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Is it ridiculous to try and become a child psychologist at 42?

113 replies

Spookygoose · 17/11/2025 20:39

AIBU to even consider trying to do this? I’ve got a very high-paying but soul destroying career that I’ve begun to really hate (and which is completely unrelated to psychology). I want out and would love to train as a child psychologist. I own my own home outright & I’m married with one primary-age DD. I’ve got the funds to put myself through a psychology conversion MSc and then the 3 or 4 year doctorate to be able to practice as a licensed psychologist. However, I could not move to another area of the country for the doctorate (which I know is sometimes necessary). I live in the South East. I know doctorate programs are also ridiculously competitive and I’m not confident I’d be one of the most academically gifted students. My previous career was in the arts and I’ve always been creative but not amazing when it comes to maths and science. On top of that, even in the likely event I managed to get onto a doctorate not long after the MSc, is still be pushing 50 by the time I qualify. Am I dreaming or has anyone actually done anything similar?

OP posts:
thetallfairy · 19/11/2025 19:01

Late40sBloomer · 18/11/2025 10:56

I'm a trainee educational and child psychologist in my late 40s. Just a few comments based on those above...

-Both clinical and educational can lead to working with children.
-Both are equally as competitive (I applied and interviewed for both a number of times).
-Being an older applicant isn't necessarily a barrier, I'm aware of a number of trainees in their 40s/50s, we have a lot of experience to bring and still many years of work ahead of us!
-You would need experience of working with children for the EP doctorate.
-While the course is enjoyable it definitely has impacted my availability as a mother, I have a great support network which has helped but still carry some guilt around this.
-I didn't have to move but do travel for uni which involves long days (not everyone in my cohort lives further away). My placement is local which works well.
-If I could go back I'd probably look to train as a Speech and Language Therapist or OT as the route would have been faster. It did take me a long time to get my ducks in a row to get to this point.
-Assistant EPs earn around 36K, while trainees get around 30K (16K, tax free in Year 1). APs (clinical) earn less than AsEPs but trainee clin psychs earn more than trainee EPs (NHS Band 6 I believe).

Its a tough slog for 3 years, consuming and constant. Obviously good employment prospects once qualified (though watch out for changes to the role in terms of statutory work involvement in next year's White Paper on SEND).

Maybe join the Facebook group Educational psychology doctoral applicants to have a look at the posts there.

Best of luck whatever you decide!

What do you mean in relation to changes to the role of an EP as of next year?

They are involved in all EHC assessments now aren't they?

CoffeeLipstickKeys · 19/11/2025 06:59

whyyy321 · 19/11/2025 05:51

Your age is not a block to training as a clinical psychologist (if that's what you want), life experience is often helpful. However you'll need some experience working clinically (not necessarily with children, that can come later on the doctorate) as without that you are very unlikely to get a spot training (especially if you are geographically limited as to the courses you can apply for - luckily there are quite a few in south eat, depending where you are). Research is a valid pathway to training too - working as a research assistant if the project has clinical contacts (such as working with a mh population with face to face contact, etc). You don't have to have been an assistant psychologist, there are other ways to get experience (but all will involve a pay cut for you!).

I will caution that many trusts have hiring freezes in psychology, despite increased pressure and increased clinical target to reduce waiting times (essentially see more patients with no more staff). There is a lot of pressure on the profession to account for every minute, and a lot of hurt and upset people when they finally get to your appointment after waiting years. It'd not do a different job but it's not easy and it's often morally challenging working in such a broken system.

Alternatives that might be of interest are speech and language or OT. Have a think about what it is you want from this career change - I changed because I wanted to feel I was needed (not sure what that says about me!) and wanted to be a key part of an MDT. OT colleagues do lots of independent interventions, and a lot of their work is very much psychology at the core (particularly when in a mh setting, but arguably in all settings). For example, identifying values and working with people to live aligned with values to improve wellbeing whilst working with physical or mental barriers (aligns with therapies such as ACT and CFT) and some exposure type work also (helping build resilience and confidence in feared situations). SaLT (and OT actually) do comprehensive assessments and give clinical opinion and intervention based on this - both cognitively and more language specific, to the extent that I will often defer to salt cognitive assessments rather than perform full batteries myself as their insights are often more practical and applied to the real world.

