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AIBU?

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Original poster

DH night away 38 weeks pregnant

64 replies

Clockworkbananas · 17/11/2025 23:07

DH wants to go away for the night to meet up with friends and I will be 38 weeks pregnant. It’s a few hours away on the train (London, we are in the north east) and I’m guessing he’ll have a few drinks. Last train back is about 10pm.

AIBU to say no? We have a toddler already so I will be looking after them. They could go to grandparents if I went into labour but DH would probably not be there. Toddler was born at 39+1.

OP posts:
Bungle2168 · 18/11/2025 00:08

Sounds like hubby needs a kick in the arse and a reminder that he shortly to be a father to two children.

Tell him to get his head out of his ~. Family comes first, not a drunken jolly in Soho.

Eenameenadeeka · 17/11/2025 23:57

It would be a definite no for me. Babies 2,3 and 4 I was in labour for less than 3 hours each. For something so unnecessary, it's easily avoidable.

Original poster
Clockworkbananas · 17/11/2025 23:36

QueenOfWeeds · 17/11/2025 23:16

It’s a no from me. I’d grandparents had to take the toddler, presumably you would have to give birth without anyone to support you? I know it’s a cliche but labour with number 2 is often much quicker.

Yes I would be alone as it’s just MIL who lives nearby and she’s on her own. My own family are several hours away.

OP posts:
isthisright2020 · 17/11/2025 23:22

Going to go against the grain here. If it’s just one night id say depending on the day off (signs of labour on the horizon etc), yes. Funny enough my only reservation is based on his ability to recover from a hang over if the baby comes later in the day after he is back. He probably wants one last hurrah before the chaos starts again (selfish yes) but if he is one of the good ones I’d let him go.

AlohaRose · 17/11/2025 23:22

Presumably if he is out all afternoon and evening he will be drinking so even if he gets the last train at 10 p.m. he's not going to be much use to you - or able to drive you to hospital etc? He needs to stay home this time.

Original poster
Clockworkbananas · 17/11/2025 23:20

vitalityvix · 17/11/2025 23:16

When you say “away for the night” do you mean overnight or just for the day and getting the train back? I think this should be one of those things that he decides pretty much on the day tbh. There tends to be signs that labour is close so you might get to 38 weeks and not have had any twinges.

My first was born at 37 weeks and my second at 40+1. Don’t count on them coming early!

I think he wants to stay overnight as the last train back is quite early.

There might be signs but there might not as I didn’t have many with DC1! I felt completely normal until waters broke and contractions started a few hours later.

OP posts:
vitalityvix · 17/11/2025 23:16

When you say “away for the night” do you mean overnight or just for the day and getting the train back? I think this should be one of those things that he decides pretty much on the day tbh. There tends to be signs that labour is close so you might get to 38 weeks and not have had any twinges.

My first was born at 37 weeks and my second at 40+1. Don’t count on them coming early!

QueenOfWeeds · 17/11/2025 23:16

It’s a no from me. I’d grandparents had to take the toddler, presumably you would have to give birth without anyone to support you? I know it’s a cliche but labour with number 2 is often much quicker.

WhatMe123 · 17/11/2025 23:16

No from me too close to due date and too far away. Surely he can miss one time to meet them

Original poster
Clockworkbananas · 17/11/2025 23:15

ShamrockShenanigans · 17/11/2025 23:12

A few hours away is a bit far.

Could his friends not meet up in your area, or even halfway?

I don’t think they would, there are 10+ of them in the group who all live in the south east.

The problem is I said it was fine to go as he initially said it was an afternoon meet up but now it seems it’s going to run into the evening/night. If he’s had a drink and there are no more trains he won’t be able to get back.

OP posts:
BluntPlumHam · 17/11/2025 23:15

I’d be fuming if DH even considered this to be honest. He should be home with you in the event you go into the labour.

AlohaRose · 17/11/2025 23:15

I'm usually pretty relaxed about these kind of scenarios but I think your DH needs to give this one a miss. How would he get back if you went into labour at 11pm/midnight? The first train probably wouldn't get him in until breakfast time - he might miss the whole thing!

NuffSaidSam · 17/11/2025 23:13

I'd ask him to miss this one. The baby could easily come while he's away. I think it's too close time-wise.

ShamrockShenanigans · 17/11/2025 23:12

A few hours away is a bit far.

Could his friends not meet up in your area, or even halfway?