How do you stop yourself wanting all the things?

I sort of do this, especially with online purchases - put it in my basket and leave it there for a few days. If I still really want it then I'll buy it.
But also, I don't do tat. My mum used to buy ALL the tat, house was full of crap.

I allow myself one or two new Xmas decorations a year, usually something for the tree or a room decoration. I see it as a gradual collection that brings us joy each year.

What is it that makes you want them? I think that is what you need to address. You say you wish you were wealthy, so is the underlying wish for a higher paid job and if so how can you work towards that?

When my kids were little I did start buying things like Xmas PJ's but then realised it was ridiculous having these specific Xmas PJ's as they would only get worn for a few weeks (assuming they are given on 1st Dec). If you wanted to still do PJ's I would now approach it as winter PJ's that can be worn other times.
Having a special mug for Christmas should be the novelty itself, not getting a new one each year but the excitement of knowing it's Christmas because that mug comes out. Buy some different hot chocolate to try (lots of supermarkets are doing different flavours this year) and this can be the something new if that's what you crave.
Candles are just tat in my opinion so can't really comment on those. Jumpers I size up so they last at least two years, and I try and get something unisex so both my children can wear the item. Depending on how old your child is means that you will find that they don't want or even need that many festive items. When mine were little I loved having them wear Christmas clothes all through December but now they only wear anything christmassy on school Xmas jumper day and Christmas day!

We don't tend to go mad about Xmas, but when other half and I got together, every year we buy a couple of tree decorations. The rule is that they had to be a little whacky, amusing or reflective of the kind of year we've just had. We've quite the collection now, cats, robots, dinosaurs, spacemen, flying saucers, all sorts of stupidity. Even a cat one licking it's bum with a santa hat on which is my fav. Nice memories.

The rest of the stuff out there is just not needed or wanted. I already have nice crockery etc that comes out on special occasions, don't need or want xmas themed ones so I guess easy for us to not buy anything!

Genuine tips from a recovering over-spender: remember that all of this stuff will be in a landfill in a few years. Things that can feel so important now, you'll have forgotten about in a few months and thrown away. Then the cycle will repeat!

And remember that buying stuff means looking after it - do you have the space? Do you want to be dusting/cleaning it all the time? No one really wants to wash 10 blankets or clear dust off 20 candles

I'm massively materialistic - I attach a huge amount of value to 'stuff' and I don't know why. Not Christmas stuff as I don't like Christmas. But in general, yes, I 'want all the things' too.

My two biggest rules that help me:

1. I never buy anything new (except food, toiletries, underwear etc). Charity shops, Vintage shops/fairs, Vinted, Ebay, Facebook Marketplace, car boot sales and second hand markets only.

2. I never shop or look at things to buy online when I am feeling sad or stressed. Those emotions make me want to buy so much more stuff that I do not need.

Not sure why you’d want to buy Xmas tat, but just ignore the urge.

Waste of money. 🤷‍♀️

Sometimes if you buy one thing you adore, worked out by process of elimination- actually I wouldn’t really use that, that isn’t that nice up close etc etc, it scratches the itch! I’m materialistic at the mo and I don’t care- fed up of having the very bare minimum, never spending money etc!

I just buy it anyway 😬 I wish I had more self restraint but if I like it (and can afford it) I’ll buy it.

I just think "those things are for people with lots of storage space and we don't have much storage space in our average sized townhouse" and walk on.

I have the exact opposite reaction, in that shops full of stuff, especially seasonal stuff, make me feel like everything is all just hollow and empty, and think about the meaningless void of purpose in modern life. Not to be dramatic but if I bought that stuff it would just sit in my house and my life would carry on exactly as it would before. It genuinely gives me existential anxiety and dread.

I have three Christmas jumpers…….each one is in great condition and I’ve had them several years. They’re laundered carefully and put away for the following year so no need to buy more! Who needs a Christmas mug anyway? And just what is the point of Christmas pj’s, other than another marketing ploy to get us to spend our hard earned cash, or in some cases, the pittance of a pension that the DWP deem it possible to live on!
As for Christmas candles……….get a simply candle, stand it on a nice holder, decorate the base with some holly, pine cones etc - other decorations are available and Voila! Christmas candle!