Both careers would "only" require 3 years (rather than 1/2 conversion and 3 years doctorate with a thesis, plus experience in between) and would get you working in the field far quicker and are very rewarding, hands on jobs.

It depends what you want, but you are age being in a different field now is not a reason not to.

Excellent post,comprehensive advice. Accurate too

PrincessFairyWren · 19/11/2025 06:59

I worked in manufacturing and started full time study in my forties to become an occupational therapist. I qualified at 47. I love the role and am glad I did. No regrets at all.

one thing that was a bit hard was my kids being older they stayed up late making it difficult to study in the evenings. With young ones you could probably start studying by 9pm. My kids were always up and pestering me for stuff and it was difficult to ignore them. So don’t think it will necessarily be easier if you wait till they are older.

Also consider other allied health roles if psychology is too intense. Have you worked with kids before? Can you get advice from people already practicing?

Hotdoughnut · 19/11/2025 06:30

I'm usually one who says go it, but in this case no. I recently did a lot of research for a child psychologist for my daughter (private) and didn't even consider anyone with less than 10 years experience. I think competition will be too high and you'll be retiring before you've reached your full potential. Your current experience is just too different, you'd need to build up clinical experience before even getting started.

Mrswhiskers87 · 19/11/2025 06:15

OP, working as a psychologist will be incredibly stressful. So not much of a break from your current predicament.

I work in secondary mental health service and our psychology team is incredibly stressed with huge waiting lists and carrying a lot of risk. That isn’t a reason not to do it but if you’re looking for a break from a stressful career, this isn’t the job for you.

whyyy321 · 19/11/2025 05:51

Your age is not a block to training as a clinical psychologist (if that's what you want), life experience is often helpful. However you'll need some experience working clinically (not necessarily with children, that can come later on the doctorate) as without that you are very unlikely to get a spot training (especially if you are geographically limited as to the courses you can apply for - luckily there are quite a few in south eat, depending where you are). Research is a valid pathway to training too - working as a research assistant if the project has clinical contacts (such as working with a mh population with face to face contact, etc). You don't have to have been an assistant psychologist, there are other ways to get experience (but all will involve a pay cut for you!).

I will caution that many trusts have hiring freezes in psychology, despite increased pressure and increased clinical target to reduce waiting times (essentially see more patients with no more staff). There is a lot of pressure on the profession to account for every minute, and a lot of hurt and upset people when they finally get to your appointment after waiting years. It'd not do a different job but it's not easy and it's often morally challenging working in such a broken system.

Alternatives that might be of interest are speech and language or OT. Have a think about what it is you want from this career change - I changed because I wanted to feel I was needed (not sure what that says about me!) and wanted to be a key part of an MDT. OT colleagues do lots of independent interventions, and a lot of their work is very much psychology at the core (particularly when in a mh setting, but arguably in all settings). For example, identifying values and working with people to live aligned with values to improve wellbeing whilst working with physical or mental barriers (aligns with therapies such as ACT and CFT) and some exposure type work also (helping build resilience and confidence in feared situations). SaLT (and OT actually) do comprehensive assessments and give clinical opinion and intervention based on this - both cognitively and more language specific, to the extent that I will often defer to salt cognitive assessments rather than perform full batteries myself as their insights are often more practical and applied to the real world.

Both careers would "only" require 3 years (rather than 1/2 conversion and 3 years doctorate with a thesis, plus experience in between) and would get you working in the field far quicker and are very rewarding, hands on jobs.

It depends what you want, but you are age being in a different field now is not a reason not to.

