I live a 3 hour drive from my parents, my mum has gotten into a habit of visiting 2/3 times a year for a week at a time. We have a very small house, so has to sleep on a air bed in the lounge so as you can imagine nobody really gets any space while shes visiting.
It was fine when DC were little and didn’t have school, they would keep her busy and she was quite happy to entertain them etc and everyone got on.
Now they are school age, she insists on coming when they are at school despite us saying half terms or weekends are much better for us.
My husband & my mum don’t get along at all, unfortunately they fell out and my mum has said quite harsh things to him in the past that were really uncalled for.
It’s also coming up to the 1 year anniversary of my husbands dad passing away and as you can imagine his emotions are running high.
I explained again to my mum that it was a difficult time of year for DH and that this visit would need to be shorter or if anything, could she come after Christmas when the kids are off school. She completely ignored that and decided to book her train tickets for a week.
My husband is admittedly annoyed with me for allowing this (unfortunately she booked her tickets without saying anything to me and couldnt get a refund or change them apparently) he is saying she should of respected what we asked and he feels like she’s deliberately not giving him space on purpose.
Would I be wrong to tell her when she comes that this is the last time she can do this and from going forwards can only come for 3 days maximum? she uses the train as a excuse saying if shes coming all this way it needs to be a week for it to be worth it, but the train is much shorter compared to driving!
(My husband says 3 days is okay but after 3 days tension starts to run high and he isn’t wrong, she loves a moan and can be quite difficult and it causes us to aruge.)