I buy a couple of new things each year, I try to enjoy the ambience in shops and see the opulence as a seasonal thing for the shops rather than my home. If you bought everything you’d be drowning in clutter come January! 😄

If you are keeping PJs for twenty years you are clearly not buying a new pair each year, unless of course you have 25 pairs if PJs which would be rather excessive!

Its a shame we live in such a throwaway world. When my mum was a little girl she was given a China cup at Easter with a little chocolate egg in it. It was the only one she ever got so was really special to her. She died last year and the little mug has pride of place in my home, 90+ years after she received it. I am not suggesting that everything has to last that long, but wouldn't it be nicer if every year we take out our dcs special Christmas mug, or stocking, or cushion or whatever, and make a bit of a special event of it, and put them away again carefully afterwards, instead of buying more and more shit to send to landfill.

THIS !

I re-use until it is broken! Then, I may replace it if needed, or not if I don't.

For the past 2 years my kids and their cousins have all had matching Xmas PJs and the photos (of them) for my parents are nice but justifying the cost of those was hard for me !
The younger 4 grew, so re-using them was not an option either !

I guess different people prioritise spending on different stuff too don't they?

This is fantastic advice. The buying is nearly always for the dopamine hit.

I get it, it can seem tedious and boring to have the same old decorations and mugs year in year out and want a bit of a re-fresh. What we do instead is go to the Range or the garden centre and buy one new tree decoration a year. That way it’s special and creates a collection that can be handed down, and we also get the dopamine of buying something new for Christmas.

Instead of buying stuff, could you buy baking mixes/ingredient? Some air dry clay and acrylic paints? Some Christmas themed diamond paintings? That way you get to spend special time together, and then next year when you get the decorations you made out, they’ll feel more special than something mass produced that you just bought in a shop.

Do "one in, one out"

So sell and get rid of things BEFORE you buy new. That way you don't accumulate clutter, and if you can't sell you can't buy.

Don't add to a pile, replace.

What exactly are you planning on doing with a Christmas cushion from January?

I have had the same Christmas mug for 40 years since I received it as a gift when I was a child. I have two pairs of Christmas pyjamas, both are over five years old. I don’t feel the need to replace stuff that’s not worn out.

I get it OP, I love 'stuff' too. I love pretty trinkets and candles and cushions and nice shoes and earrings, and I love the treasure hunt of finding something lovely in the shops (or online, to be fair). I could easily become a hoarder, it's something I battle against.

My top tip is to take a screenshot and save it on my phone - if I never think of it again I didn't really want it. And also, something I heard recently - think of everything as future landfill. Eventually almost everything will break, or you'll go off it - do you really want to end up chucking it out?

Admittedly I don't like cheap tat (thankfully) - I can't stand places like B&M where everything will only last five minutes. I love finding my old favourite Christmas decorations... but the problem is that I would like to add to them every year. I usually allow myself one or two things. It is hard though.

ETA - I think there is a genetic aspect to it. I've always thought I'd have made an excellent gatherer 😂I would know where all the best berries were.

Luckily I just don’t have that gene to want to accumulate. I have a sister who gets her self caught up with all the latest must haves - jellycays, Stanley’s, labubus etc. I just have no interest in any of that at all.

Yes! The duvet covers! I thought I had a lot of them (we've got 4 or 5), but she had a whole wardrobe full of them. Plus sheets, towels, tablecloths, some of them still in their packets. Clothes and shoes and bags and... It was all lovely stuff too! Plus ornaments, decorations, so many trinkets and collectibles she didn't have the space for, so they were just packed away in boxes. And the jewellery! My DM had hers, her DM's AND her MIL's! It's all in my shed and I don't know what the heck to do with it, thinking about it makes me anxious.

It was an awful thing to have to do in general but after eight billion trips to the charity shop and, in some cases, the dump, I vowed my DC wouldn't have to do the same when I go! So, no more buying stuff just because.

Work out what you can afford - then spend that 👍

You're falling for all the commercialism. Big, bold Christmassy displays, festive music, new lines, pretty Christmassy things that they make you believe you must have. I get taken in with it too but try to stay strong!

Only by visualising the car im savings up for. I literally picked up armfuls if Christmas loveliness in TK Maxx, stopped, thought very hard about a Fiat Panda hybrid and put it all back. I was amazed. I have never in my life exhibited any shopping self control.