VividLemonLeader · 19/11/2025 05:30

Don’t do it
I’m a psychologist, don’t work in clinical (don’t want to), but got tons of friends who do.

  1. you need maths. i did A level maths, and glad I did. especially for the doctorate
  2. the doctorate is extreme competitive
  3. the job is hard, especially with current funding. its a case of doing too little too late all day every day. one of my friends compared it to being an intensive care nurse, but only being given band aids.Or going private, knowing you can only help people with money/people are going into crazy depth to help their children
youegg · 19/11/2025 05:17

User34735278 · 17/11/2025 20:47

Not ridiculous but I wouldnt do it. I tried for three years to become a clinical psychologist- getting onto the training is brutally competitive because there arent enough training places and that was with extensive experience as an assistant psychologist and a first class psych degree. You will have to then do placements all over and with a young child that will be incredibly hard.

I am honestly not trying to be negative here but its not an easy road and the job is stressful at the end of it.

Came on to say exactly the above. I tried for 4 years to get on the DClinPsych to no avail.

Urmam · 18/11/2025 23:24

Bushmillsbabe · 18/11/2025 22:30

I'm so glad it was helpful. We have a fabulous art therapist where I work. I don't fully understand it but I do know she gets brilliant results with children who have been through a variety of traumas.

Yeah I don't know what kind of magic she worked but gradually my son started opening up (to me, after the sessions rather than to her)

Bushmillsbabe · 18/11/2025 22:30

Urmam · 17/11/2025 21:57

My son had an art therapist when he went through a traumatic time but couldnt find a way to talk about it. She was so amazing,. really transformative
I felt privileged I could pay for her privately

I'm so glad it was helpful. We have a fabulous art therapist where I work. I don't fully understand it but I do know she gets brilliant results with children who have been through a variety of traumas.

Poonu · 18/11/2025 17:56

Chocolateapot · 17/11/2025 21:49

Nurses are fantastic and worth their weight in gold but their job is completely different!

I'm referring to mental health nurses who move up grades to 8. The work was not very different to what I did.

wizzywig · 18/11/2025 15:09

Maybe an iapt programme that focuses on children?

Breadandbutta · 18/11/2025 15:08

CoffeeLipstickKeys · 17/11/2025 21:40

Possible,y. Common, absolutely not
Did he have work experience prior to or during his degree.

He had a penis.

ThrowAway987654321 · 18/11/2025 11:06

I'm a Clinical Psychologist with a CAMHS specialism, and I wouldn't...

Late40sBloomer · 18/11/2025 10:56

I'm a trainee educational and child psychologist in my late 40s. Just a few comments based on those above...

-Both clinical and educational can lead to working with children.
-Both are equally as competitive (I applied and interviewed for both a number of times).
-Being an older applicant isn't necessarily a barrier, I'm aware of a number of trainees in their 40s/50s, we have a lot of experience to bring and still many years of work ahead of us!
-You would need experience of working with children for the EP doctorate.
-While the course is enjoyable it definitely has impacted my availability as a mother, I have a great support network which has helped but still carry some guilt around this.
-I didn't have to move but do travel for uni which involves long days (not everyone in my cohort lives further away). My placement is local which works well.
-If I could go back I'd probably look to train as a Speech and Language Therapist or OT as the route would have been faster. It did take me a long time to get my ducks in a row to get to this point.
-Assistant EPs earn around 36K, while trainees get around 30K (16K, tax free in Year 1). APs (clinical) earn less than AsEPs but trainee clin psychs earn more than trainee EPs (NHS Band 6 I believe).

Its a tough slog for 3 years, consuming and constant. Obviously good employment prospects once qualified (though watch out for changes to the role in terms of statutory work involvement in next year's White Paper on SEND).

Maybe join the Facebook group Educational psychology doctoral applicants to have a look at the posts there.

Best of luck whatever you decide!

PermanentTemporary · 18/11/2025 10:04

I’d be another saying DO work towards retraining but do remain open to other options. I started a speech therapy degree at 39, wasn’t the oldest on the course.

