Do you give her Dc a present for an outstanding school report

I never got anything for a school report, but I did get financially rewarded for my GCSE results in 2001.
If I remember correctly, it was £100 for every A, and £50 for anything C or above. With my 1 A*, 7 As and 2 Bs, I made a tidy sum!

No, absolutely not.

I’m not ploughing through all that, but from the infographic in the first link it means internal rather than external?

I’m not sure how that really works at school which many kids (especially at secondary) would choose not to be at, and certainly not doing a test- and exam-heavy curriculum culminating in GCSEs. If DD gets a good test score in French, which she really doesn’t enjoy (not sure why she’s taking it other than doing a language GCSE seemed like a good idea) I’m going to reward that.

I mean - GCSEs are surely completely extrinsic. You do them and do your best because you need GCSEs to progress. Your enjoyment is often neither here nor there.

We celebrate school successes - be it they choose dinner or we buy something small like football cards but sometimes I’ll get something bigger - something I know they want, an item or a particular outing. I don’t say if you do this, I’ll buy that - but I will always reward them, even if it’s just a high five and telling them I am proud of them.
I don’t give money for grades but I give lots of praise and celebrate any ‘wins’, it isn’t about getting 9s but more about the lovely comments in their reports or a teaching calling home with praise or them feeling really proud about something,

My children never got toys or the like unless it was their birthday or Christmas. But if they got a great report, or really excelled at something (won a medal for instance), then they would be get something small that they wanted, like a book. I felt it was good to reward hard work and to try to install a work ethic by doing this. They didn’t get paid for good grades though. Seems to have worked.

I give 1 treat that dc can choose. Usually hot chocolate / occasionally lunch

I do reward. My kids work hard and I feel a small treat is just an extra little thing that goes along with my saying well done and how proud I am of their efforts. It is not about the value of the gift it's about positive recognition.We could do simple things like going out for burgers or pizza or it could be a new something she has been hopelessly trying to save for! I am happy to do it.

Rewarding a child with money, or food, or a toy whatever doesn’t replace the overall reward of success. I grew up with parents who rewarded me tangibly for achievements (they still do!) but that wasn’t what motivated me, I liked it and felt supported, but ultimately when I was doing homework or revising I wasn’t thinking about the potential thing I could get, I was focussed on success, on how that would feel. Tbh as lovely as the gifts were over the years they weren’t huge enough to be the only motivating factor! When I ran home to tell them my results it was their reaction I was excited for, their pride. And I can tell that’s the same with my children. I don’t see why it needs to be either/or, I don’t even mention it throughout the year, it’s not like I say start of the year do X and I will give you Y, it’s just a token of well done after all the effort (and yes another who focusses on effort not grade).

We took our dc out to a steak house for doing well in their school reports. When I say well, yes academically, but also for good and positive behaviour etc.

sprigghr.com/blog/hr-professionals/extrinsic-intrinsic-motivation-examples-whats-the-difference/

https://www.simplypsychology.org/differences-between-extrinsic-and-intrinsic-motivation.html

https://uk.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/extrinsic-intrinsic-motivation

They get to pick lunch if they get straight A's for effort (still in primary school). Effort is the only thing they can control.

What does that mean?

Ditto

Yes I did. I wanted them to know that I was proud and that I recognised their achievement. But I come from a home who ignored/didn't even notice my academic achievements.

I also reward myself when I get a good end of year report at work 🤣

I focus heavily on the effort

I tell them i am really proud of them, with a focus on

• how hard they worked
• behaviour eg comments about them being kind, thoughtful, considerate, respectful
• enthusiasm/perseverance at things they find harder
• general classroom attitude

School reports is a stressful experience here.
they get graded from 1-4 (1 being terrible, 4 being outstanding) on about 100 different factors across the various subjects, as well as current grades and forecasted grades.

DD2 gets about 95%+ 4s with a few 3s. Which is absolutely brilliant. We are extremely pleased with it... the 3s are usually for disorganisation but we are pretty sure she has ADHD like me. She tries so hard.

But DD1 has recieved all 4s on the last two reports... and we know she has again because despite not getting the report yet, she has been invited to the party for those who have got that.

So a consequence of this, DD2 is getting the message from school she isn't as good as her sister, who has also recieved other awards. DD1 now doesn't like getting awards as it upsets her sister... although DD2 always congratulates DD1.

School reports- I haven’t in primary. I’ve shared nice feedback and said I was proud but also have to be slightly careful as some teachers are more effusive than others. 2 years ago, my of my daughters had the most lovely reception teacher while my other one had a slightly more laid back, less positive one. I couldn’t have compared the two without being really unfair.

For outside things like music or dance exams, I tend to celebrate on the day for the effort.

I reward efforts rather than results, but not with cash. If they achieved something really spectacular academically I might do as a PP said and let them choose the venue for a meal out or a takeaway or something like that, but I tell them all the time that I don’t care how their results are, I’m focused on the grade and comments in the effort column of the grade sheet

Same here. DD always got a "well done".
I didn't even get her a graduation present. I didn't even know they were a "thing".

However, as she has a summer birthday we gave always done something special around then anyway.

Yes I get my kids some kind of treat with every report, they get 3 a year, something more substantial for the summer one (not massive, about £20, not cash, it’ll be a gift, they have winter birthdays so works out nicely)Grandparents often get something for the end of year one too! I’ve always viewed school as their work, and in work we reward good performance! I focus on the effort marks.

I always gave my sons a £10 bonus when they had a good school report or a prize/mention from school

No.

Research shows that intrinsic rewards are more effective than extrinsic ones.

No , I haven’t given a present, but you could always treat them to a Costa hot chocolae, for example.

Mine are still primary aged, a good school report or parents evening (like others I really focus on the effort and not the grades) gets them a chocolate bar from the corner shop and DH will let them buy some kind of small add on for whatever game they’re playing (we usually say a firm no to those). So about £5 total each and they are over the moon with that!