
taxis after dark… Maybe. But where I live both of us are either driving ourselves or in a taxi because nowhere to go out is walkable. Even when we were inner city I don't think I'd have been out anywhere that often than needed a taxi.

But then we've never made any assessment of what either spends. It all just comes out of the joint account anyway

Bikini waxes, hairdressers, tights, lingerie, taxis after dark…

None of those are mandatory. Possibly the taxi if your area is extremely unsafe or no public transport options.

For those saying hairdresser, you can learn to cut your own hair very well.

Period supplies. Bras. Post Partum care items. Those are necessities.

And what @takealettermsjones said about more medical tests because a lot of providers blow off women is true.

Men have all the expense of going to football games and drinking lots of beer.

Sanitary products, paying for kids when husband ditches them, paying for expenses and loss of earning from pregnancy and having young kids- these are the real expenses connected to being a woman, as far as I can see.

I have never done any of the things on your list, nor do I use makeup or skincare.

The point many many posters have made is that you are choosing to toe the line to social pressure. "My colleagues style their hair so I have to as well." It's fine if you want to do these things but they are definitely luxuries.

I worked in a professional job pre kids, and I cut my longish hair once a year (£25 for a quick dry cut) and because it's not a 'style' I just tie it up everyday. It looks plenty professional enough. I've never had a bikini wax, or nails or anything like that. I wear mascara about ten times a year. And yet I am absolutely happy with life, my husband fancies me, and nobody at work ever judged me or refused me a promotion because they weren't misogynists. I really recommend breaking free.

I'm not sure OP. I've never had a bikini wax. Women's hair appointments for highlights, cuts are more expensive but mens underwear is not free and men also use taxis after dark.
I suppose it depends on how much you spend on unnecessary things like make up (things that are considered stereotypically female) etc
Imo it's probably even between the sexes.

Yes of course it does. I'm not one for fancy cosmetics or any of the other stuff I would consider optional. No bikini waxes, expensive salons for me.
BUT. I have a large bust and a decent bra is around £50 so times that by however many we need to buy in our lifetime. Without a decent bra I suffer terrible back pain. And then of course sanpro for several decades.

I clocked on to the fact that mens toiletries/razors etc are cheaper years ago and always buy mens toiletries. No pink tax for me, other than aforementioned bras and sanpro.

Maybe look outside of your own circle for hair.

waxing is your choice, don’t do it if you don’t want.

Your op would have been a decent discussion and you wouldn’t have been wrong had you not included waxing, haircuts and lingerie in it!

If this is around how much of the household income you both get for discretionary spending then you are BU as it should be the same assuming married etc and it's up to you how you spend your bit., but you don't get more.

I don't spend money on anything in your list, so no. I do occasionally wear a bra but I haven't bought a new one in years, and I wear tights for my ballet classes (but so do the men).

Thankfully I no longer need sanitary products, but I had washable pads when I did so not that expensive once I bought them

Equally, not all women do.

Sam Smith probably does.

Some do. 😄

Do men not also wear pants?

No. They’re not standard. Lingerie and bikini waxes are costs you are bearing to please your husband presumably? Many women cba either with that shit or with men who do ‘request’ it.

Not standard for everyone.

However I have spent approximately 32 years using sanitary products so I think that adds a fair few quid that my (male) DP hasn't spent!

Yes, it absolutely is. Pink tax and all that.

Plus men can get away with very small classic capsule wardrobes and still look good. Women do need more clothes and accessories to look good for all occasions. I know women can just wear white shirts and jeans but really who does that.

Women often get left with the children when a relationship breaks down, not every man 'mans up'...and kids are mega expensive, so yes, being a woman can definitely cost more.

Bikini wax - in no way standard, I'd never subject myself to that!

Hairdressers - everyone goes to the hairdressers. My partner goes more often than me. You also don't have to spend upwards of £60 every time.

Lingerie - completely optional.

Tights - not exactly bank breaking and men have socks.

Taxis after dark - when I lived in London I never bothered because the tube and buses were so much cheaper. Now I live rurally one of us always drives.

Discretionary spending is as expensive or cheap as you choose to make it...

None of them sound like much fun, no. You’d have a lot more money if you ditched them.

I mean, they’re really not. I’ve never had anything waxed. I used to shave at home now I’ve grown it all out. Hairdresser maybe once a year and I have a style I can easily trim myself in between. I don’t wear make up and live somewhere with good 24 hour public transport so I don’t use taxis very often

They absolutely are 'fun money'.

Bar taxis, which I can understand depending on where you live, and sanitary products which are obviously sex-specific, nothing you've mentioned is mandatory.

If you want to get your nails done / hair coloured / bikini waxed etc, then crack on, but it's not a fundamental part of the 'lived female experience'.