HearMeOutt · 18/11/2025 09:55

Not at all. Sorry I haven’t RTFT but I think many careers really benefit from the value of life experience and if you’ve raised children this will be hugely valuable. I can’t imagine a fresh out of university 22 year old would have the life experience you would so I say go for it.

SleepQuest33 · 18/11/2025 09:53

Yes I’d say it’s too late.
i have a family member who is a clinical psychologist. It takes many years of study, which is not an issue even at 42, the problem is the difficulty in finding a placement that will allow you to do the doctorate, it’s like hens teeth.

Busybeemumm · 18/11/2025 09:50

User34735278 · 18/11/2025 09:10

I still remember the interview process even now and it makes my palms sweat! I had three separate interviews in front of three panels of tutors. I was so nervous that I fluffed what I wanted to say and the moment I left the room I knew I wouldnt get in. I had built it up so much in my mind that my anxiety was through the roof.

The whole process is gruelling and with the benefit of hindsight it's baffling what we put ourselves through. Left me feeling like I needed the services of a clinical psychologist myself!
Gosh this thread has reminded me of those times as well.

OP- it's difficult process and there are so many other amazing opportunities and experiences out there. Maybe talk to some psychologists to get a their perspectives on how the process is now.

User34735278 · 18/11/2025 09:10

Busybeemumm · 18/11/2025 09:00

There should be some kind of support group for us ex applicants 😀I also really thought i would get in at some point. The whole experience really left me exhausted and down. I chucked it all in and made the best decision to travel and live abroad for some time!

Agree - it's healing to know that others were in the same boat at the time.

I still remember the interview process even now and it makes my palms sweat! I had three separate interviews in front of three panels of tutors. I was so nervous that I fluffed what I wanted to say and the moment I left the room I knew I wouldnt get in. I had built it up so much in my mind that my anxiety was through the roof.

indoorplantqueen · 18/11/2025 09:01

I retrained as a psychologist (educational) after being a teacher. I completed a psychology conversion also before doctoral training. You’re not too old to retrain but you also need to have at least 1 years full time experience in a related setting. But in reality you’re in competition (for any of the psychology doctorates) with people with years and years of experience (who still don’t get on).

Busybeemumm · 18/11/2025 09:00

User34735278 · 18/11/2025 07:16

Same for me- but looking back I am glad. My best friend got in and he was managing whole teams on relatively little pay (for the responsibility). I ended up starting my own business which personally, was much better.

There should be some kind of support group for us ex applicants 😀I also really thought i would get in at some point. The whole experience really left me exhausted and down. I chucked it all in and made the best decision to travel and live abroad for some time!

Agree - it's healing to know that others were in the same boat at the time.

CoffeeLipstickKeys · 18/11/2025 08:28

HairOil · 18/11/2025 08:13

Then he’s unusually lucky. A friend of mine spent four or five years trying to get a doctoral place in the late 90s/early 2000s, with a First, a MSC with distinction and a lot of relevant experience. She spent a lot of her time during those years working evening jobs and living in a bedsit so that she could fund her own stints volunteering in appropriate settings to make herself a better candidate.

She omitted he was uni lecturer in…wait for it…psychology… with a PhD

HairOil · 18/11/2025 08:13

GreyCloudsLooming · 17/11/2025 21:32

One of my young relatives didn’t have to move. He also had not worked as an assistant psychologist, and he was accepted on the course on his first attempt. So it is possible.

Then he’s unusually lucky. A friend of mine spent four or five years trying to get a doctoral place in the late 90s/early 2000s, with a First, a MSC with distinction and a lot of relevant experience. She spent a lot of her time during those years working evening jobs and living in a bedsit so that she could fund her own stints volunteering in appropriate settings to make herself a better candidate.

SugarPlumpFairyCakes · 18/11/2025 08:04

You’ve got the funds. You’ve got the ambition. Go for it.

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